caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 If a guy says he wants to get to know a girl better, does it always mean he's interested?
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 Yes, that's usually the case. I cannot speak for other guys, but when I have said that, it meant was I really interested in the girl, I enjoyed being around her and would like to 'get to know her better'.
Pierre Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 If a guy says he wants to get to know a girl better, does it always mean he's interested? If he is a player he is saying what you want to hear so he can have sex with you. If the man is shy and not a player it means he really likes you. It is not rocket science, but some women cannot tell the difference.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 If he is a player he is saying what you want to hear so he can have sex with you. If the man is shy and not a player it means he really likes you. It is not rocket science, but some women cannot tell the difference. If you would enlighten me please. This guy isn't shy but I don't think he's a player either.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 Yes, that's usually the case. I cannot speak for other guys, but when I have said that, it meant was I really interested in the girl, I enjoyed being around her and would like to 'get to know her better'. "really interested." Wow.
oaks Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 If a guy says he wants to get to know a girl better, does it always mean he's interested? It means what it says, unless you're asking us if a particular guy is lying. My crystal ball broke when I dropped it down the stairs, so I can't tell about that.
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 The only girls I have told that to are the ones I was really interested in but that doesn't mean I say it to every girl I am really interested in; if I say it, I say it. But generally girls I feel half-hearted about or girls that I only have mild interest in, I don't really want to get to know them better...and basically I don't even see them again after one or two meetings, or they remain acquaintances. I agree with Pierre, players would say that just to have sex with you. Some of them do it so well, they pretend to get to know you, pretend to listen and take interest in your life, until they really get what they want.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 The only girls I have told that to are the ones I was really interested in but that doesn't mean I say it to every girl I am really interested in; if I say it, I say it. But generally girls I feel half-hearted about or girls that I only have mild interest in, I don't really want to get to know them better...and basically I don't even see them again after one or two meetings, or they remain acquaintances. I agree with Pierre, players would say that just to have sex with you. Some of them do it so well, they pretend to get to know you, pretend to listen and take interest in your life, until they really get what they want. Actually this reminds me of an incident. A guy said this. Then a few days later not soon after I first knew him, he told he wanted to have sex with me. And within that time, we didn't get to know each other that much.
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 Actually this reminds me of an incident. A guy said this. Then a few days later not soon after I first knew him, he told he wanted to have sex with me. And within that time, we didn't get to know each other that much. That's too funny. Sorry, I couldn't help it. With players, they easily move on from girl to girl, so if one doesn't get what he wants from you, he'll have another he can get it from. So you can pretty much tell if a guy really wants to get to know you. One who does wouldn't try to push anything onto you that you're not comfortable with. He'll remember little things and actively ask about you and take an interest in your life, meanwhile he's not trying to go sexual too fast. I'm not sure if I'm on the right track, since I'm a guy... but it's just what I would do if I really wanted to pick a girl's mind and learn more about her By the way, I know some guys that would hang around a girl for years just to get sex from her, without having any real interest in her as a person. But tell us about your current guy!
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 That's too funny. Sorry, I couldn't help it. With players, they easily move on from girl to girl, so if one doesn't get what he wants from you, he'll have another he can get it from. So you can pretty much tell if a guy really wants to get to know you. One who does wouldn't try to push anything onto you that you're not comfortable with. He'll remember little things and actively ask about you and take an interest in your life, meanwhile he's not trying to go sexual too fast. I'm not sure if I'm on the right track, since I'm a guy... but it's just what I would do if I really wanted to pick a girl's mind and learn more about her By the way, I know some guys that would hang around a girl for years just to get sex from her, without having any real interest in her as a person. But tell us about your current guy! He kept stressing he wants to know me better. However he doesn't ask me a lot about myself. Just telling me that and what plans he has for dates. Normal? Player?
thatone Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 He kept stressing he wants to know me better. However he doesn't ask me a lot about myself. Just telling me that and what plans he has for dates. you answered your own question. as pierre said, it's not rocket science.
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 He kept stressing he wants to know me better. However he doesn't ask me a lot about myself. Just telling me that and what plans he has for dates. Normal? Player? If he stressed it after a date, he's probably trying to secure another date. But how did he interact in your previous meetings with him? How many dates have you had and how did they go? Did he talk a lot about himself? Was he flirty/fun? Did he ask a bit about you and seemed intent on listening and did he reciprocate with an answer of his own? Getting to know not only consists of getting to you about you but also how you like to have fun, how your interaction with him would be like. Most importantly, did you have fun? If you did, I would say just go on another date and see how it goes that's if you want to get to know him better. I can speak for myself, when I'm interested in a girl, I would ask about her, she would tell stories... we should share laughs, I should ask follow questions and things will just go from there... Bare in mind, it's not like an interview-type thing, but rather just two people... getting to know each other However, I have met girls who kept talking about themselves and have said they wanted to get to know me better...Chhyeah right. Actions speak louder than words. So, can't tell if he's a player or normal just on that but so far, leaning towards someone who probably doesn't want to know much more about you and might be looking for some fun...
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 If he stressed it after a date, he's probably trying to secure another date. But how did he interact in your previous meetings with him? How many dates have you had and how did they go? Did he talk a lot about himself? Was he flirty/fun? Did he ask a bit about you and seemed intent on listening and did he reciprocate with an answer of his own? Getting to know not only consists of getting to you about you but also how you like to have fun, how your interaction with him would be like. Most importantly, did you have fun? If you did, I would say just go on another date and see how it goes that's if you want to get to know him better. I can speak for myself, when I'm interested in a girl, I would ask about her, she would tell stories... we should share laughs, I should ask follow questions and things will just go from there... Bare in mind, it's not like an interview-type thing, but rather just two people... getting to know each other However, I have met girls who kept talking about themselves and have said they wanted to get to know me better...Chhyeah right. Actions speak louder than words. So, can't tell if he's a player or normal just on that but so far, leaning towards someone who probably doesn't want to know much more about you and might be looking for some fun... We've been on 2 dates. He did ask quite a lot of questions in the beginning and then it was less intense. He would tell me about himself and we would share laughs as we discover common topics/interests. I'm not sure if his way of asking questions is different than what I would have liked. I like a lot of follow up questions to show that the other person was listening.
Eddie Edirol Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 He kept stressing he wants to know me better. However he doesn't ask me a lot about myself. Just telling me that and what plans he has for dates. Normal? Player? Dont worry about it yet, just see if he asks you about you or not. If he doesnt, and talks about himself too much, then you know its just a line. He might not necessarily be a player, just keep that in mind.
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 One thing I like to do is use call-back humour, but that's just me. I would refer back to a story the girl has told me in a previous date and share something that reminded me of it Responses are always good! The girls that I have seen more than once, who have asked me a question that I've answered before, an important one as well, I know haven't really been listening and this usually, IME, correlated with them talking more about themselves and asking very little about me. I can tell you I remember almost everything every girl has told me on every date. I like follow up questions too. Me being the guy who always wants to know the reason behind things and the deeper meaning to things, it's natural and even more so with girls I really want to get to know! I agree with Eddie, just see how it goes! If he keeps talking about himself, or it seems like he's really trying to impress you with his own stories and not really caring about what you have to say, you have your answer.
Pierre Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 BTW, I noted that I have favorite lines that i have used over the years with different women. Sometimes i said them from my heart and sometimes I said them to get an effect. Needy women react hard to those words. Secure women are not impressed by that.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 One thing I like to do is use call-back humour, but that's just me. I would refer back to a story the girl has told me in a previous date and share something that reminded me of it Responses are always good! The girls that I have seen more than once, who have asked me a question that I've answered before, an important one as well, I know haven't really been listening and this usually, IME, correlated with them talking more about themselves and asking very little about me. I can tell you I remember almost everything every girl has told me on every date. I like follow up questions too. Me being the guy who always wants to know the reason behind things and the deeper meaning to things, it's natural and even more so with girls I really want to get to know! I agree with Eddie, just see how it goes! If he keeps talking about himself, or it seems like he's really trying to impress you with his own stories and not really caring about what you have to say, you have your answer. Not at all. He doesn't just talk about himself. It's just that sometimes I feel that he's asking questions to check his boxes to see whether I fit into his life. Instead of follow up questions I would like him to ask. We both like theatre so he suggested going to a play. That's nice. Though I wasn't sure if it was because he wanted to watch it and for someone to go with him.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 BTW, I noted that I have favorite lines that i have used over the years with different women. Sometimes i said them from my heart and sometimes I said them to get an effect. Needy women react hard to those words. Secure women are not impressed by that. What words are they? Any examples?
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 Just enjoy yourself! Have a bit of fun and don't look too much into it! Don't be impress by just all the places he can take you though, which some girls do fall into the trap of. Those dates are you two to interact and get a feel for each other. If he is checking off boxes, then obviously you do fit into his life at the moment and if you like him, that's good! However, I understand that you would like him to follow up with questions. See how it goes - don't overthink it! Pierre, I have in the past used a line or two to get an effect at times too. One of them was, and this was a while a go, "you're really special, you know that?" The girls just melted...
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 Just enjoy yourself! Have a bit of fun and don't look too much into it! Don't be impress by just all the places he can take you though, which some girls do fall into the trap of. Those dates are you two to interact and get a feel for each other. If he is checking off boxes, then obviously you do fit into his life at the moment and if you like him, that's good! However, I understand that you would like him to follow up with questions. See how it goes - don't overthink it! Pierre, I have in the past used a line or two to get an effect at times too. One of them was, and this was a while a go, "you're really special, you know that?" The girls just melted... I'm not sure I like him but I appreciate his wooing. If a guy tells me I'm special soon after we first met, I would think he's a player. Though it also depends on the setting and his tone of voice.
counterman Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 I'm not sure I like him but I appreciate his wooing. If a guy tells me I'm special soon after we first met, I would think he's a player. Though it also depends on the setting and his tone of voice. Least you're enjoying it! And if you feel that you don't want to go any further with him, just be straight up and let him know! Let us know how your next date goes though The threatre sounds great - I haven't been since high school... You're catching on! Ah, some of the things we say... Imagine the most romantic setting you can think of, and the a very smooth, deep voice saying those lines, how can you not fall for that? Literally, when I said it, one of my school crush just went weak... She told all her friends about it and they told me. Anyways, off topic! Enjoy you're date, ma'am.
Pierre Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 What words are they? Any examples? You are the greatest woman I know You are perfect I love hanging out with you How does it feel to be so talented and beautiful at the same time. The list is endless. However, serious women that are not insecure or needy get turned off by those terms. Insecure women gobbled up that stuff. Nevertheless, when I said those words I was talking from my heart 95% of the time because I was enjoying the moment. As a general rule I will not say anything if I feel nothing. However, I recall some exceptions when I said stuff for effect, but I did not feel good about it.
Author caseinpoint Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 You are the greatest woman I know You are perfect I love hanging out with you How does it feel to be so talented and beautiful at the same time. The list is endless. However, serious women that are not insecure or needy get turned off by those terms. Insecure women gobbled up that stuff. Nevertheless, when I said those words I was talking from my heart 95% of the time because I was enjoying the moment. As a general rule I will not say anything if I feel nothing. However, I recall some exceptions when I said stuff for effect, but I did not feel good about it. Of the examples, only "I love hanging out with you" could be taken as possibly real. The others sound lame.
Pierre Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 Of the examples, only "I love hanging out with you" could be taken as possibly real. The others sound lame. Of course they are lame. The effect depends on the recipient. However, I have said lame things when i am smitten.
Eddie Edirol Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 I'm not sure I like him but I appreciate his wooing. If a guy tells me I'm special soon after we first met, I would think he's a player. Though it also depends on the setting and his tone of voice. Well he cant ask you all the questions at once, it would sound like an interrogation. He has to tick off his boxes first, and possibly ask follow up questions at another time to avoid asking too many questions at once. Gotta let the conversation flow, and let the questions get answered during that conversation. Asking too many qualifying questions makes the conversation seemed forced. So he is doing it right. If you want to follow up with further facts about yourself after he asks a question, you should offer up the info instead of waiting for him to ask, and get it out the way. That could keep the conversation flowing more naturally than just fielding questions. You might even have funny stories to add to the answers, and then flip a new question back on him.
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