irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 I have to give an example of a familiar face that had just returned to the onlne dating realm. Of course, she was one of many women that I'd emailed in my area, only to never get a response (typical of online dating) She had a typical stock profile, nothing special sounding, did talk about her favorite hobby and how she likes to spend a lot of time with her family and close friends I noticed she had added a special paragraph saying that her experience on the site was not a good one. THat she kept running into men who have no money, no transportation or DL. And other such things. You know ,it's funny, then they come back to the dating site, whining about how they had met all these losers, and then ignore the decent guys like us. She is also seriously limited geographically. So I sometimes think these women really just price themselves out of the market or self-sabotaging their dating experiences, what do you think?
oaks Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 So I sometimes think these women really just price themselves out of the market or self-sabotaging their dating experiences, what do you think? I think that if she fancied you she would've replied to you. I do find that profiles with a long list of issues with previous dates or long lists of "don't contact me if..." to be unattractive, because negativity isn't attractive.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 I think that if she fancied you she would've replied to you. I do find that profiles with a long list of issues with previous dates or long lists of "don't contact me if..." to be unattractive, because negativity isn't attractive. Right, she just fancies loosers <shrug> go figure. As they say, her "picker" is off.
oaks Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Right, she just fancies loosers <shrug> go figure. As they say, her "picker" is off. Is your point that she should like you? Part of your original post got to my brain sounding a bit like "waah waah cute girl didn't mail me back".
AHardDaysNight Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Right, she just fancies loosers <shrug> go figure. As they say, her "picker" is off. She's not entitled to be sexually attracted to you, any more than you are entitled to be sexually attracted to any random girl. That being said, she probably is fishing in the wrong pond. Consider yourself lucky, and move on.
USMCHokie Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 This doesn't surprise me...when women look for only certain attributes, many of which are exclusively physical, they will often find that these men are lacking in other areas that might actually matter. Of course the return "victims" chase after the same thing each time and grow more and more bitter at the process, all the while becoming more "used up." Quite a vicious cycle...
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 This doesn't surprise me...when women look for only certain attributes, many of which are exclusively physical, they will often find that these men are lacking in other areas that might actually matter. Of course the return "victims" chase after the same thing each time and grow more and more bitter at the process, all the while becoming more "used up." Quite a vicious cycle... Yes, there does seem to be a pattern where physically attractive men, seem to be the looser as well, which the case here. So one might have to be a bit lenient in the physical dept. I might add, she lives in a very rural area, and most of the "beautiful" people she seeks are pretty much into their marriage vows. Married long ago back in their early 20s or late teens, typical of small towns. So the left overs is just a bunch of trailer trash, hole -in-the-wall bar flies, served in the county lock-up, or living out of a dumpster.
phineas Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Yes, there does seem to be a pattern where physically attractive men, seem to be the looser as well, which the case here. So one might have to be a bit lenient in the physical dept. Well, the majority of good looking single guys are looser's. The non-looser's either got snatched up, have higher standards or just don't use dating sites.
Casablanca Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 So I sometimes think these women really just price themselves out of the market or self-sabotaging their dating experiences, what do you think? I agree with this, there was a thread asking about what gender overvalues themselves more and I answered, online women, offline men...quite a few agreed with me if I remember correctly
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 Well, the majority of good looking single guys are looser's. The non-looser's either got snatched up, have higher standards or just don't use dating sites. Yeah, that's a good point, I wonder how many people , who are unattached, just don't go to dating sites. I am sure she did, because she's geographically lives in a more rural area., but even those dating sites yield most what I've described above earlier. There was another woman, in the same area, that kept hiding and putting up her profile repeatedly. She had a really long list, due to her "past experiences online" as she put, she had a list of what she wasn't looking for I recall the first few that pretty much eliminated the ENTIRE town she lived in (well just about) It was a long "Do not contact me if..." list Something about, "If you're holding a dead animal in your picture", you have a felony record, like NASCAR, have a beer in your hand in ever picture, " The first part of her list sounded more like a spin off of the "You might be a redneck..." She pretty much eliminated all her options in just the first part of that list. LOL Suggestion to her 1. Relocate 2. Stay single forever.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 I agree with this, there was a thread asking about what gender overvalues themselves more and I answered, online women, offline men...quite a few agreed with me if I remember correctly Right, and limiting themselves geographically, just makes it worse 2 fold
phineas Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Yeah, that's a good point, I wonder how many people , who are unattached, just don't go to dating sites. I am sure she did, because she's geographically lives in a more rural area., but even those dating sites yield most what I've described above earlier. There was another woman, in the same area, that kept hiding and putting up her profile repeatedly. She had a really long list, due to her "past experiences online" as she put, she had a list of what she wasn't looking for I recall the first few that pretty much eliminated the ENTIRE town she lived in (well just about) It was a long "Do not contact me if..." list Something about, "If you're holding a dead animal in your picture", you have a felony record, like NASCAR, have a beer in your hand in ever picture, " The first part of her list sounded more like a spin off of the "You might be a redneck..." She pretty much eliminated all her options in just the first part of that list. LOL Suggestion to her 1. Relocate 2. Stay single forever. I joined POF Last summer. I was waiting for my divorce to be final so I kept my profile hidden. Last sept when i got divorced I un-hid it for a week the promptly hid it. Trainwreck central! I really looked at again last week. Literally the same women still checking in regularly from the previous year. Seriously? Makes me want to just delete my profile & try match.
oaks Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Literally the same women still checking in regularly from the previous year. Seriously? Newsflash! Some women who were single last year are single now. Film at 11! So... they (presumably) aren't currently in a relationship. So what? Maybe they've been single all year with no dates, maybe they've dated some guys but not found anyone special. Maybe they've had a 'relationship' but it ended. You won't notice the women who aren't there any more, some of whom will be in relationships.
Calutaxi484 Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Newsflash! Some women who were single last year are single now. Film at 11! So... they (presumably) aren't currently in a relationship. So what? Maybe they've been single all year with no dates, maybe they've dated some guys but not found anyone special. Maybe they've had a 'relationship' but it ended. You won't notice the women who aren't there any more, some of whom will be in relationships. I think his point was more that these women keep saying " I don't want a loser" but repeatedly go for the same type of guys. I actually have a PoF account too. I generally use it as a way to pass the time, I don't think I've actually ever met anyone from there. I'm a good looking guy with my act together, and still I'd say most of my emails aren't answered. Usually I actually read the profile and talk about something in there. I'd say I get 1, maybe 2 responses out of 5 emails I send out. Out of the emails I do get back I'd say I'm lucky if 1 in 3 actually has something I'm able to respond to. So OP don't get too bent out of shape about it, that's just how those places are. Also I generally don't answer emails that are like " Hi", "Hey what's up", or "We should chat" so you can't really expect a woman to answer something like that either.
phineas Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Newsflash! Some women who were single last year are single now. Film at 11! So... they (presumably) aren't currently in a relationship. So what? Maybe they've been single all year with no dates, maybe they've dated some guys but not found anyone special. Maybe they've had a 'relationship' but it ended. You won't notice the women who aren't there any more, some of whom will be in relationships. I think his point was more that these women keep saying " I don't want a loser" but repeatedly go for the same type of guys. I actually have a PoF account too. I generally use it as a way to pass the time, I don't think I've actually ever met anyone from there. I'm a good looking guy with my act together, and still I'd say most of my emails aren't answered. Usually I actually read the profile and talk about something in there. I'd say I get 1, maybe 2 responses out of 5 emails I send out. Out of the emails I do get back I'd say I'm lucky if 1 in 3 actually has something I'm able to respond to. So OP don't get too bent out of shape about it, that's just how those places are. Also I generally don't answer emails that are like " Hi", "Hey what's up", or "We should chat" so you can't really expect a woman to answer something like that either. Yeah, I referring to the type irc333 was talking about when I said trainwreck central. It's a major turn-off to see such negativity online.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 (edited) I think his point was more that these women keep saying " I don't want a loser" but repeatedly go for the same type of guys. . Right, and the return users start to turn their profile into a friggin' BLOG expressing their dissatisfaction at the results that they've gotten. One even was whining, saying, "I don't know why I'm on here, but how else am I suppose to meet someone?" She even said, "Yeah, I was here before guys, so here I am again" and soemthing about how she tried meeting people in the real world, only to come across men barely legal drinking age hitting on her. She's a 35 year old waitress, of course men are going to hit on her, most of the patrons are college aged. Of course, I wouldn't doubt she's the only middle-aged Chocski's-type waitress, (see Office Space) in the joint. Anyway, she seemed completely disappointed at this point, but if you're at the point where you're whining about it in your profile, it's time to relocate (which is probably hard for some to do), or just consider self unattached...or hope someone NEW drifts into town. I think another woman added something like "Quit getting on my case about how picky I am, I know what I want and I won't settle!!" It's amusing seeing these ladies, pop up at random in my margins as MY profile having been viewed by them.....so I would, get a chuckle , checking back to see what zaniness they added to their profile. LOL Edited September 18, 2011 by irc333
oaks Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 So, why do you care about these negative people or what they write in their profiles?
FitChick Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 I don't understand lazy daters who live in an area where there is no one desirable and they can't be bothered to look further afield. People have found their soulmates across the globe. Those are the ones who are serious about finding true love and not just getting laid.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 So, why do you care about these negative people or what they write in their profiles? Why do you care to know what I care about? I just enjoy starting topics about this, just the same way other people start topics in here.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 I don't understand lazy daters who live in an area where there is no one desirable and they can't be bothered to look further afield. People have found their soulmates across the globe. Those are the ones who are serious about finding true love and not just getting laid. I've met people like this, not only they were lazy daters, but even to lazy about making new friends. A MARRIED friend of mine invited me out, and a couple of his female single friends to an area they don't typically frequent that THEY thought was a little too far for them to explore, like 45 mins to an hrs drive. Of course, HE drove....(yep, they were just passengers, thus lazy) He calls me up and tells me of these ladies that were coming. These mid 30's - 40's single women hardly ever explored outside their "Fishbowl" community to even make new friends They were content with the friends they grew up with in Highschool and are still hanging out with them, otherwise they are just hanging out with their family . They weren't much for being open minded. BUT, my friend was able to drag them out of their small "Hazzard County" region to an area for some wine tasting amongst other friends he had in a larger city. The 2 women he brought with them, pretty much stayed to themselves, he introduced me to them, I chatted with them for a bit....then I asked if they had mingled or talked to anyone else. So I was the only one that talked with them. No joke, one of them said, "We're not much into making new friends" I almost had to ask a 2nd time what she said, but it was clear, they were both content hanging out with their 40-something highschool buddies and nothing more. They even bailed early and asked their male friend to take them "somewhere" less boring for some dancing. I was looking around for them When I got home, I messaged him on FB and asked where'd they take off to. And he said, they wanted to go out dancing, and I said, "Oh, really? And ya didn't think to tell me?" And he said, "I did ask them if irc333 could come along, and they said no" (yeah, cold, eh? LOL) Apparently, I would take them wanting to join them for some club hopping the wrong way. Basically, they were snobs and had nothing to do with bringing new people into their life. They went back home, after that, they had no enthusiasm for venturing into the big city a mere hour away.
motive2002 Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Well, I'll be honest. Distance can be a factor when you consider how much THE PRICE OF GASOLINE is lately.. lol OP here's what you do: Shrug and laugh it off. If she's being fussy and then gets disappointed, it's not your problem. Here's what you don't do: Get all butthurt because said chick didn't reply to you or find you attractive. Just move on, or better yet meet some chicks in real life. Online dating is kind of a joke for guys, unless they are rich and look like Adonis.
country_gurl Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 You know ,it's funny, then they come back to the dating site, whining about how they had met all these losers, and then ignore the decent guys like us. I think you sound bitter that these women whose profiles you've clearly seemed to have memorized (that's kinda bizarre, no?), have not either initiated or reciprocated any interest and it's easier for you to accuse them of having something wrong with them (too negative, too picky, an alleged penchant for what you deem to be lOsers, etc) as opposed to considering that perhaps you're just not all that you think you're cracked up to be? And just because you consider yourself to be decent, that doesn't mean it's true. And just become someone is a "nice guy" that doesn't mean that women have something fundamentally wrong with themselves for not snapping up Mr Nice Guy. Your post just sounds to me like the typical nice guy whine-fest, IMO.
oaks Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Why do you care to know what I care about? I just enjoy starting topics about this, just the same way other people start topics in here. Because I'm bored of reading self-indulgent, destructive, bitchy whine-fests on here about why women on dating sites have their sights set incorrectly, where "incorrectly" means "she didn't pick me", and your topic reminded me somewhat of that. Sorry, I'm being grumpy today.
Author irc333 Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 True, online dating is a joke actually if you think about it. I have been mixing it up with real life social functions though. Actually had better luck at those. Well, I'll be honest. Distance can be a factor when you consider how much THE PRICE OF GASOLINE is lately.. lol OP here's what you do: Shrug and laugh it off. If she's being fussy and then gets disappointed, it's not your problem. Here's what you don't do: Get all butthurt because said chick didn't reply to you or find you attractive. Just move on, or better yet meet some chicks in real life. Online dating is kind of a joke for guys, unless they are rich and look like Adonis.
D-Lish Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Some of the men on the dating sites have been on there forever- but with the same pictures from 5 years ago!! I've only met 2 people I liked from POF in 5 years!
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