I could use some insight.

[aliasbk]

So everything has been going absolutely great with my girl and I for the past 6 months. About a 2 weeks ago we got into an argument, our first, at work and i yelled at her a little bit. the whole thing lasted about 20 seconds. We work directly together, but i've only talked to her for about 15 mins total since it happened.

 

At the end of the day when i saw her again I apologized. She said its ok, she'd deal with it. I really hurt her feelings, she said she never thought I'd argue with her like that. She sent me a text later and told me how much she cares about me and knows i feel the same. She said she new i was upset and wasn't trying to be mean to her.

 

She was in an abusive relationship about 6-8 months before we started seeing each other. So its been about at year since she's been with him. I assume it hurt her even more due to the issues she had before. Anyway she said she needed a couple of days, so i gave it to her. I asked her how she was and stuff after that, she then sent me a text saying she couldn't be in a relationship with me right now, she was having a hard time.

 

Hearing this absolutely crushed me. again she gave the whole i care for you and miss you along with that. The next week at work everything was normal. she was acting like nothing happened, nothing was wrong, and talked and acted like she did prior to the fight. Other than the 15 mins or so of banter at work there has been NC since the day or so after. i want to give her a little space and time to decompress, but i want to know what the chances are. Not knowing anything is killing me and i don't want to push the matter to much. i don't want to push her away.

 

It hurts thinking everything is OK with her and she doesn't care, it hurts that she said she cared for me so much over the past 6 months then threw it away over one bump in the road. Any advice as to what i can do, say, not do? I want to ask her to lunch or somewhere to talk and try and figure this all out but i dont know if it will make it worse or not, how long should i wait? How do i give her space and make her feel special and know i still care about her?

 

Thanks

[TheDovic]

This is a tough one, but it's positive that she's still speaking to you! SHE needs to learn to trust you again, but YOU can't end up in the "friend zone" which is where you're heading at the moment!

 

You need to go online, read articles on how to avoid the friend zone and stick to this advice. Also read David DeAngelo's "Attraction isn't a Choice." Best relationship book I've ever read and isn't full of over confident **** that the average guy can't put into action. Really simply tells you how to behave around women you like to attract them, whilst being yourself... Brilliant!

[aliasbk]

Thanks TheDovic, i don't want to end up in the friend zone. honestly i don't think i could do it. The hard part is not knowing if she'll still see me the way she once did.