browneyes Posted May 10, 2004 Posted May 10, 2004 I recently ran into a old friend that I have had feeling for in the past. We have been talking back and forth on the phone for the past 3 months. We finally got together for a few drinks the other night and to catch up on what we have been doing the past year. My friend out of the blue starts telling me that he has always liked me and that he would like more than just a friendship. Well we ended the night he told me that he would give me a call and I havent heard from him since. what do I do? Do I call ? I am confused?
Author browneyes Posted May 10, 2004 Author Posted May 10, 2004 Originally posted by browneyes I recently ran into a old friend that I have had feeling for in the past. We have been talking back and forth on the phone for the past 3 months. We finally got together for a few drinks the other night and to catch up on what we have been doing the past year. My friend out of the blue starts telling me that he has always liked me and that he would like more than just a friendship. Well we ended the night he told me that he would give me a call and I havent heard from him since. what do I do? Do I call ? I am confused?
WWDDFD Posted May 10, 2004 Posted May 10, 2004 Go ahead. He may be scared and thinks that you're not interested. If you are, go for it!
Diva Posted May 11, 2004 Posted May 11, 2004 I don't know. I don't think I would call. If you gave him your number and made it clear that it would be cool if he called you and he doesn't, he probably has his own issues and calling him will probably make him back away more. If he's really interested, he will eventually call. Some guys take a while. I am going through a similar thing right now. Met this guy, we both perform at this club but on different nights (he's a comedian/improv actor, I sing in a show there), we have met up after our shows a few times, had drinks, etc. He says he really wants to go out to dinner and takes my number. He calls, but doesn't commit to a day or time and says he'll call me later in the week to arrange a date. That was over a week ago and I still haven't heard from him. It's hard not to sit around trying to decipher his actions and what they mean. Did he meet someone else? Did I say something wrong? Did he fall off a cliff? But I've been around enough to know that for some reason guys do this. I try not to take it personally, though it's hard. Sometimes they get unsure and procrastinate, sometimes, who knows? Some insight from the guys would be nice. Have you ever told a girl you would call and then didn't? Why? Please clue us in.
WWDDFD Posted May 11, 2004 Posted May 11, 2004 Originally posted by Diva Have you ever told a girl you would call and then didn't? Why? Please clue us in. Because we get the signal sometimes that you're just not interested in us, so why should be bother calling!!! "Hard to get" turns some guys off!
NatoPMT Posted May 11, 2004 Posted May 11, 2004 yes - call him. if you didnt give him the same enthusiasm back for whatever reason, he might be mildly embarrassed he told you what he did. if you did, you'll not find out whats happening until you call him. at the start of a relationship, sometimes id rather not bother starting at all, if you arent that involved, its easier to walk away than to stir up intense feelings. I felt like that at the start of my relationship, my bf told me recently hed felt like that too - and some of my friends agree. hes made the first move, you make the 2nd
dudesomewhere Posted May 11, 2004 Posted May 11, 2004 Originally posted by WWDDFD Because we get the signal sometimes that you're just not interested in us, so why should be bother calling!!! "Hard to get" turns some guys off! First off let me say I've always called when I said I would but I usually don't if someoen tries to get me to call, then I'll just say I will and not. However, back on track, women seem very shocked when I do call them, because I will call them the following day. I'm one of those weirdos that don't play games. Of course, as WWDDFD states it, hard to get turns me off completely. In my view, when a guy doesn't play games and you do, it's over. Nothing more annoying though when the "hard to get" starts "liking" you more.
Author browneyes Posted May 11, 2004 Author Posted May 11, 2004 Originally posted by BigBelm yes - call him. if you didnt give him the same enthusiasm back for whatever reason, he might be mildly embarrassed he told you what he did. if you did, you'll not find out whats happening until you call him. at the start of a relationship, sometimes id rather not bother starting at all, if you arent that involved, its easier to walk away than to stir up intense feelings. I felt like that at the start of my relationship, my bf told me recently hed felt like that too - and some of my friends agree. hes made the first move, you make the 2nd So lets see I make the 2nd move, how do i break the ice if he hasent called by now? Do you think that may be he is hiding something? A Girlfriend? But I guess that you only live once and you should never live in regret. Right?
Gemini84 Posted May 11, 2004 Posted May 11, 2004 If you want more than friends with him call him. Maybe hes just waiting on you to make the move. He left it for you to decided friendship or more than just friends. And he could be afraid to call you because he doesn't know how you feel.
Author browneyes Posted May 11, 2004 Author Posted May 11, 2004 Originally posted by Gemini84 If you want more than friends with him call him. Maybe hes just waiting on you to make the move. He left it for you to decided friendship or more than just friends. And he could be afraid to call you because he doesn't know how you feel. Well let say I call and confess that I am interested in more than just a friendship, am I coming on to strong? will I scare him off? I know that he made the intial move, but some people are weird expressions of feelings.
Diva Posted May 12, 2004 Posted May 12, 2004 Originally posted by WWDDFD Because we get the signal sometimes that you're just not interested in us, so why should be bother calling!!! "Hard to get" turns some guys off! Umm...yeah, I understand that can be the case sometimes, but that's not what I was talking about. I've never played hard to get with this guy, I've showed up at his show a couple times and made it clear I would be happy to go to dinner with him as soon as he mentioned it. And it's not like he said, "Maybe I'll call you sometime." It was specifically, "I'll call you before the end of the week so we can go to dinner this weekend." And then nothing. That's what I don't get. And it's not the first time this has happened to me.
Author browneyes Posted May 12, 2004 Author Posted May 12, 2004 Originally posted by clia How long has it been since he said he'd call? It has been 4 days I know its not that long but if you say your going to call then call. I gave in though and called tonight and no answer, but I left a message: Saying that I was really unable to sit and talk since all of our friends were around and if he would like to get together and reminisce. Sound good? or did I completely make a fool out of myself? But you should never live in regret, so if he calls then he calls and if he doesn't then I know that he was just blowing smoke up my a**. I am still really frustrated.
Diva Posted May 12, 2004 Posted May 12, 2004 Originally posted by browneyes It has been 4 days I know its not that long but if you say your going to call then call. I gave in though and called tonight and no answer, but I left a message: Saying that I was really unable to sit and talk since all of our friends were around and if he would like to get together and reminisce. Sound good? or did I completely make a fool out of myself? But you should never live in regret, so if he calls then he calls and if he doesn't then I know that he was just blowing smoke up my a**. I am still really frustrated. I wouldn't worry about it. It's a tough situation and I can't say what's the right or wrong answer. If he's a decent guy he will most likely call you back. If he doesn't call, then I would write him off, you've made your feelings pretty clear. I totally agree with what you said. If you say you are going to call, then call. I have no problem calling a guy if that's what we agreed to, but if he specifically said he would call you, and then doesn't, it makes you think he's either unreliable, doesn't care about your feelings or playing games. P.S. Don't be fooled by my screenname into thinking that means I expect princess treatment or anything, it's totally in jest due to the fact that I sing and act but I am very much NOT the Diva. Anyone who knows me will tell you I am a very low-maintenance person.
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