antz2411 Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 We’ve all heard it. Men need female companionship and know a womans love is a wonderful thing. Men also know they are considered desirable in a way as long as they have at least ONE woman.There is no REAL substitute for the love of a woman. All men need it. Men who say they don't are either gay or a ****ing dumbass. Even the guy who's had to lock up his emotions like some rare gold in Fort Knox cuz he has been burned so much will eventually admit he needs a woman's love and companionship. But when do we know whether what we are doing is making us happy, or just creating an illusion that we are? There’s a classic scenario in the dating world that all of us have done once and it comes when we should be saying enough is enough. We get involved with a woman, we become emotionally invested in her, we start to let her become a central figure in our life, sometimes we ignore negatives about her, play them down and we explode the positives.No matter the length of involvement with a woman, at some point in our lives, we have let our feelings take control. They empower us to think differently about situations, and sometimes, that isn’t at all good.When we start giving more than we are given or when we hear “but we can still be friends” we have gone with it. Sometimes, the intoxication of a female around you and the feeling of being content and happy that you believe what she gives you can be so strong that you don’t want to drop it. However, you can feel deep down you aren’t truly satisfied, you feel the hole in your heart and yet you confuse the “female shaped hole” with a “her shaped hole”. You choose to ignore your own values and needs. We all need to remember that we are the PRIZE – the most important thing I forgot that I shouldn’t have forgotten. Apart from family, at no point in your life should you ever place anyone above yourself. This only leads to someone having power over you, and if love is involved, nobody should have to have power over anyone. Girls ask their ex-boyfriends to stay friends after relationships, because it benefits them. It is no longer benefitting you now, is it? What you want is to stay with her, but it hasn’t worked out and she isn’t open for negotiation. But you are so “used” to the feeling of her being around. When you give into another person’s demands, you betray your own values and when you betray those values, the core values that you have throughout your life that sometimes you aren’t even aware exist, you start making yourself unhappy. You value freedom. But the girl you are currently involved with wants you to be there when she calls you; you have to drop what you are doing. You go to her when she calls because you don’t want to upset or disappoint her, but you are ignoring your value and in fact giving her power over you. To put it into perspective, I was recently involved with a female during the summer. Initially she was everything I thought I wanted, I mean this chick from the start accepted me for who I was. I was never scared or worried that im going to offend her with my words or actions. She loved me for me! she gave me something in two months that I wanted from my ex of 3 years could never accomplish doing. however she was emotionally damaged from a previous relationship and I chose to ignore it and so she broke it off before it even started and said she didn’t want to date anyone. The first betrayal of my values came when she asked me to be in a relationship, I should have said “no” for the simple fact I was doing just fine before I met her and loving life. Instead I took the bitch move and succumbed to the illusions she was throwing at me. In the end she broke it off because of a mistake I made 3 times and just completely switched off the kindness and care she was throwing at me and instantly turned cold, I gave more than I was given, she was comfortable and I wasn’t. It was me who had to adjust to her. Fast forward on and the second betrayal of my values came when I wanted to spend time with her to get her back so I personally dropped flowers off at her work and got her a bedroom set and tv for her condo knowing that her heart wont warm up one bit. Went out to dinner with her went back to her condo spent the night and next morning cold again. I got angry, I was hurt and upset but I knew I had no one to blame but myself. every person I was close to said “cut her out”. I did for two days on and off, and then I went back to speaking to her. She was unaware I had even been gone. I had to adjust to her again, I had to accept again. Finally, the last straw came, despite my emotions for her and my feelings, she was never too concerned with involving me in her plans any longer, not even an ounce of effort such as a simple text “ hey hows your day” where she made time for others, she didn’t for me. I said to myself. “Why the **** are you doing this to yourself, what are you looking for, why do you stick around with this chick?” Well, first, I was scared. Scared of not finding a girl like her again but then I realized, I don’t want a girl like this again. I don’t want a girl who doesn’t give a flying **** about me. I don’t want a girl who thinks a pathway through life is to have no attachment whatsoever to any man. I want a girl who I care for and she cares for me, I want a girl who has emotions. I thought if I stay speaking to her and give the image that I am happy, she will eventually say, I am free tomorrow; I will come and see you. I was waiting in hope for her – bitch move. I was under the illusion I was happy with her but I was undermining my values. What I wanted, I wasn’t getting off her and never was going to, and so I left, I deleted her number and told myself **** all this ****. Admittedly me sharing this information to everybody about our situation is immature, but you know what? It’s what I want to do and Im not going to let her affect what I want anymore. So to every dood, when you meet a female or you have been involved with one, remember to never put her above yourself. Never compromise what you want, never compromise your values for hers. If she is not willing to negotiate then you shouldn’t be willing to stick around. With negotiation comes a new value that you will BOTH share. I really have no regrets whatsoever with this chick, no ounce of hatred or animosity, if shes happy with her life then im happy for her, still got nothing but love for her regardless of the hurt she caused me. As long as I know I left her better than when I found her its all good. cuz I damn sure hooked her condo up! haha
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