mantics Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Met a guy and went out on a date. He's a great guy but the fact that he's shorter than me is really getting to me. He's also smaller than me in frame. Now im not a big girl, im actually very thin and im not insecure at all but it just doesnt feel right. Also I just got out of a relationship not that long ago (about 2 weeks) and I guess I just wanted a man's attention. After one date Im just thinking maybe this was a mistake especially since this guy really likes me and is ready for a relationship. He's so sweet and after thinking about it I dont want to get his hopes up when I don't even know what I want myself. Any advice please?
plowguy1 Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Im thinkin just like every other non fat girl, you want a big guy.
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Met a guy and went out on a date. He's a great guy but the fact that he's shorter than me is really getting to me. He's also smaller than me in frame. Now im not a big girl, im actually very thin and im not insecure at all but it just doesnt feel right. What's your height and weight, or if you don't want to divulge your own size, what's his height and weight?
Wolf18 Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Hey Mantics, I think we've met before. Are you able to shape shift, because I'm pretty sure I've dated you on 9 different occasions.
mitchell Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 How was the sex after your date? As long as the size difference doesn't interfere with your sexual satisfaction, I say keep dating him if he seems like a good guy.
Author mantics Posted September 14, 2011 Author Posted September 14, 2011 I'm 5'7" and about 140 lbs. Mostly muscle since Im an athlete and Im definitely thicker (I am a black woman) but I like that about myself. He's 5'6" (i know its only one inch) but his smaller frame is what bothers me the most. I dont care what other people think. This is about me. I date only white men and I''m used to people staring because they think its weird. I also prefer skinnier men but usually taller. I know this whole thing seems shallow. But I think the fact that it's coupled with my recent breakup, its making me think me than usual. My ex broke my heart unexpectedly and I still have feelings for him. Not to mention he's decided that Im his best friend and wants to call me everyday. I wanted to feel needed by another man because I thought that would help me but now I realize that was extremely selfish and I don't want to hurt anyone.
Author mantics Posted September 14, 2011 Author Posted September 14, 2011 How was the sex after your date? As long as the size difference doesn't interfere with your sexual satisfaction, I say keep dating him if he seems like a good guy. We didn't have sex. It was a first date.
Cracker Jack Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Yeah, you're not all that attracted to him, then. Be honest with him. I understand you don't want to hurt him, but you're clearly not into him. Don't go on anymore dates with the guy.
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 I'm 5'7" and about 140 lbs. Mostly muscle since Im an athlete and Im definitely thicker (I am a black woman) but I like that about myself. He's 5'6" (i know its only one inch) but his smaller frame is what bothers me the most. I dont care what other people think. This is about me. I date only white men and I''m used to people staring because they think its weird. I also prefer skinnier men but usually taller. You should stop seeing him and cite not being over your ex as the reason. Since you're also less attracted to shorter guys, be firm that you're not ready and leave no hope for future dates if he says something like he's willing to wait for you.
OnyxSnowfall Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 If you're unsure of what you want, you should let him know. Sometimes we have to hurt people, and sometimes it's in their best interest if we do (when it will save them from a deeper and more intense hurt). Tell him that you just got out of a relationship and you're just seeking light-hearted things for now (that you're not ready for a serious relationship yet and are trying to rediscover yourself and what you want from life). As far as height/frame goes... in my experience, I've never been able to be sexually attracted to short men --- even if they're great people. It is what it is. I've learned not to try to overlook it because I just can't and it made things worse than just initially and flat out rejecting them. But you'll never know if it's something you can overlook or not until you risk trampling on some poor heart first =( ... I would say just follow your instincts and avoid all that, 'cause I trampled a couple before I was willing to admit it to myself but, risks are risks. Perhaps bring that concern up with them and allow them to decide if they're willing to proceed with such an uncertainty (chances are it will bring out an insecurity that will make them more unattractive though =/) Good luck.
Badsingularity Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Doesn't sound like your too in to him and you know it. Do you and him both a favor and gently let him go.
Yamaha Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 he's shorter than me You picked the wrong thing to point out OP. Sensitive subject for many men on this forum.... just sayin
rafallus Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 After one date Im just thinking maybe this was a mistake especially since this guy really likes me and is ready for a relationship. He's so sweet and after thinking about it I dont want to get his hopes up when I don't even know what I want myself. Screw being short and small frame, he's clearly coming on too strong.
PJKino Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Be honest with him, as a short guy ive come to grips with height probably being the most important thing to women Guy can be great in every other area but because hes short hes dismissed Hope these tall guys all women worship and hold out for are worth it in the end
omkara Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 So, I hear short men have abnormally large penises. Should I be jealous?
Thornton Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 I'm not attracted to shorter men or men who weigh less than me. I really don't understand what the problem is. You're not attracted to the guy, so cut him loose - end of story.
carhill Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 I know there's some advice in there somewhere.
omkara Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 It means you should never trust women, because deep down inside they're all Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Cracker Jack Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Let's see if we can surpass the two week barrier....
carhill Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 It means you should never trust women, because deep down inside they're all Arnold Schwarzenegger. If only their acting could be as bad
omkara Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 If only their acting could be as bad Ooooooh!
Elysian Powder Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Met a guy and went out on a date. He's a great guy but the fact that he's shorter than me is really getting to me. He's also smaller than me in frame. Now im not a big girl, im actually very thin and im not insecure at all but it just doesnt feel right. Also I just got out of a relationship not that long ago (about 2 weeks) and I guess I just wanted a man's attention. After one date Im just thinking maybe this was a mistake especially since this guy really likes me and is ready for a relationship. He's so sweet and after thinking about it I dont want to get his hopes up when I don't even know what I want myself. Any advice please? Keep him as your best male friend and go fck a manly man; it's in your nature to want a real man, but that guy you're with now can never provoke a sexual response out of you. Don't worry about how he feels.He's used(and if not, he'll grow used to it) to being second/third choice. Also, don't concern yourself with a preconception of using him. Plenty - maybe all women - don't date sub -par men, so it's all good. Have fun.
OnyxSnowfall Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Keep him as your best male friend and go fck a manly man; it's in your nature to want a real man, but that guy you're with now can never provoke a sexual response out of you. Don't worry about how he feels.He's used(and if not, he'll grow used to it) to being second/third choice. Also, don't concern yourself with a preconception of using him. Plenty - maybe all women - do that, they don't date girly men; so it's all good. Have fun. :lmao:... Finkleeeeeeeee. Etc. It's all good...
Elysian Powder Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 :lmao:... Finkleeeeeeeee. Etc. It's all good... OK, Bro. It made sense.
carhill Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 OP, seriously, you're likely rebounding after only two weeks out and this guy doesn't sound attractive to you. My advice to you is, if you're going to rebound, do it with someone who rocks your world. Blows your mind. Destroys your loins. Seriously. You'll forget all about your ex and, barring any psychological issues on your part which facilitated the demise of the last relationship, leave you cleansed and ready for your next run.
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