Misar7 Posted September 22, 2011 Posted September 22, 2011 (edited) Well my ex and I were together for 8 yrs. In those 8 yrs we have had a few pregnancies that failed, one where I became severely ill, so ill I lost a crazy amount of weight was not able to stand or walk, from being so malnourished, was in the ER many times. It was horrible and still was not able to bring the baby into the world! I had to get on nerve pills and anit-depressants for awhile after that, he was not there for me at all during any of that time, I even had to pay for all the medical bills! I then had to get off the anti-depressants and went through a year of horrible withdraw effects. Then he cheated on me, but came back with tears and lots of promises and we got engaged, only for him a year later to break it and then pawn the ring. But got back together and things went good for the next few yrs. Well fast forward to now here recently, and I was much healthier and Dr said I could try again, but in mean time he had broken up with me, but then started seeing me again and saying let's try for a baby. I said I wanted to more than anything, but we need to be more stable, he had just started a new job, and I want more of a commitment Marry me already, he is 30 I am 34.But we still slept together and the possibility was there. Well 1 week later, he gets all weird..so basically I find out he is seeing someone, and he lied about it, but finally admitted it! She worked at the gas station near his office where he works, she is 23 little party girl. Then asks me "Are you pregnant?" through txt msg. I say no and that was it he cut me off like I was dead to him. Let me mention that my brother met his sister through us and married her like 6 yrs ago! They all know what he did and how he did it. But my brother is still buds with him, and they all hang out with his new girl who is 8 weeks pregnant..which is exactly how long he has been dating her, so he got her pregnant the first week of seeing her!! So his sister who has been my close friend for yrs, is now her friend they are all posting all over FB about how happy he is now and how excited they all are for the new baby, and congratulating him! I am beyond heart broken, they all know what I went through, and they all know what he did to me. I feel like they have all turned their backs on me and jumped head first into this new girl, who they have known for exactly 8 weeks. I am so hurt by all of it, I don't eat or sleep, I am a mess. They all tell me to get over it. Wow. Then 2 nights ago, the girls dad committed suicide. My brother feels the need to call my dad and tell him..why?! I have no idea. My family and I do not know this girl, but being the type of person I am, I cried for her and prayed for her. Although, she is on FB bragging about getting her ultrasound tomorrow and how great she feels, she has no pregnancy symptoms..while I about died trying to bring a baby into the world! Also mention that she knows about me, and knows the situation. It's not even really just about him, he cheated on me more than once, he was never there for me when I needed him. Now he has gone and done this, which he knows, he knows without a doubt this is tearing me up, cause he knows how much a baby means to me. Just in July I had a new nephew be born, and he said he knows how much I want one, and he promised me we would have one. Not too mention, we had a dog together, I miss her dearly, he has her. Last Friday night I got a txt from him, I have not heard from him in 8 weeks, but I got a txt that just said Hi. I replied who is this? I never got anything back. I guess it was him, maybe it was his gf who did it. Edited September 22, 2011 by Misar7
Author Misar7 Posted September 22, 2011 Author Posted September 22, 2011 (edited) My situation is too messed up to even comment on huh? Help me understand this crazy situation and how to handle it! Edited September 22, 2011 by Misar7
TheDovic Posted September 22, 2011 Posted September 22, 2011 Wow this is really sad, I'm so sorry to hear how badly he's treated you. Almost everyone on this site is seriously suffering, but throw depression into the mix and things go downhill rapidly! When my fiancee dumped me (just over two months ago) I fell into a very deep depression, have been suicidal and have been off work since that point. However I have a message to you on this point, and that is, with the right help things can get better. I have been on anti-depressants for 5 weeks now and have been going to CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) for 3 weeks and in the past two days I have really started to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I am still devastated about my ex, who like yours (although not as extreme or as intentional as yours) did not treat me very well however I can't stop thinking about her / idealising her so I appreciate where you're coming from. I'd love to tell you he was no good for you and you're better off without him, but in reality it's nowhere near that easy. For me, accepting that I'm going to feel this way for the forseeable future has helped me, because how else are we supposed to feel right now? It's ok to be sad. If I can offer any advice it would be to think again about anti-depressants (I'm not sure if they worked for you before, but many don't work for some people, it's all about finding the right one). You could also try CBT, and if you don't want to spend money on therapy buy a CBT book as it can be learned easily. If there's anything else you want to ask just post again on this thread. It's sometimes tough getting replies when you're new to the site but when people start to recognise you they'll help. There are a lot of good people on the forum who like you are really suffering. (ps if that's a pic of you you're very pretty, so get out and find yourself someone who deserves you!)
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