earthfireuk Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 Hi all, just wondered if I could have some advice. I am feeling so stressed out right now and i just wish I could have some hope. Im 27 years old and have been with my girlfriend for six months. She is 18 years old, so there is quite an age gap between us. Usually I would never consider dating anyone that young but I can honestly say she is the most amazing person I have ever met. We connect absolutley perfectly together in every way and have fallen so deeply in love its amazing I beleive she is my one.We both feel it and its beautiful. Heres the problem. She went to university on Saturday. I helped her pack all her stuff up and drove her up there, dropped her off and now I feel so upset. I have known since we met that this was going to happen but nothing could prepare me for how sad I feel now she has gone. She was living in my village so we have been living so close to each other since we met and have practically spent every possible moment together. It was a given that we would stay together while she is at university as we are both so very much in love. We want a future together. For the past six months though I have been worrying that because of her age that going away to university will change her. It has always been at the back of my mind but now she has left it has moved very much to the forefront. I just want to add that she is very mature for her age and not like any person of her age I have ever met. I have been around the block a bit but have never met anybody like her. Its wonderful The distance isn't too much of a problem because she is only an hour down the road so we will be able to see each other most weekends. I just can't seem to shake the feeling of doubt in my mind that her situation will change her to the point where it will affect how she feels for me. It sounds as if she is having an amazing time now and partying every night. Im just worried that she will see me as part of the boring life she has left behind and change her mind out us. I feel silly as right now i truely beleive and trust that she is completly in love with me as I am her. Its just the age thing thats causing me doubt. Although on the face of it she has never given me any reason to doubt her whatsoever. She has never been a big drinker but is basically living with a load of guys and is now hanging with them all the time and going out with them every night drinking. I know thats the normal thing and she wants to make friends which is great but I just feel really insecure about the whole thing and want to try to find a way to put these silly insecurities to bed. I know I have reason to be wary because of her age but hands down if any girl could give me a reason to trust and beleive in us (our relationship) then she has done it. I just need to sort my head out and find peace with our situation as I really dont want to push her away. So far I have put a brave face on but she knows Im having a hard time. I wanted to ask if anyone else has been in this situation and how is best to handle it? I feel so horrible for doubting her, for doubting us. It just seems like whenever i confided in anyone about my concernes they would kind of lean towards telling me how young she is and not too expect too much. Its really worrying me. Some kind advice would be really appreciated right now. Many thanks for reading.
timmytimmy Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 There is always the possibility she will move on but this is her choice and not under your control. All you can do is make sure you dont push her away because of your insecurities. You are lucky you realize this now. Just be cool and make sure to give her space. If you lose her because of her, it wasnt meant to be but if you lose her because of you, you'll never forgive yourself. Dont make the mistake i did http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t299671/
Author earthfireuk Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 There is always the possibility she will move on but this is her choice and not under your control. All you can do is make sure you dont push her away because of your insecurities. You are lucky you realize this now. Just be cool and make sure to give her space. If you lose her because of her, it wasnt meant to be but if you lose her because of you, you'll never forgive yourself. Dont make the mistake i did http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t299671/ Thanks Timmey. It's so hard not too though. Im trying so hard to just be normal and happy when we speak but its so hard. She can see through it. I am giving her space though which i guess is a good thing. I guess im just finding it hard to adjust from having my girl around me all the time. She never drank much when we were together. didnt go out that often. Only had a couple of male friends and had mostly female ones. Now everything has shifted and she is away, out drinking and parting 24/7 and spending all her time with a load of lads who I have no idea who they are. It really gets my back up. I just feel that if she can change that much in a few days, whats in store for the future :/ Thanks for the advice though Timmy. I read your post and gave you a reply.
timmytimmy Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 No problem. Sorry I cant be of more help. Just try to enjoy yourself like she is doing and keep yourself busy. Only time will tell what can happen between you. Just dont get pushy with her
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