PrtyGrl81 Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 A little background: I started dating this guy I met online back at the end of July. He's really nice, we have a lot in common, we live close, all that good stuff. We've been on about 8 dates during this time, because we've both been really busy (end of summer vacations, his brother got married, I'm a teacher and this is back to school time which is always very busy) but we've talked at least a couple times every week, either on the phone or by texting. I would say about 70% of the time it is initiated by me. We have not had the "where is this going" talk, although we have chatted about not rushing things and that we both like spending time with each other. He has asked me a couple of times do I like him, since he says he can't really seem to tell. That confuses me, since, like I said, I usually initiate our conversations and I pretty much always agree to meet up with him whenever. We have not done anything physical yet, just hugs, not even a kiss. Anyway, in the past couple of weeks he has seemed to be a little more distant. He rarely texts me anymore, although he always responds when I do, or if I call and leave a message, he calls back. The other day, he did stop by my job to say hi since he was on a different work schedule that day and he passes by my job on the way to his. While there, we chatted about our weekend plans and we loosely agreed that we would maybe hang out on Friday night. Well on Friday I texted him to see if we were still on, and he responded that Friday was no good, but was I free on Saturday instead? I said yes. So the next day I texted him (AGAIN!) to ask if we were still on for that night. He responded that he was suddenly sick in bed but that he did still want to see me later that night. I was out and said I wouldn't be home until later but that I could stop by. He said he would like that and that he would text me later that night. Well, he never did. I assume if he was sick, he could've fallen asleep, but I don't know. And plus it's now a whole day later and I still haven't heard from him. I'm not sure what I should do. Should I be the one to text him again and see if he's all right? Or should I wait for him to text/call? I don't want to come across to desperate/clingy especially since I'm kinda pissed that he hasn't called so I don't want to give in. But then, what if he is really sick and I would come across as selfish/uncaring or whatever for not checking to see how he is? Please help and thanks in advance.
january2011 Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 You said that you could stop by. Why didn't you? There seems to be quite a bit of last minute vague and tentative plan-making via text. How about making more solid plans with specifics and then see if he flakes on those?
sweetypielovely Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 It just seems odd that as many times as you two have hung out that he cant tell you like him. Thats a huge red flag. Maybe he wanted to see if you would keep contacting him if he backed off, but then again you stated that most of the time you initiate things. I know its tempting but wait and see what happens and see if he calls you. If he doesnt after several days, call him. Do not text and tell him youve wondered where hes been. Last you heard he was sick and you were really worried about him. See what he says.
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