TheSingleGuy Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I keep reading thread after thread on here where girls find themselves attracted to the "player type". Seriously, I don't want to hurt any women, that's not where I'm going with this, but I also don't want to settle with a woman I'm not that in to and that is exactly what's gonna end up happening unless I start getting more dates. So what does the player do? How does he approach? Does he try to get you home that night? Does he try to make out with you the night he meets you? How long does he wait to contact you? What makes you think he's a player? Lastly, will most women refuse to go out with the "player type"? Is the player persistent if you do refuse the first date? Please ladies, write a brief summation about your last encounter with the player. How'd you meet, how'd you know he was a player, did you go out with him. Every detail. PLEASE TELL.
serial muse Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Wait, what? That's what you get out of the responses to your other thread?
Feelsgoodman Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 A player is not necessarily malicious in his intentions; he is simply selfish. He is not intentionally trying to hurt the women that fall for him, but at the same time, he doesn't really care if they get hurt. Ironically, not caring is one of the key qualities that makes players attractive to women. Men who do not care are seen as confident. They also live in the present without worrying about future consequences of their action, which women find exciting.
snug.bunny Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I think the term "player" is stupid. I divide men into two categories...liars/cheaters or non-liars/cheaters. Not being open to a relationship and being upfront about it, but still able to find women to date in spite of her knowing he is emotionally unavailable upfront, equals an honest guy who doesn't need to play women or lie in order to score...I know one man who is like this and he openly tells women he is not a relationship guy and he still does just fine.
Pasttense Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Do you see the title of this website? It's called Love Shack. You are simply in the wrong place if you wish to learn how to become a player. Do a Google search for terms like pickup artist forum or seduction forum or alpha male forum ....
Author TheSingleGuy Posted September 28, 2011 Author Posted September 28, 2011 I'm not saying I'm uninterested in a relationship. The problem is, for guys, we ask out girl A, girl B & girl C. Only girl A will go out with us, the other two reject us (and of course we never get told what we did wrong or get any constructive feedback whatsoever). Now we feel lucky to have a date at all. So we tend to cling to the first woman we find that'll have us because we're convinced that if we go back into the dating world, we're just gonna be subjecting ourselves to even more rejection. Even if girl A isn't all that, we settle. Which, in my opinion, is probably why 80% of women complain about how her husband isn't that into her and he ignores her. Ultimately, I believe it's because we were too scared to keep dating and find a better girl. That was the mistake I made and I KNOW most men make the very same mistake. And I also believe this is why 80% of married women aren't happy. For me, I need to make dating less rejection filled. And the only way to do that is to figure out a way to make girls B & C want to date me too. That way, I can get to know them all, and if none are a match, I can ask out girls D, E & F until I find a girl I really want who also wants me too. From what I can see, the "player type" is getting all the dates because there is thread after thread on here where women talk about how they know better, but they are attracted to the player.
Pierre Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I keep reading thread after thread on here where girls find themselves attracted to the "player type". Seriously, I don't want to hurt any women, that's not where I'm going with this, but I also don't want to settle with a woman I'm not that in to and that is exactly what's gonna end up happening unless I start getting more dates. So what does the player do? How does he approach? Does he try to get you home that night? Does he try to make out with you the night he meets you? How long does he wait to contact you? What makes you think he's a player? Lastly, will most women refuse to go out with the "player type"? Is the player persistent if you do refuse the first date? Please ladies, write a brief summation about your last encounter with the player. How'd you meet, how'd you know he was a player, did you go out with him. Every detail. PLEASE TELL. You are still looking for advice on how to get women??????????;) By now you know that looks is not enough; you need the whole package. You established you have model type looks with a six pack abdomen. You need to figure out why the women are not attracted? It is not a matter of adding more moves to your arsenal. You need to simplify your look and not try to be a player. A non-player that tries to be a player has little success.
Stung Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Has anybody besides me noticed how all these posters who keep reiterating that they are so clever and logical, and who tend to make silly comments about the illogical nature of the female brain, also keep throwing around these ridiculous made up statistics? Also, why is it always 80%, all of a sudden? Is using the made-up statistic of 80% somehow more convincingly logical than 75% or 90%? 90% just seemed like too much when the previous wave of posters overused it in their dazzling displays of pure logic, amirite?
LurkerXX Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I always take it as a "well women, look what you made me do!!! hurumph!! Its all your faults!" type commentary and just leave it. If that is what they are determined to do, it is their life.
snug.bunny Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I'm not saying I'm uninterested in a relationship. The problem is, for guys, we ask out girl A, girl B & girl C. Only girl A will go out with us, the other two reject us (and of course we never get told what we did wrong or get any constructive feedback whatsoever). Now we feel lucky to have a date at all. So we tend to cling to the first woman we find that'll have us because we're convinced that if we go back into the dating world, we're just gonna be subjecting ourselves to even more rejection. Even if girl A isn't all that, we settle. Which, in my opinion, is probably why 80% of women complain about how her husband isn't that into her and he ignores her. Ultimately, I believe it's because we were too scared to keep dating and find a better girl. That was the mistake I made and I KNOW most men make the very same mistake. And I also believe this is why 80% of married women aren't happy. For me, I need to make dating less rejection filled. And the only way to do that is to figure out a way to make girls B & C want to date me too. That way, I can get to know them all, and if none are a match, I can ask out girls D, E & F until I find a girl I really want who also wants me too. From what I can see, the "player type" is getting all the dates because there is thread after thread on here where women talk about how they know better, but they are attracted to the player. A lot of times, women do not know the guy is a jerk stringing her along, until she's already somewhat attached and by then, it's too late. Obviously by this last post, you do not have what it takes to get/keep a woman genuinely interested, so you're looking to resort to shady methods in order to fix that. Do what works for you I guess.
Quiet Storm Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Players aren't afraid of rejection, they expect it. It doesn't bother them. Their attitude regarding rejection is "her loss... next". They cast out many lines, and hope for a few bites. They don't dwell on the ones that rejected them, they just keep casting more lines. Instead of trying to attract girls that won't reject you, get thicker skin so rejection doesn't hurt as much. This will enable you to pursue without the fear of being rejected.
Imageiko Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 They are not attracted to the "player type" they are attracted to guys with confidence. More often than not the "player type" has confidence where as the more shy/introverted guy may not or may not display it as well.
Johnny85 Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Why don't you focus on things that add value to your life instead? Focus on your confidence level, social skills, career, find friends that add value to your life, learn how to dance or write comic books or whatever interests you have. Interact with new people and learn from them. Travel, make money, go back to school. Ask more women out on dates, not only for how they look but because they are also interesting and compatible. I think you will find more value from focusing on these things than on unreal, unsustainable goals that won't last. Cheers!!!
Cypress25 Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 If a woman is attracted to a player, it's not because he's a player. She usually discovers that later, after she's already gotten attached. Or maybe she can tell right away, but she's attracted to him anyway, despite the fact that he's a player. It's his other qualities that make him attractive, so the woman is willing to overlook that one character flaw. The "player" part is the part that women don't like. So here's the thing about players. It's a personality type. If you want to become a player, you have to change your personality. Good luck with that.
nofool4u Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I keep reading thread after thread on here where girls find themselves attracted to the "player type". bah. women will say they don't want the bad boys, but thats exactly who they are attracted to. then after a while, they end up whining about how they got played by them. frankly, I get tired of hearing it.
Imajerk17 Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I'm disappointed reading the responses of the women on here. Much better responses were given in SingleGuy's other thread and in MrNates's thread. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t299729/
grkBoy Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I keep reading thread after thread on here where girls find themselves attracted to the "player type". Seriously, I don't want to hurt any women, that's not where I'm going with this, but I also don't want to settle with a woman I'm not that in to and that is exactly what's gonna end up happening unless I start getting more dates. So what does the player do? How does he approach? Does he try to get you home that night? Does he try to make out with you the night he meets you? How long does he wait to contact you? What makes you think he's a player? Lastly, will most women refuse to go out with the "player type"? Is the player persistent if you do refuse the first date? Please ladies, write a brief summation about your last encounter with the player. How'd you meet, how'd you know he was a player, did you go out with him. Every detail. PLEASE TELL. Did you ever think about dressing the part, but being a nice guy...or a confident good man? Screwed up girls need to be played...but most women won't turn away the hot looking well-dressed confident gentleman. I don't care who chimes in claiming women don't respect men who respect them. That's BS. I wasn't turning heads until I lost weight and learned to dress better...as well as grew more confidence in chatting with women. Most nice guys I encounter are "ugly" in some way. They look ugly, or dress badly, or can't carry themselves socially. There are even guys who think they're "nice guys", but they're really just creepy. Being rejected by women doesn't make you nice. Pick up some copies of GQ and Details. Learn to dress better. Lose weight if you're fat, or get healthy if you're not. No one said you need to be chiseled, but you can't be frumpy and bland. Get your hair fixed up and learn how to maintain it...do a style that screams "hottie" and not some bland "comfy" thing you've been doing for years. Talk to people, make friends, be charming, be sociable. If your neck of the woods is all cliques, fake people, or douchebags...then go somewhere else. Travel. See the world. Meet people. Take chances. Look at the men most women drool over. Be them. Forget the playa thing. Most women don't want a playa...but they want a good man who comes packaged as the playa or bad boy. So why not be that?
Cypress25 Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 Most nice guys I encounter are "ugly" in some way. They look ugly, or dress badly, or can't carry themselves socially. There are even guys who think they're "nice guys", but they're really just creepy. Being rejected by women doesn't make you nice. +1. I can't even tell you how many guys are in denial about this whole "nice" thing. They think women are rejecting them because they're too nice. In reality, women are rejecting them because they're unattractive and/or have no social skills whatsoever. Nice has nothing to do with it.
grkBoy Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 Case in point...I've been to social affairs where guys walk in wearing the polo shirt and khakis while the girls are dressed more fashionable. The guys have plain haircuts and look very plain, average, and boring. Is it any wonder why the women in the room are looking at the few guys who are dressed nicer? Walk into a nightclub. Look at the guys who seemingly catch the attention of the women. Look at the male bartenders. Look at them all. You'll see ideas on what women are drooling over and why that plain "comfy" look isn't going to get eyes on you. I went to Marshalls and bought some casual sportcoats that are a bit on the trendy fashion side...not the "formal suit" side. I'll wear them to work with a t-shirt, boot-cut jeans, some bowler shoes, and even a short-brimmed fedora that I bought at TARGET. And yet I'll get compliments from female coworkers. This isn't rocket science guys. Like it or not, physical looks do a lot in this dating thing, and I've said it over and over...you don't have to become some athletic dream man. Just really look at your hair and fashion...and try something new. You would even be surprised how much this will boost your confidence...which then helps you even more in picking up women.
Author TheSingleGuy Posted September 29, 2011 Author Posted September 29, 2011 grkBoy, Physical looks don't matter that much with women. I am told I'm hot, sexy and handsome all the time. I've even had some women go on like this at length until they sound like a broken record. Then these very same women who went on and on about how hot I was end up totally blowing me off in phone game. I'm beginning to really believe it doesn't matter that much at all. Honestly, I don't know if women are throwing me into the player category when they meet me or the nice guy/husband category. I have no idea. I've had women tell me I'm really sweet and I've had women tell me I'm "such a little player". I'm clueless. All I know is, I get blown off by women more often now than I did before I was getting all these compliments and before I undertook all the self improvements.
january2011 Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 I keep reading thread after thread on here where girls find themselves attracted to the "player type". Seriously, I don't want to hurt any women, that's not where I'm going with this, but I also don't want to settle with a woman I'm not that in to and that is exactly what's gonna end up happening unless I start getting more dates. So what does the player do? How does he approach? Does he try to get you home that night? Does he try to make out with you the night he meets you? How long does he wait to contact you? What makes you think he's a player? Lastly, will most women refuse to go out with the "player type"? Is the player persistent if you do refuse the first date? Please ladies, write a brief summation about your last encounter with the player. How'd you meet, how'd you know he was a player, did you go out with him. Every detail. PLEASE TELL. I'll give you the highlights: I met him on a social trip. We ended up spending a lot of the day together. The other girls on the trip were fawning over him and passing him their telephone numbers. He looked very sure of himself but he was also a bit of a puppy-dog. Very handsome and working a professional job. I did go out with him. It turned into a very brief fling. He used every trick that I listed in Mr Nate's thread linked to by Imajerk17. And it worked. Do I regret the experience? Yes and no. He showed me another side of the dating world and I needed the lesson. It was a wake-up call. I think that there's something to be said for some of the techniques that players use. However, that doesn't mean that you need to take everything to heart and take on the entire persona. You can use some of the techniques to build up your confidence and competency so that when you are with the right girl, the one you truly want to be with, you aren't inhibited in showing her that you are interested. It's attractive that a guy knows how to physically stimulate a woman so that she feels wanted by him but the added bonus is that you also put your heart into it because you are showing your love in a physical way and not the cynical 'I can get any woman by pushing X, Y, Z buttons' way that most hardened players seem to have.
Calutaxi484 Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 They are not attracted to the "player type" they are attracted to guys with confidence. More often than not the "player type" has confidence where as the more shy/introverted guy may not or may not display it as well. This. Being a "player type" won't get you women, acting like a man will. I've said it thread after thread, and it's simple advice. Clingy/insecure and submissive guys aren't what most women are looking for. It's the EASIEST way to kill attraction.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 Wait, you're confused as being a player, but you view it in positive terms? Seek therapy, man. Being a player isn't a good thing.
nofool4u Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 Most nice guys I encounter are "ugly" in some way. They look ugly, or dress badly, or can't carry themselves socially. There are even guys who think they're "nice guys", but they're really just creepy. Being rejected by women doesn't make you nice. Not true at all. Alot of nice guys are good looking, dress well, etc. They simply aren't players and don't do the things that women seem to go for. Too many women will confuse confidence with cockiness. And they want someone that is exciting. Whether that means someone that goes out and parties up, whatever, most nice guys aren't partiers. And partiers aren't relationship material. So the women go for these types, then end up bitching why they can't find a nice guy.
nofool4u Posted September 29, 2011 Posted September 29, 2011 This. Being a "player type" won't get you women, acting like a man will. I've said it thread after thread, and it's simple advice. Clingy/insecure and submissive guys aren't what most women are looking for. It's the EASIEST way to kill attraction. but then they whine about the bad boys. there are many men who act like men, but aren't the bad boy type. they can be good looking, but simply have their head screwed on right. but too many times that isn't exciting enough for women. so women can go for the bad boys all they want. most people just don't want to hear them bitching about it when they get played.
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