youngskywalker Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 I posted a response here and it made me think. When does dating and love stop? I've been worried in the past that after a certain age the dating game ends. My observation is that isn't at all true. If you want to have a healthy love and sex life it can last until the day you die. I'd like to hear from some of the mature in age people here about how your dating life has progressed over the years. I hear that the retirement communities are like orgies. High std rates and everything.
Kamille Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 My grandfather met his girlfriend at the age of 72 (my grandmother had died two years before). He and his girlfriend were in love and great companions.
ascendotum Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 I hear that the retirement communities are like orgies. High std rates and everything. You gotta be kidding me. Orgies, I don't believe it. Maybe a rumour put out by a retirement village chain. Where I live there has been quite an increase in the % singles over 40 as Gen-x gets older. Dating, ons, fwb and living life via a series of relationships works fine for most when you're in you are in your prime, but will it carry through to old age. Will women be happy doing ons and fwb as they get older or will they just want the 'hold hands and walk on the beach at sunset' relationship. I think I am going to have a hard time getting aroused to chase women over 50, but we'll see what happens.
OliveOyl Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Middle-aged woman chiming in... The biggest difference between dating now and 20 years ago is that dating is much more complicated. Mainly due to juggling schedules between kids, stepkids, exes (even if divorced for years, the parent(s) of your kids and/or your date/partner's kids are still around) and/or work. Dating was so simple when all I had to consider for a weekend getaway was me and my partner. Now there are at least *4* other people's lives to consider. However, feelings (romantic, attachment, sexual, etc.) are just as good ... and I think there's probably less drama overall. My BF's father met his last wife at age 72 and was very happily married to her until he passed away.
Jynxx Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Nothing changes about dating. People change with getting older. People make the rules.
D-Lish Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Dating at 40 is much different. When I was younger, I went out much more often. Now that all my friends are married with kids, I don't get out much- so it's impossible to meet men. I do online dating, but I don't remember the last time I got a message that I responded to.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 Well, at 18, I was hopeless with girls. At 28, I am still hopeless with girls. At 38, I will probably still be hopeless with girls. So it doesn't change all that much. At least, if you are me!
Emilia Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 I am 39 so I'm not sure whether that's a mature enough age for your purposes but I have a glimpse of what dating is going to be like for me for the next 30 years I think. I'm much more active and confident than I was in my 20s and early 30s and I enjoy it so much I think I'll carry on as long as I'm physically able to. This means changes in my friends' social life (married, kids, etc) doesn't affect me because I go and meet new people a lot through physical activities like sailing for example. I also like younger men and seem to do much better with guys in their 20s now than when I was their age I think that attraction for youngers ones will remain. It feels like I have found my feet, I have worked out a way of meeting men, I enjoy being active and strong so as long as I carry on with that I'll do so. I'm looking for a long term relationship now (wasn't for years and years) but I suspect I will still date several men before I die.
CarrieT Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 When does dating and love stop? It never stops. A friend of mine just turned 76 years old and she is HAVING AN AFFAIR with an 82-year old man who desperately wants to leave his wife of 58 years to be with the "one and true love he has ever experienced." My 76-year old friend had two abusive marriages and is experienced oral sex for the first time in her life. I kid you not. I will say that dating does get more complicated in middle age but I believe it is because we also work through our existence with much more confidence and intellectualism versus pure, adolescent hormones. So much of youthful dating is based purely on the physical and hormonal; you see someone and feel a connection and act upon it. By middle age, reason steps in much sooner as one analyzes the connection and probabilities... It makes it more annoying but it can also make the connection deeper and more substantial.
thatone Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 i agree. in your 20s it's pretty much just sexual attraction or lack thereof. now in my 30s the options are much more, if nothing else. women in their 30s are anxious to find relationships rather than short term flings because there's social and familial pressure for them to get married and have kids, but you can also go back and pull from the crop of 24-27 year olds if you so choose because as a man you're more financially stable than those mid 20s men are. so for a man your prime years are 30-35.
Recommended Posts