Work with Ex

[Clarity23]

So I work with my EX. IF you want to see my Original Post it is here:

 

 

But basically long story short. We dated on and off for a year. She was never even my GF. Our total amount of time dating was about 3-4 months. The first time I rejected her and the second and most recent time she rejected me.

 

I've been pretty beat up about it. I want her back. It's been 3 months and I'm still hurt.. She has a new BF Alot of stuff hapened in between which you will see in my Original Post if you want.

 

But basically it really gives me anxiety when I see her at work. I don't like seeing her. We are not on talking terms and just ignore eachother when we pass in the halls.

 

I usually deal with these breakups by having NC but that is really not an option.

 

So anyway, there is a work party this Friday. She will be there. Normally, if I was not in this situation I would go without a doubt. But I am afraid of going and seeing her. I'm afraid I will not have a good time and just be pre occupied with what she is doing. I'm afraid this will set me back.

 

But at same time there are going to be several of these events per year. And some of them I don't have control over going.

 

And after all I do work with her so I am going to have to at least see her once on a daily basis.

 

So what do I do? Do I try and be strong and go but risk having a bad time and setting myself up for disaster? Or do I go, maybe get a chance to talk to her and at least get on good terms since we work together? Or do I just simply not go and wait till the next work event which will be in 3 weeeks?

 

And please no one respond with "Don't ***** where you eat!" I already know this. haha.

 

Thank You!

[Clarity23]

Ooopss

 

Here is the Original Post:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t297681/

[Clarity23]

I think a part of me is also in denial. Like part of me WANTS to see her so to maybe we will talk and I will get some sort of closure out of this or maybe she will see me and her feelings will come back.

 

I dunno what to do here.

[jormungand]

i'm currently in your same situation. it's absolute hell and i can feel my heart sink every time i see her. best of luck

[Clarity23]

So what do you think is the right move here? Be strong and face my fears? Or try to avoid seeing her at all costs?

[jormungand]

if it's anything like what i'm dealing with, she's not gonna talk.

 

most likely she's just being nice to save face and make herself look unaffected. you can either start pretending like it doesn't bother you, or get a new job. i know i'm certainly looking elsewhere, despite how much i don't want to leave. it's the only way we're ever going to heal.

[shortee143]

I dont work with my ex, but we are in the same social crew, and I see him all the time. I even go to the apt he lives in bc he lives with some of my closest friends. It has been hell- but going "nc" really wasn't an option. I coulda- but that would meant giving up doing so many great things with friends. NC is what everyone says, but sometimes it just doesn't work that way for us all. I wont say I went to every event, and sure I questioned when I did go wtf i was doing there, but I went, and I still go. He is even at all our "social gatherings" with his new gf, ouch. It def has prolonged my misery, and yes I did take breaks our 4-6 weeks where I didn't go places where he would be, but then i just realized, as much as I would like to never see him again, it isn't going to happen, he is in my life for the indefinite future. It is not easy still, 6 months later, but I push through it, bc there is no avoiding it. I cant tell you what to do for yourself...but you wont know until you go, and push thru it. Hey, you might be surprised and really proud of yourself. It takes a lot of strength to be in a situation like we are in. But if aren't ready, that is ok too!! Sit this one out, and try again at the next event.