YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 I'm 29 and he's 22. Like him, but want to hear opinions and thoughts of those who have been in a similar situation or witnessed such a beautiful union/catastrophe. Talk to me!
carhill Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you're not quite Cougartown yet. As far as the potential health of such a union.....unknown. You're unique individuals. If you mesh, you do; if not, not. My best friend had a wife and two daughters by the time he was 22 and now oversees about 55 employees as a business owner and is on the cusp of being a great grandfather. Everyone is an individual.
sweetypielovely Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 im 41 and hes 29 and we have a great relationship...Just depends on the willingness of the people.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 Glad to hear success stories. While I am being told that cougartown is a bit of a hike, the feeling is still there. I'm really used to dating guys a few years older, but that obviously hasn't worked out... We get along very well and have quite a bit of fun together, but I know it takes much more. He's more mature than one would expect, but I notice that people who haven't had a chance to explore so many options before committing to one person tend to have regrets. (Then more regrets later ) But he is sure he is not one of those people .
Professor X Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 He's more mature than one would expect, but I notice that people who haven't had a chance to explore so many options before committing to one person tend to have regrets. (Then more regrets later ) But he is sure he is not one of those people . It's true. How long are you two together? And he can be sure all he wants, life change, people change, he might feel like he's missing out in a year or 2. It happens, more than you think.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 As far as the potential health of such a union.....unknown. You're unique individuals. If you mesh, you do; if not, not. My best friend had a wife and two daughters by the time he was 22 and now oversees about 55 employees as a business owner and is on the cusp of being a great grandfather. Everyone is an individual. You're right about that. I was very surprised to see that we get along so well. He seems pretty dedicated to the idea, yet I am the one who has some doubts. Mostly for logistical reasons... He lives accross town, but does not drive. He does not have a place of his own. I suppose I could sacrifice for a bit as I believe these things would change eventually.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 It's true. How long are you two together? And he can be sure all he wants, life change, people change, he might feel like he's missing out in a year or 2. It happens, more than you think. I told him it happens a lot and he says the life experience he wants involves traveling and experiencing life with a special someone. I told him people often change their minds, but he is adamant. I'm quite analytical, cautious, and thoughtful when it comes to my heart. We are in the process of dating, and have been talking/seeing each other daily since we met about a week ago. Saturday, we spent the night together after watching movies, but didn't have sex and he assured me he would rather wait until I was ready.
carhill Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 Is it normal in your town for people not to drive? For example, San Francisco or Manhattan. Myself, living in a more rural location, was driving by 16 and had three cars by the time I was his age. Not having a car would be significant in my locale but largely irrelevant in the cities I mentioned, as examples. Where does he live? Parents? Roommates? What's his plan for independence and staking out his own 'territory'? What is he willing to do to date you? Take the bus across town, as an example? Ride his bike? Heck, even with three cars, I still rode my bike a lot when his age. Good exercise. If you're both sufficiently compatible and attracted, you'll *both* find a way to make things work. Refrain from treating him like he's a 'boy'. Expect him to be a man. Trust me, his equipment is all man, even though the brain has some developing left to do. Good luck.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 Is it normal in your town for people not to drive? For example, San Francisco or Manhattan. Myself, living in a more rural location, was driving by 16 and had three cars by the time I was his age. Not having a car would be significant in my locale but largely irrelevant in the cities I mentioned, as examples. Where does he live? Parents? Roommates? What's his plan for independence and staking out his own 'territory'? What is he willing to do to date you? Take the bus across town, as an example? Ride his bike? Heck, even with three cars, I still rode my bike a lot when his age. Good exercise. If you're both sufficiently compatible and attracted, you'll *both* find a way to make things work. Refrain from treating him like he's a 'boy'. Expect him to be a man. Trust me, his equipment is all man, even though the brain has some developing left to do. Good luck. We live in a city where public transportation sucks so it's important to have a car. He lives with his parents :-( I did drop him off at the bus stop and he was sorta okay with this. But he told me he would be willing to catch the bus to come and see me if that's what he had to do. The more I answer these questions, the more I realize that he is trying to meet me halfway and that if I have enough patience, we may be able to pull this thing off. I seem to be motivating him to at least work on tactics for his goals.
FrustratedStandards Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 Hunny thats nothing. My parents have a 15 year difference, dad younger, and everyone always comments on how lucky they are to have each other.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 Hunny thats nothing. My parents have a 15 year difference, dad younger, and everyone always comments on how lucky they are to have each other. So now, I have to find a 14 year old? Great. I kid. That's great. Very surprised I don't see any people screaming "DON'T DO IT!!!!" Kind of refreshing-I guess...
carhill Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 The more I answer these questions, the more I realize that he is trying to meet me halfway and that if I have enough patience, we may be able to pull this thing off. Thank our psychologist. The answers are always in the questions.
Author YeahDotDotDot Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 Thank our psychologist. The answers are always in the questions. *Places hands together and bows to you all* You're right, we *BOTH* have to make an effort to compromise. It will be much easier for me when I am completely on board. Slowly, but surely...
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