safetyv Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 i havent spoken to my ex in almost three weeks (we agreed to go no contact) but before we went no contact -she cried during deep and meaningfuls.... -told me she has feelings.... -kissed me (about an hour after we decided to go nc) -we spooned and held each other (also after we decided to go nc) -she hasnt been with anyone else, even kissed another guy -when we hung out she was very flirty... ***however*** -she also told me she didnt want to get back together because "we just broke up, and i dont wanna make things worse" -she got angry at me from time to time (usually when we hung out and i was needy or boring) -she was very hot and cold, some days she was fun and flirty, some days she didnt even want to talk. -her idea of going no contact is that we will be "just friends" afterward im going crazy because i feel like she is showing subconcious signs that she wants me, but she tells me she doesnt, and on top of that i havent spoken to her in three weeks!!! i feel like im running out of time!
silly_panda Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Hmm... If she wants back then she will tell you and get back with you... There is no such thing as don't wanna get back together cause you two just broke up... Doesn't make sense to me... Anyway... Don't be her friend rite now cause it will just hurt you more... You both had agreed on going NC... Stick to it...
Author safetyv Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 i think she is scared i will hurt her.... i am the one who broke up with her
silly_panda Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Oh... You are the one that broke up with her..? Then I think it's a bit different now... Here are a few questions for you then... Why did you break up with her..? Do you really wan her back..? Do you think it will work out if you both get back together..? Are you both able to fix the problem (if any) in your previous relationship to make it work this time around..? If you really wan her back, you gotta tell her... Let her know... You are the one that broke up with her... You can't expect her to come chasing after you... You gotta do the chasing now... You owe her that much... If you did told her that you wanna get back together, then by her saying you both just broke up makes more sense now (sorry for what I said in my previous post)... Yea... She is scared of putting her heart out there again... Well... At this point you just gotta regain her trust... And that won't be easy and you got lots of work to do... I hope you do get your second chance... Keep us updated...
NordicStripes Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 I agree with silly panda. I'm a bit in the same situation. My ex broke up with me, and now wants me back. Even though I still love him (and we even kissed last week), I won't just take him back. He'll have to work hard and earn my trust again. I want to make sure he won't just go and break my heart again.
Author safetyv Posted September 18, 2011 Author Posted September 18, 2011 i broke up with her because i was bored... it was a horrible thing for me to do and i completely betrayed her trust. but yes i have told her i want her back. the reason i was bored was because i felt the relationship really wasnt going anywhere (we had no plans for the future) but i didnt really understand that properly until now. silly huh? i have never made sucha big mistake in my life... whats worse is she asked me to take her back, i did, and then broke up with her again a few weeks later (i still wasnt even trying to work through it) and we continued to have sex for a month after that. god now im writing it down i feel like such a jerk. but i have made my feelings clear and apologised with complete sincerity. so this whole breakup process has lasted about three and a half months now. i havent kissed or slept with anyone else. im hoping that i can prove to her that she can trust me. i really dont want anybody else.
silly_panda Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Alrite... Glad to know that you are aware of your mistake... But what makes you think that you won't feel bored again when you get back together..? Or are you just afraid of losing someone..? Sorry that I ask this... I just don't wan the same thing to happen and both of you getting hurt again... In my humble opinion, the 'bored' feeling only comes when one or both party do not put effort to spark the relationship and make it fun... Anyway... Now you wan her back rite..? Call her... Get in touch with her... Tell her your feelings and you wanna get back... Don't give her any pressure... Just be there for her and be yourself... It really takes time and patience to get your ex back...
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