downriver Posted September 17, 2011 Posted September 17, 2011 (edited) Hi everyone =] I am fairly new here and I apologize in advance if it seems that I do not follow the norms of this forum. I just said goodbye to my girlfriend a couple of hours ago because she's leaving for another year of college. She goes to UCSD and I go to a community college back at home as a transfer student. We'll be 8 hours apart from each other. It'll be her sophomore year, and it will be mine as well. The reason why I want to post this thread is to seek support and perhaps hear other people's stories of their experience with long-distance relationships. My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over 21 months now, since our senior year in high school. We first met in our Choir class and quickly became friends. Then eventually, things led to other things and we began dating. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me, and she feels the same way. We've pulled through our first year of college in a LDR or 8-9 months to be specific. It was difficult, but it's matured us for the better. We're stronger and closer than ever, especially after this summer. We had our ups and downs, breaks and breakups, but our love is strong for one another. We always talk about living together in the future, travelling together, and even marriage. Only my girlfriend brings up the marriage part though, and honestly, that doesn't scare me despite the fact that she's the first long-term girlfriend I've had. I'm her second long-term. It's funny because we always hear or read that we're too young to be thinking about this stuff, but we have our priorities in check. We've been supportive of each other's academic goals and life endeavors. Spending time with each other ticks the clock away for the both of us, it's amazing. But to the point, I miss her terribly. I know she misses me too, and she's reassured me that we'll be just fine because we've already gone through LD for a year already and we know what to expect. However, it'll be harder this time because she's planning on checking out sororities and putting herself out in the college scene. She's not a party girl though, despite her incredible tolerance for alcohol. I don't have any trust issues about that, because I fully support her decisions. I just don't know what to do to cope with the sadness and loneliness of being back home, while she's having the University life. I'm more vulnerable to becoming clingy because of my position. I've told her my feelings and everything, and she feels the same way. We comfort each other and keep each other positive. Any advice or support will be appreciated. This relationship that I'm in is quite incredible. =] Edited September 17, 2011 by downriver
2penguins Posted September 17, 2011 Posted September 17, 2011 I am shocked to read this-only because I am in the same situation as you! A strong powerful love separated by college-even though we have done LDR for a year...
BiCoastalLove Posted September 17, 2011 Posted September 17, 2011 Kudos to you both. I admire your strength. I have only been in an LDR for 6 weeks. I am feeling a bit of hope though as we are getting into a groove on communication. I feel like we have had a lot of fights the last few weeks but now we are both on the same page and headed towards happiness. Every day, every hour is a marathon. I also have been separated by graduate school and we hope to be together next summer. So I feel your pain. But just thought I would share a little happiness.. Good luck.
englishboy Posted September 18, 2011 Posted September 18, 2011 Nice to hear your story. I have been in a LDR for just over 2 years and my girlfriend in college in America. I have had to deal with the same things that you describe. I find it harder and i get more lonely etc when I don't have many things planned in my day. I work in the day but find when i go to the gym, carry on going out with friends etc in the evening I think about it less. Its not that i think about her less because we still message each other and have a skype date most evenings, but I don't sit around and feel lonely or sorry for myself then. I think you both have need to have a real understanding of what you are and what you expect of each other. It sounds basic but if you both speak about it and know what to expect, it avoids any potential problems. Even if you've never had any issues it lets you both know where you stand and could help prevent a problem you won't need to have. Best of luck to the both of you
Recommended Posts