geegirl Posted September 25, 2011 Posted September 25, 2011 You're doing great H! You're starting to see the games. I'm sorry for being harsh but know it was never meant to hurt your feelings but to jolt you into seeing things for what they are.
Author headsashed Posted September 25, 2011 Author Posted September 25, 2011 let her play games,cos shes on her own now lol,gets boring playing them on your own doesnt it? i cant and wont let myself fall for her bullcrap anymore. i love her ofcourse but i deserve so much better,even i know that now only 1 thing that does bother me and i know i need to stop thinking about it is why after 2 years did she suddenly say and do the things she did and still act like she has,its messed up,like her head,hope she suffers like i have now im gone wow,so much anger coming out of me haha,suppose its a good thing
geegirl Posted September 25, 2011 Posted September 25, 2011 Anger is a good thing! You will go up and down but stay the course. She will always be her messed up self. You won't be able to find the answers. You on the other hand will be able to move onto bigger and better. Keep the focus on you.
Author headsashed Posted September 25, 2011 Author Posted September 25, 2011 only 1 focus,to heal,simple as that. i actually didnt think i had it in me..this is what happend she came to mine,got upstairs before me,and my facebook was on,she read my messages as i had 2 new ones,from male friends,ive got nothing to hide. then we spoke about work,im being messed about so bad which inturn has financially screwed me up,and i may have to move back to my parents..I dont want to as living on my own has so many benefits. I said to her that id only be financially better off for a little while but what about when things like u used to come,jump on sofa,put tv on etc,nothing like that could happen...seh said yes but i wont be comin like that again..so it set me off. i said to her that you have been the 1st to contact me everytime,you wanted to see me etc,if u wasnt bothered u wouldnt do it...she had no answer. then she said she was going,so i walked her downstairs,gave her a cuddle (silly me) i think she turned her head but we had a little kiss (silly again) then i said look at me,she did,i said do you love,she said yes,then i said well i have to heal now so u know what that means,she said leave u alone,i said yes,she didnt look very pleased lol..off she went. It did hurt but i was proud of myself for basically saying dont contact me again i need to heal now. then i went to my parents and my mother went on facebook and my ex had put this status "some ppl right p!ss me off" ..so i thought sod this,my facebook has to go,so i got home and did it..2 forward steps in my eyes..just hope now i keep it up
Author headsashed Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 ive just been strong woohoo,she text me saying "my mother says do you want to cut grass and she will pay you" haha,i didnt reply even though i could have done with the money seeing as work have screwed me over but oh well,phone is now turned off as promised lol
Author headsashed Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 and another txt,just saying im very talkative....not replied am getting good at this haha
Mack05 Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 and another txt,just saying im very talkative....not replied am getting good at this haha What part of can u leave me alone while I heal did she not get. Right now she wants to make sure you are still at the end of her string. Not replying will drive her wrong! Whatever happens, no matter what tricks she uses you ignore her..Your doing good my lad!
Author headsashed Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 i really do want to send her a txt back using some very nasty swear words lol but i wont,excuses if u ask me but it goes to show whos winning now. ME,day 1 nearly done too thank god
Mack05 Posted September 26, 2011 Posted September 26, 2011 saying nothing says sooo much more than any words could..
Author headsashed Posted September 26, 2011 Author Posted September 26, 2011 yup ur right,being ignored is 1 thing that drives me insane,always has,now i hope its really really winding her up lol. i did have a pretty bad night,thinking about her and same today,but i have stuck to my task and not replied. if she loved me enough why wont she let me get over her,im beginning to think she isnt all there in the head haha
Author headsashed Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 i made a huge mistake grr,i was out with my dog down the fields,a place a dont go often,as i avoided the places me and my ex used to go,and who did i bump into soon as i got round the corner,HER.. We spoke and things seemed ok,i kept things short as i didnt want to get into an argument but she started talking about things,so i asked why she been txting me,all i got was "i only asked if you wanted cut the grass and nothing else,you said you didnt want to talk to me again" so i said well u txt me later that night,she said yes because u didnt talk. anyway she started saying its friends or nothing else,and its upto me,i had no answer,i just had to walk away,cow p!ssed me right off lol.
Chi townD Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 Dude, what are you doing? You say that you have to do NC, then you answer her texts. As a matter of fact you wrote that she texted you 233 times and you've responded to most! Then, she comes over to your place periodically for an hour or two and you talk and are civil. But, when she leaves, you say," Okay...well, now I have to start healing!" My question is....when? You keep letting her back into your life. She contacts you and you answer...SO, she doesn't believe you. She made the choice to end things with you. That was her choice. She says that you two are NEVER getting back together, so why is she bugging you so much? Because she knows she can! You need to start doing a HARD NC.
Author headsashed Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 i havent replied to her txts or anything,i only bumped into her today,i suppose i shouldnt have even spoke to her but we literally walked next to each other. i folded and i know it. she actually txt me about 20 mins ago and ive literally told her to f**k off,i know i shouldnt have replied but shes wound me up so much. think i need to change my number lol
Chi townD Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 i havent replied to her txts or anything,i only bumped into her today,i suppose i shouldnt have even spoke to her but we literally walked next to each other. i folded and i know it. she actually txt me about 20 mins ago and ive literally told her to f**k off,i know i shouldnt have replied but shes wound me up so much. think i need to change my number lol SEE! You just gave her some power! She knows she can get under your skin. You're giving her a emotional response that she wants! " Well, look what he just texted back to me. I guess I was right and that he is a jerk and I was right to end it with such an ass." Dude, I'm telling you. Silence speaks volumes. Silence keeps her guessing and builds her guilt. Ignore all texts e-amils and phonecalls. If she calls, ignore her and post here instead. If she texts, post here instead. Vent to us. Hell, that's what we're here for.
Author headsashed Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 i suppose your right but frustration got the better of me,its the only reply ive sent since i went NC, i have turned off my phone until i calm down a bit because i dont even wanna see any thing from her and ill only get more angry
Chi townD Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 i suppose your right but frustration got the better of me,its the only reply ive sent since i went NC, i have turned off my phone until i calm down a bit because i dont even wanna see any thing from her and ill only get more angry Good, if you're angry, then vent here. Better to do it to us rather than to her. She isn't worth your frustration, don't let her think that she is.
c0nfuzd Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 there's even a thread here at LS called Post here instead of contacting your ex! http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t117844/ heads, you should read some of the posts there; great way to vent or cry about your ex
fetish1980 Posted September 27, 2011 Posted September 27, 2011 i don't know headashed, you've gotten a lot tougher than you were since you started this thread. You should pat yourself on the back:) fetish
Author headsashed Posted September 27, 2011 Author Posted September 27, 2011 im doing my best lol,i just turned on my phone as im waiting for my parents to ring to let me know when they back off holiday,they due anytime,and guess what,2 txts off my ex lol,i aint gonna reply,im just going to sit here and listen to my fave football team on the radio,and they are winning woohoo!
geegirl Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 After awhile you are going to get tired of the same bull****, different day. Nothing of substance. But also realize that you are on a high, feeling some power but as you ignore her, she will soon stop texting you because she knows she can't get to you anymore. And when you see the shift, it will bring you down. It's normal. Because that will be an indication of it's finality. Just keep going. Don't read the texts, delete as they come in and keep focusing on you. Don't answer no matter how irritated you are. She has nothing to give you, and as she said, "I just sent a text about cutting the grass"...asinine text messages to keep you connected.
Author headsashed Posted September 28, 2011 Author Posted September 28, 2011 ive not replied to any of her txts,plus she rang twice last night and i didnt answer. When my parents got back i went up and told my mother about it all so she texted my ex,in a polite way and just said that i cant be friends so its best if we dont talk etc,and in the end it said dont reply. i got up this morning to a txt off her again,asking where im going on holiday and who with. i havent replied or anything,i know u said dont read txts but it cant help it as the message comes on my main screen,i cant avoid it lol. She must have heard through mutual friends that im going on holiday. im beginning to think this girl is losing her marbles now haha.
geegirl Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 At this point H, I have to say that your ex is either losing her marbles as you say or is completely and utterly selfish. Ignore. She can't stand that she has no control over you anymore.
Mack05 Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 She can't stand that she has no control over you anymore. This is it in a nutshell....The more you ignore her just watch how irrational her behaviour becomes..A holiday is what you need. 2 weeks somewhere and leave your phone at home..
Author headsashed Posted September 28, 2011 Author Posted September 28, 2011 (edited) ill continue to ignore,sometimes it does get to me so i have to turn my phone off,ive not had anymore txts today but she is at work,its funny how she only seems to txt when shes at home,but the more i ignore the more she will get frustrated. i mean,to txt me monday asking if i want to cut grass and to txt day after asking if i wanted any shopping,wtf,id already told her no contacted and it had to be said again,did she listen..NO lol. I defo need a holiday,no phone or anything,my parents are tryin to book 1 so with a bit of luck ill get 1 in the next few weeks,sun,sea,beer,women in bikinis haha . My mother said today that this girl needs telling what damage she is causing. in 2 weeks ive lost my gf whom i loved,my cousin is on life support,my uncle died 2 days ago and its his birthday today,im jobless now which means i could lose my home in the next few days. I know none of you personally know me but ive been quiete ill for along time,im now on tablets for manic depressive episodes because i tried to commit suicide 3 times,what was i thinking,and all along she keeps contacting me knowing full well im going through some very emotional stuff. Edited September 28, 2011 by headsashed
Chi townD Posted September 28, 2011 Posted September 28, 2011 ill continue to ignore,sometimes it does get to me so i have to turn my phone off,ive not had anymore txts today but she is at work,its funny how she only seems to txt when shes at home,but the more i ignore the more she will get frustrated. i mean,to txt me monday asking if i want to cut grass and to txt day after asking if i wanted any shopping,wtf,id already told her no contacted and it had to be said again,did she listen..NO lol. I defo need a holiday,no phone or anything,my parents are tryin to book 1 so with a bit of luck ill get 1 in the next few weeks,sun,sea,beer,women in bikinis haha . My mother said today that this girl needs telling what damage she is causing. in 2 weeks ive lost my gf whom i loved,my cousin is on life support,my uncle died 2 days ago and its his birthday today,im jobless now which means i could lose my home in the next few days. I know none of you personally know me but ive been quiete ill for along time,im now on tablets for manic depressive episodes because i tried to commit suicide 3 times,what was i thinking,and all along she keeps contacting me knowing full well im going through some very emotional stuff. Okay, so you're in a rut right now. But I will tell you this. NOTHING IS SO BAD THAT IT JUSTIFIES ENDING YOUR LIFE!!! You hit rock bottom, you can't go any lower. Okay, so if you can't get any lower, then logic dictates that there's only one other direction you can go and that's up! Work on yourself! Make positive changes in your life! Okay, you're jobless now. Fine, find another job. It may not be your dream job, but sometimes you have to take A job before you get THE job. In the mean time, while you're job searching, go to school. I don't know if you're a college graduate or not, but take some classes and occupy your time. If you're not cool with being in a classroom, then there are plenty of on-line colleges out there. Go to the gym, take up running, find a new hobby. And I ALWAYS suggest traveling. You mentioned that you're going to go on vacation and you seem pretty jazzed about it! See! doing something new and exciting will always lift your spirits!
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