Buttercup84 Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 I'm at my friends wedding and while I'm so happy for her I'm also feeling . My ex and I were engaged for a while and we could have had this . It hurts to think he will have this with someone else . The wedding is just bringing up emotions again
lonelynyc Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 I feel your pain. My best friend just got engaged to his girlfriend, and for a while there I thought I'd have the same thing with my ex. It almost felt like a certainty. It's funny how a few months change everything... We'll find love again with better people, and they'll be the ones missing out. Keep your head up, Buttercup.
Author Buttercup84 Posted September 24, 2011 Author Posted September 24, 2011 Thank you so much , sorry about your pain . Just sucks . Can't wait for the reception , im hitting the bar !
lonelynyc Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 Thank you so much , sorry about your pain . Just sucks . Can't wait for the reception , im hitting the bar ! Drink a rum and coke (or several) for me!!!
mike588 Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 You know my story. Several months ago we went to a wedding, a friend of hers got married and it was very nice. Later that night she said to me,, when we get married I want it to be like that. Now this. Unfriggin real!!!!!
M2155 Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 Aww, I went to a wedding a couple weeks ago. They were a beautiful couple and while I was still very emotional, I had to admit to myself my ex-wipe and I did not have what they had for each other, you can just see and feel the love and joy between them. If I had to take something positive, it was that I really want to have what they have. Because if I had, we would still be together for sure.
Mack05 Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 I'm at my friends wedding and while I'm so happy for her I'm also feeling . My ex and I were engaged for a while and we could have had this . It hurts to think he will have this with someone else . The wedding is just bringing up emotions again Buttercup all of us have an idea what we want for an ideal partner. When you say "we could have had this" I just shake my head. I don't know one woman, I have ever met in my life that would want to settle down with.... Had a bit of a temper with me and other people Was impatient with me Family never hugged Would reject me a lot for Sex Would have dumped me if I put on a lot of weight Didn't take me out for dinner because I apparently embarressed him when I didn't finish my meal Didn't like the way I did the dishes Got angry if I stuffed up dinner Hardly went out anymore and spent most of his time playing computer or with his friends Critized me for a lot of things Stopped sending me sms while we were away from eachother Called me a ****ing retard when I misunderstood something once Hardly looked after me when I got sick Signed up to a dating site when we were still together Once got me to call the cops after the neighbours real estate agent came up when I was alone at home - because he complained about our neighbours. He said if I didn't call them I would be against him. I cried down the phone to them. Had porn on his computer and pictures of naked models Said he would break up with me if I broke my iphone Not being there for me after my abortion Taking away my engagement ring after abortion Bitched about me to his friends In the end refused to pick me up late at night from the station because he was tired.. Now if that's the kind of treatment you would like from a life term partner, maybe it's time to go Therapy. So when you say you "could have had this" so you could have had a nice wedding day, a nice honeymoon and maybe a year or two happyness followed by years of emotional abuse and misery. This man would have chipped away at you for years and left you with your self esteem in the total gutter. Your youth gone and options diminished. Judging how you are now, if you married this guy in 10 years time you would be suffering from full blown depression after years of emotional and verbal abuse. That abuse would have got worse and worse. Not only that you could have been raising a child in a broken relationship. No child deserves that. A huge mistake people make is that they focus on the happy times and the good in the person, instead of accepting reality that their ex partner just did not treat them with the respect they deserved. The harsh reality is that your ex did not respect you Buttercup. How could he? You don't even respect yourself..... Your mindset is so negative.. You go out on dates but with completely the wrong attitude. I personally think you should stop dating. It's time to build your self esteem back. This is Paramount. You need to make a pact to yourself that you will NEVER allow a man speak to you like this again. You need to make a pact to yourself that you will NEVER allow a man treat you like this again. The big problem here is you Buttercup. Its time to think outside the box, take a step back from the relatoship. Amazingly you still look for the good in this guy, still blame yourself for the failure of the relationship. Un****ingbelievable. I'm sure you might say "Mack, thanks you are right", but are you going to do something about it Buttercup?. Where is the journal, where is the progress? Even if its slow progress, where is the progress? You post non stop on this site about the same things. How to you ever expect to move on, when you feel so bad about yourself and when your mindset and thoughts are so negative? How much longer are you going to make yourself feel guilty and punish yourself?. And for what! For a man that called you a "****ing retard" and would dump for you the most ridiculous of reasons..You got two choices. Stay feeling sorry for yourself, stay on these forums posting 1000's of similar threads or take control of your life back. It's no longer enough to say "Mack I know". It's time for actions Buttercup..Get back to this girl -> "I have a glow, my eyes sparkle, my hair looks great and I look groomed". You can never be that special girl with him, or staying obsessed with him.. You are a great person Butercup, who deserves so much better then what this guy could ever give you. I find it very sad that you can't see this or want to do anything about it....
Woggle Posted September 24, 2011 Posted September 24, 2011 Chances are they will be divorced in a few years anyway.
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