Girl likes me or friend zone?

[fortyninethousand322]

 

I don't know why so many guys have trouble understanding this. Guys, you wouldn't want to date a woman that you're not attracted to, so why should women want to date guys that they're not attracted to?

 

 

I don't think guys want women to date men they're not attracted to, but when you can't find a single woman who thinks you're worthwhile to get to know and care about, there's only one conclusion: you're just not a great catch. For a lot of guys it's a hard thing to admit, especially when it means you could be spending a lifetime alone.

[carhill]

IME, the friend-zone is a reflective perception of a dynamic which seemed to be mutual connection and attraction at the time but turned out not to be. IOW, a woman who gave all the signals of attraction and connection but whom ultimately used that dynamic for unilateral purposes, whether to fill time, salve her ego, make a desired man jealous or other less than honorable and honest reasons.

 

Women who aren't attracted are easy. They just say no and one never sees nor hears from them again.

 

The friend-zone is unlikely to happen to men who immeditely go for dickinsider. It's more likely to happen to men who 'take their time', since the nebulous is more easily enacted by the woman in the latter dynamic. The former is more 'put up or shut up', hence more definitive.

[somedude81]

I don't think guys want women to date men they're not attracted to, but when you can't find a single woman who thinks you're worthwhile to get to know and care about, there's only one conclusion: you're just not a great catch. For a lot of guys it's a hard thing to admit, especially when it means you could be spending a lifetime alone.

Precisely.

 

The reason so many guys have a problem with the friendzone is because it seems that just about every single female seems to put that on him.

 

So yeah, a guy can't do anything when a woman is not attracted to him, but when no women at all are attracted, what is a guy supposed to do? Keep on asking out more and more women till you find one who says yes isn't a real answer.

 

The only reason that women don't have this issue, is that men are automatically attracted to the vast majority of women as long as she's in the right age range and doesn't have anything really wrong with her.

[Cypress25]

IME, the friend-zone is a reflective perception of a dynamic which seemed to be mutual connection and attraction at the time but turned out not to be. IOW, a woman who gave all the signals of attraction and connection but whom ultimately used that dynamic for unilateral purposes, whether to fill time, salve her ego, make a desired man jealous or other less than honorable and honest reasons.

 

Women who aren't attracted are easy. They just say no and one never sees nor hears from them again.

 

The friend-zone is unlikely to happen to men who immeditely go for dickinsider. It's more likely to happen to men who 'take their time', since the nebulous is more easily enacted by the woman in the latter dynamic. The former is more 'put up or shut up', hence more definitive.

 

This is what a lot of men think, and they're wrong. They make it so much more complicated than it really is. No, women don't friend zone you because you didn't play your cards right, or because you took your time, or because you were too nice, or because you were too friendly, or because you didn't demand sex right away. It's none of that. Women friend zone you because they're not attracted to you. They never were.

 

Friend zoning you is a woman's way of saying no. She's not trying to mislead you, she's not trying to use you, she's not playing games, she's not pretending to be your friend to make someone else jealous, she's not using you to fill a hole in her schedule. What she's doing is saying "I don't want to date you, and I think this is a polite way of saying it." She was never giving off any signals of attraction, that's just your imagination. She was just being nice to you, it doesn't mean she was attracted to you. If she was attracted to you, she'd be dating you.

 

The reason so many guys have a problem with the friendzone is because it seems that just about every single female seems to put that on him.

 

I understand why men don't like the friend zone (no one wants to be rejected), but I don't understand why men act so confused about it. They act like they can't figure out why they just got friend zoned. There must be some complicated reason, right? No, the reason is very simple. The reason sucks, of course, but there's nothing confusing about it.

 

The only reason that women don't have this issue, is that men are automatically attracted to the vast majority of women as long as she's in the right age range and doesn't have anything really wrong with her.

 

Believe it or not, women get rejected too. We're not all beautiful, you know? Even beautiful women get rejected sometimes. Maybe we don't have as much angst about it because we don't drive ourselves crazy trying to figure out why we got friend zoned. We know why. It's because the dude wasn't feeling any sexual attraction. OK, that hurts a little, but life goes on.

 

Guys seem to think they can avoid the friend zone by behaving a certain way. But it's not true. Attraction is either there or it isn't.

[phineas]

On a seperate note, do any of you guys have the experience of girls constantly friendzoning you? Is it something we do , or is it just a question of looks and status? This is what is kind of putting me off even talking to women.

 

From my story, do you think I'm doing anything particularly wrong that is putting women off? And no , please don't talk about my attitude towards women because I let go of all that when I go on a (What i think was atleast) date.

 

All the time.

 

Until I got in shape.

Now no woman try's to waste my time with friendzone crap.

They either go out with me or turn me down.

 

But then i've hit a point where if a woman wants my time she needs to make it worth my while.

I'm not talking sex specifically but clear romantic intent.

 

Otherwise, I got real friends to spend my time with or projects i'd rather work on.

 

Lately though I havn't met anyone i'm really interested in so I spend a lot of time working on my house and playing on the net.

[phineas]

Friend zoning you is a woman's way of saying no. She's not trying to mislead you, she's not trying to use you, she's not playing games, she's not pretending to be your friend to make someone else jealous, she's not using you to fill a hole in her schedule. What she's doing is saying "I don't want to date you, and I think this is a polite way of saying it." She was never giving off any signals of attraction, that's just your imagination. She was just being nice to you, it doesn't mean she was attracted to you. If she was attracted to you, she'd be dating you.

 

LOL!

 

how about just saying "no".

 

How is calling a guy you don't want to date and asking him to hang out when you know he wants to date you saying "no"?

 

I've has women lead me on for months only to just keep dangling just enough of the sex carrot in front of me to keep me interested.

 

Actually, i'm being nice. They were total dick teases.

When I finally wisened up & said "see ya!" I made it very clear to them what I wanted & not to contact me unless they want the same thing.

 

But like clock work, 4 to 6 months later their calling me up NOT to go out.

[somedude81]

I understand why men don't like the friend zone (no one wants to be rejected), but I don't understand why men act so confused about it. They act like they can't figure out why they just got friend zoned. There must be some complicated reason, right? No, the reason is very simple. The reason sucks, of course, but there's nothing confusing about it.

Men are confused why it happens because it happens so much. As you said, the friendzone is how some women say no. In other words, the man is basically confused on why every girl is saying no.

 

Which is also confusing is why the friendzone is used by women at all. A guy isn't going to offer friendship to a woman who he turned down. If they weren't already established friends, he most likely won't want to have anything to do with her.

 

There's also the idea that if a woman likes me enough to want to be a friend and hang out with me, it's possible for her to like me enough to have sex. Yeah that last one is reaching, but it's a constant thought. Another thing is really liking somebody and expecting them to return those feelings.

 

Basically, you know I like you and you spend time with me. Therefore you must like me or else you wouldn't be here.

 

Believe it or not, women get rejected too. We're not all beautiful, you know? Even beautiful women get rejected sometimes. Maybe we don't have as much angst about it because we don't drive ourselves crazy trying to figure out why we got friend zoned. We know why. It's because the dude wasn't feeling any sexual attraction. OK, that hurts a little, but life goes on.

Women don't even get rejected 1/10th the number of times men do. There is simply no comparison.

 

Putting things in different words. Women get rejected sometimes. Men get accepted sometimes.

 

Guys seem to think they can avoid the friend zone by behaving a certain way. But it's not true. Attraction is either there or it isn't.

Actually there is a way to avoid the friendzone.

 

Become a man who is attractive enough that he won't be rejected. And if a woman gives a man anything but a yes, he should walk away.

 

What most men want to do is escape the friendzone and that might as well be impossible

[dasein]

LOL!

 

how about just saying "no".

 

How is calling a guy you don't want to date and asking him to hang out when you know he wants to date you saying "no"?

 

I've has women lead me on for months only to just keep dangling just enough of the sex carrot in front of me to keep me interested.

 

Actually, i'm being nice. They were total dick teases.

When I finally wisened up & said "see ya!" I made it very clear to them what I wanted & not to contact me unless they want the same thing.

 

But like clock work, 4 to 6 months later their calling me up NOT to go out.

 

Couldn't agree more. It's up to the guys to wake up because the types of women who do this FZ behavior in a maliciious way are never going to foreclose options due to an ethical dilemma, they will simply rationalize a convenient alternate reality whenever there is a choice between doing what brings them the most benefit and doing the right thing while maintaining their comfort and faux "guilt free" zone.

 

Men get friendzoned because they get fooled and misled for the most part. Women know exactly what they are doing, know exactly what the man is interested in, and take a delight in the situation that if a man did it would be called "perverse." The women in question, the ones guys are complaining about here, are the ones who toss out crumbs of attraction to delude the man into thinking things are going somewhere when they aren't. They engage in all the behaviors BF and GF engage in, just refrein from sex because he is available, already conquered, and that is a complete turnoff. Then they "tee-hee-hee" and act completely innocent, even indignant, when the guy is confused or develops attraction.

 

It isn't usually two completely platonic friends and one gets interested, and it also isn't usually the case of a timid guy who can't make his intentions known. They start with the guy asking the woman on an obvious date (good for him), and her rationalizing and feigning naivete about whether it's a date or not. She broadcasts "coy but maybe" when she has already decided "never." Disgusting. She perpetuates this limbo purposefully. I've luckily avoided this trap and force female friends to actually be frinds and if they don't they are history. But have heard it all with these types and their little fishing expeditions "what if we were maaaaaaarrrriied?" That actually worked on me in HS. "You would make the perrrrrrrfect BF!" Whatever. Any perceived weakness in the guy or his style is capitalized on to the fullest degree wuth base manipulation such as described.

 

It's the exact same thing the nastiest version of male players do to women to a "t." They toss out "love crumbs" without actually ever commiting to anything, and maintain complete control. The difference is if you ask one of these, he will instantly acknowledge as much, "yeah, I'm a d-ck sue me." but this type of women will be all "whooooo meeeee???"

[Nexus One]

Be clear and direct to her. Say that you get a vibe from her that she only wants to be friends, yet that you don't want to be her friend, but her lover.

[OnyxSnowfall]

This is what a lot of men think, and they're wrong. They make it so much more complicated than it really is. No, women don't friend zone you because you didn't play your cards right, or because you took your time, or because you were too nice, or because you were too friendly, or because you didn't demand sex right away. It's none of that. Women friend zone you because they're not attracted to you. They never were.

 

This isn't necessarily true... I've "friend-zoned" males I was initially interested in (in the past)... usually it was because, as things progressed, I did encounter something that I perceived to be a "deal-breaker" within a romantic relationship, but something I could careless about within a friendship.

[Nexus One]

Unsubtle, too awkward.

 

With a chick like this you want to be real casual and let her think she is playing you as long as it works to your advantage and as long as you can maintain emotional distance.

 

Well if he's into playing games, but Wolf doesn't strike me as the type.

 

and start hitting on everything you can at the mall, in her plain sight. You will be automatically more attractive to the random women because you are already with a woman.

 

That's a player tactic.

 

Use these bitches to your advantage.

 

If you want a woman to become your SO, then out of respect you're not going to treat her that way and play games like that.

 

In my opinion she should be clear to him, so that he can make the decision to move on if he so wishes.

[Cracker Jack]

This isn't necessarily true... I've "friend-zoned" males I was initially interested in (in the past)... usually it was because, as things progressed, I did encounter something that I perceived to be a "deal-breaker" within a romantic relationship, but something I could careless about within a friendship.

 

To add-on, I've actually been told that I was friendzoned because I wasn't fast enough when it came to physical escalation. They usually were just straightforward about it. Actually, quite a few women lost interest in me because I wasn't aggressive enough to make a move and touch them, or let them know that I was interested in having sex with them.

 

I held-back a lot in those situations, so I can understand why they lost interest.

[phineas]

To add-on, I've actually been told that I was friendzoned because I wasn't fast enough when it came to physical escalation. They usually were just straightforward about it. Actually, quite a few women lost interest in me because I wasn't aggressive enough to make a move and touch them, or let them know that I was interested in having sex with them.

 

I held-back a lot in those situations, so I can understand why they lost interest.

 

Yeah, first woman I tried to date after my separation & divorce she had me on her couch.

we watched two movies that night & the most I could do was touch her ass when she put her legs on my lap.

 

After that, she didn't just FZ me, she lap-dogged me.

She'd let me touch her ass, put my hands between her legs, but she "wasn't ready" when it came to kissing. LOL!

 

My buddy pimp-slapped me to my senses & I got out of that situation fast.

[thatone]

This isn't necessarily true... I've "friend-zoned" males I was initially interested in (in the past)... usually it was because, as things progressed, I did encounter something that I perceived to be a "deal-breaker" within a romantic relationship, but something I could careless about within a friendship.

 

i also call bullsh*t on that.

 

in effect, you thought to yourself "how can i keep the attention that i want from this guy without having to deal with this issue that has arisen, because i don't want to have to take responsibility for dealing with anything myself."

 

a normal rational person who has an issue with another person brings the issue up to that person and discusses it with them.

 

trying to keep getting something from that person while assuming about the issue in question without discussing it with them is the very textbook definition of manipulative and dishonest.

[Wolf18]

Now what could possibly be a deal-breaker in a romantic relationship that would NOT be a deal-breaker with a friend?

 

I call b.s. on this.

 

He probably did something that you perceived as portraying himself as too weak or emotionally vulnerable. Just like when soserious's FWB showed his human side. She completely lost all sexual attraction for him.

 

You were attracted to the guy or there wouldn't have been romantic potential. That means you were sexually attracted. Then he did something (you won't tell us what but I'm sure it had something to do with a display of unmasculine emotion on his part) which turned you off sexually.

 

If he had just acted like a complete a-hole rather than trying to treat you like a human being you would have jumped right in the sack with him.

 

 

Yep , I agree with this.

 

The guy with the kids story just makes me sick. On the Lifetime channel and similar propaganda outlets it's always the men who do this stuff too. Women's sexuality is indeed like the feminists say, something to fear, but not because it's empowered. Rather, I fear female sexuality because it's so damn fickle and neurotic.

[Cypress25]

how about just saying "no".

 

Women feel rude saying that. Girls have been socialized to be nice (that's why they're mean behind each others' backs), so when they reject a guy, they feel like they have to say something to soften the blow. "Let's just be friends" sounds less rude than "I don't find you attractive." But they mean the same thing.

 

How is calling a guy you don't want to date and asking him to hang out when you know he wants to date you saying "no"?

 

I've never known any woman to do that, but maybe she genuinely likes your personality. I mean, I'm not sexually attracted to my female friends, but I still enjoy hanging out with them.

 

Which is also confusing is why the friendzone is used by women at all. A guy isn't going to offer friendship to a woman who he turned down. If they weren't already established friends, he most likely won't want to have anything to do with her.

 

Well, most women are not sincere in their offer of friendship. They're just being polite. They don't think the guy will actually take them up on it, they expect the guy to take the hint and walk away.

 

In some cases, the woman might actually want to be friends because she thinks you've got a great personality. But the sexual attraction isn't there, so she feels no desire for anything other than a platonic friendship.

 

There's also the idea that if a woman likes me enough to want to be a friend and hang out with me, it's possible for her to like me enough to have sex.

 

LOL, sorry, it doesn't work that way. You have guy friends, right? You like them, you enjoy hanging out with them, right? Does that mean you want to have sex with them? Probably not, because you're not attracted to men.

 

Basically, you know I like you and you spend time with me. Therefore you must like me or else you wouldn't be here.

 

If a woman is truly your friend, of course she likes you. Just not in a romantic way. You're her buddy.

 

Women don't even get rejected 1/10th the number of times men do. There is simply no comparison.

 

Men also ask women out a lot more than women ask men out. Men are usually the ones doing the asking, so of course they risk rejection more. I'm not saying it's fair, that's just the way it is. But consider this: There are a lot of women who simply never get asked out. That's rejection in a way, too.

 

Actually there is a way to avoid the friendzone.

 

Become a man who is attractive enough that he won't be rejected.

 

Well. You can't really change what you look like. Maybe you can change your body to some degree (working out, gaining weight, losing weight, etc), but there's not much you can do about your face. And no one is universally attractive. Somewhere in the world, there is at least one woman who thinks Brad Pitt is unattractive.

 

Men get friendzoned because they get fooled and misled for the most part. Women know exactly what they are doing, know exactly what the man is interested in, and take a delight in the situation that if a man did it would be called "perverse." The women in question, the ones guys are complaining about here, are the ones who toss out crumbs of attraction to delude the man into thinking things are going somewhere when they aren't. They engage in all the behaviors BF and GF engage in, just refrein from sex because he is available, already conquered, and that is a complete turnoff. Then they "tee-hee-hee" and act completely innocent, even indignant, when the guy is confused or develops attraction.

 

It isn't usually two completely platonic friends and one gets interested, and it also isn't usually the case of a timid guy who can't make his intentions known. They start with the guy asking the woman on an obvious date (good for him), and her rationalizing and feigning naivete about whether it's a date or not. She broadcasts "coy but maybe" when she has already decided "never." Disgusting. She perpetuates this limbo purposefully. I've luckily avoided this trap and force female friends to actually be frinds and if they don't they are history. But have heard it all with these types and their little fishing expeditions "what if we were maaaaaaarrrriied?" That actually worked on me in HS. "You would make the perrrrrrrfect BF!" Whatever. Any perceived weakness in the guy or his style is capitalized on to the fullest degree wuth base manipulation such as described.

 

It's the exact same thing the nastiest version of male players do to women to a "t." They toss out "love crumbs" without actually ever commiting to anything, and maintain complete control. The difference is if you ask one of these, he will instantly acknowledge as much, "yeah, I'm a d-ck sue me." but this type of women will be all "whooooo meeeee???"

 

Sounds like a clip from the Mean Girls movie. Do women like that actually exist in real life? And if they do, why do guys hold out hope after the girl has said "let's just be friends"? It's like the women who continue pining after a guy who has blatantly told her that he doesn't want a relationship. He was honest and said he didn't want anything more than sex, and yet she kept hoping for a relationship. Stupid. It's equally stupid for a man to keep hoping for sex when the girl was honest and said she didn't want anything more than friends.

 

Next time ask her to suck your dick.

 

Oh yeah, women love that. There's nothing sexier than a creepy guy who just wants to shove his filthy dick in a woman's mouth, with no regard to her feelings.

 

For example: She invites you to go on a "shopping date" to the mall with her (she needs someone to carry her purchases). So go with her, if you have nothing better to do, and start hitting on everything you can at the mall, in her plain sight. You will be automatically more attractive to the random women because you are already with a woman. It looks to the other women that you are a couple of some kind so you get the social credibility without actually being in a relationship.

 

Wow, you really know how women think. Of course we find it attractive when a man hits on random women right in front of his girlfriend. If some guy at the mall started flirting with me, and I saw that he was with a girl who is presumably his girlfriend, I would be instantly attracted to him, just by virtue of the fact that he is a sleazeball who has no love or respect for his girlfriend. Now that's my type of guy!

 

This isn't necessarily true... I've "friend-zoned" males I was initially interested in (in the past)... usually it was because, as things progressed, I did encounter something that I perceived to be a "deal-breaker" within a romantic relationship, but something I could careless about within a friendship.

 

That's not friend zoning them, that's just deciding that you don't want to date them anymore. That's called being friends with an ex. It can be done.

 

Basically a chick who friend-zones a guy is telling the guy she doesn't respect him, doesn't see him as a man, therefore, she needs to be treated like crap. At least treating her like crap will give some percentage of generating attraction whereas any other approach is guaranteed to fail.

 

Actually, a woman who friend zones a guy is telling the guy that she doesn't want to date him. She might respect him, she might see him as a man, she just doesn't see him as a man that she wants to date. So basically you're saying that any woman who doesn't want to date you needs to be treated like crap? What next, you're going to hit a woman if she turns you down? Why don't you just respect her decision and walk away?

 

And treating a woman like crap will not increase your chances of generating attraction. It will only make her dislike you more. She friend zoned you because she wasn't attracted to you. Treating her like crap won't change that. Believe it or not, women want to date a nice guy. They just want a nice guy who is also attractive. So if you're unattractive, you'll get friend zoned, it doesn't matter how nice or mean you are.

 

All women are like this to one degree or another--basically deranged hormone-driven sacs of flesh attached to the female reproductive organs. Totally governed by those organs.

 

Yeah, you're right. You just described all women to a T. The guys on this forum are so lucky to have you, what would they do without a man who understands women the way you do? They might go on believing that women actually have brains and the capacity for rational thought. They might even believe that women want to be treated with love and respect. Thank God you're here to set them straight!

[Wolf18]

I like Quantum's idea, but I don't think telling a girl to suck your dick or flirting with other women in front of her when you're on a date with her will win.

 

But if it's a "female friend" you want to break it off with, it could be a fun way to exit, and yes , there is a better chance of getting play from it than if you just stuck around like a gay Dr Phil listening to her sexual shenanigans and her childhood dreams like a piece of chopped liver.

 

I don't think women are necessarily attracted to that behavior though. I think what guys assume is that since most women will accept a very hot guy who treats them like pure and utter garbage over a n average looking guy who treats them well, that it's because of the formers personality. But women genuinely do wish for a guy that would commit/respect them, however they want him to look like a certain type of man who has many options and just doesn't have any reason to care.

[somedude81]

Being friend zoned is usually closely associated with "one-itis."

 

Guys who aren't getting much positive female play from multiple sources tend to obsess/focus on some chick in their social sphere who is reasonably attractive, at some point has "noticed" them in some way, and then becomes the guy's idealized love object. He gets tunnel vision and so the girl might like the idea of someone liking her, she really doesn't like him back "that" way.

 

Getting friend zoned is simply not much of a problem if a guy doesn't let himself get obsessed over some chick just because she happens to be friendly with him or flirt with him a little bit. Or there is some connection such as someone he works with, a lab partner, or something like that.

 

What the guy has to learn to do is view these chicks not as idealized romance objects but rather entrees to a social networking opportunity. You want to stay friendly and sociable with these women and not get romantically obsessed with them because they can introduce you to other people or get you involved secondarily in a broader social circle.

Sigh, there is my life story right there.

 

Over and over again the wheel spins.

 

Somebody shoot me.

[jobaba]

Being friend zoned is usually closely associated with "one-itis."

 

Guys who aren't getting much positive female play from multiple sources tend to obsess/focus on some chick in their social sphere who is reasonably attractive, at some point has "noticed" them in some way, and then becomes the guy's idealized love object. He gets tunnel vision and so the girl might like the idea of someone liking her, she really doesn't like him back "that" way.

 

Getting friend zoned is simply not much of a problem if a guy doesn't let himself get obsessed over some chick just because she happens to be friendly with him or flirt with him a little bit. Or there is some connection such as someone he works with, a lab partner, or something like that.

 

What the guy has to learn to do is view these chicks not as idealized romance objects but rather entrees to a social networking opportunity. You want to stay friendly and sociable with these women and not get romantically obsessed with them because they can introduce you to other people or get you involved secondarily in a broader social circle.

 

This IS pretty good, except you failed to mention...

 

That it starts out the exact same for the guy who is going to get friendzoned and the guy who is eventually going to score with the girl.

 

You meet a girl, get to know her slowly, and maybe get some goo-goo feelings for her.

 

Well, for the guy who is going to score, this what is known by the well adjusted as, "The start of a relationship. Enjoy it."

 

But for the friendzoned guy, it is "being a romantically obsessed loser."

 

Anyway, it's hard to control those feelings man. I have tried really hard over the years. Easier said than done.

 

There's a story about it in one of my posts, if anybody cares to read it.

[dispatch3d]

girls are awful at dating. Seriously those are my thoughts on this.

[joystickd]

 

To avoid the shame of being a woman's lap dog; next time you have the hots for a woman, make it clear that you want to fck her.

 

I'm not telling you to ask her out. Do not be her friend. Do not waste money on her. Do not text her or call her on the phone. Do not wait to 'get to know her' first.

 

Simply ask her if she wants to hook-up with you. She'll agree to do it if you are good-looking enough, but don't lose heart when(if) she refuses you.

 

Do the right thing. Turn your back to her and never talk to her(unless there's a need for it) and ask the next woman if she wants to hook-up.

 

You'll thank me later, don't worry about it.

That's some real game right there. All that small talk will talk you right into the friend zone

[joystickd]

Look just don't give a s**t anymore. I say whatever I want to these women. Last night I called a woman online about her wanting a sugar daddy. I told her she was just looking for a trick. She liked the fact I had the balls to call her on her s**t. I got texts from her that night. I told her what I wanted and barely spoke to her and funny thing is I could bang her no problem. I was a nerd that transformed. That avatar is my pic. I came a long ways from total loser, to bitter guy and now a confident guy. You just at some point at the beginning be sexual or be bold.

[jobaba]

Unsubtle, too awkward.

 

With a chick like this you want to be real casual and let her think she is playing you as long as it works to your advantage and as long as you can maintain emotional distance.

 

For example: She invites you to go on a "shopping date" to the mall with her (she needs someone to carry her purchases). So go with her, if you have nothing better to do, and start hitting on everything you can at the mall, in her plain sight. You will be automatically more attractive to the random women because you are already with a woman. It looks to the other women that you are a couple of some kind so you get the social credibility without actually being in a relationship.

 

Use these bitches to your advantage.

 

If the chick has already friend-zoned you then blatantly propositioning her is just going to feed into her negativity about you. She will interpret it not as aggressive masculinity but as creepy stalkerishness.

 

The propositioning has to come at the very beginning before you get friend-zoned.

 

Basically a chick who friend-zones a guy is telling the guy she doesn't respect him, doesn't see him as a man, therefore, she needs to be treated like crap. At least treating her like crap will give some percentage of generating attraction whereas any other approach is guaranteed to fail.

 

I mean let's face it--there's a thread with a chick who's bf threatens to beat her up constantly yet she's in love with the dude.

 

Women are crazy, let's not debate it, but rather figure out how to exploit it.

 

Another perfect example is soserious's thread about the FWB who "violated her rules" by stopping by on Halloween unannounced with his kids.

 

As long as he was willing to treat her like an impersonal f*ck-toy he had more or less free access to her vagina.

 

The very first time he tried to relate to her as one human being to another, she got outraged and dumped him.

 

All women are like this to one degree or another--basically deranged hormone-driven sacs of flesh attached to the female reproductive organs. Totally governed by those organs.

 

Again let's not bemoan it and let's not debate it, let's accept the reality and try to figure out how best to exploit it.

 

Now what could possibly be a deal-breaker in a romantic relationship that would NOT be a deal-breaker with a friend?

 

I call b.s. on this.

 

He probably did something that you perceived as portraying himself as too weak or emotionally vulnerable. Just like when soserious's FWB showed his human side. She completely lost all sexual attraction for him.

 

You were attracted to the guy or there wouldn't have been romantic potential. That means you were sexually attracted. Then he did something (you won't tell us what but I'm sure it had something to do with a display of unmasculine emotion on his part) which turned you off sexually.

 

If he had just acted like a complete a-hole rather than trying to treat you like a human being you would have jumped right in the sack with him.

 

You got some good stuff here but it's a little extreme and geared towards a younger crowd of women to be sure. Hitting on other girls while you're out with a girl on a date. Eh...not so good.

 

I definitely agree you have to act early, but that doesn't mean asking the girl if she wants to f@ck within the first 10 minutes. Guaranteed slap to the face with the women I encounter at least. But yea, definitely do not go the 'friends first' route. I'll never do that again.

 

But the concept of being ballsy and telling a woman you're into her early, definitely seems to be on point. Getting to know her. F@ck that. Get to know her after she's at least kissed you.

 

BTW...

 

It is my sincere hope that at least ONE woman reads this guy's posts. It's a genuine insight into why guys cheat and date multiple women at the same time. And it won't change unless women change what they are attracted to.

[carhill]

Then pray inform us, why is it that SO MANY women seem more than willing to do it when they barely know the man--including even on first dates--but so often, once they have the man "hooked," all of a sudden it's gag-worthy?

That's kinda like the man giving the woman's mind a 'blow job' with his sweet talk early on, then 'wtf happened to that? he never talks to me anymore'.

 

Reading further, I cosign the action advice of the younger men surrounding sexual behaviors and sexual affection, even if not involving genitals. Looking back at all interactions, both those which ended in the 'friend-zone' and those which ended in the LTR/M-zone, that was the clear determiner. FWIW, most of my friend-zone experiences happened while a virgin, since at that time intercourse was not on my plate until substantially into an encounter. That 'style' was just incompatible with the ladies I was meeting, but I didn't know all that stuff back then. Too much 'getting to know' left the door open to abuse, and *some* abused it. Those were great learning experiences.

[aj22one]

That's kinda like the man giving the woman's mind a 'blow job' with his sweet talk early on, then 'wtf happened to that? he never talks to me anymore'.

 

Reading further, I cosign the action advice of the younger men surrounding sexual behaviors and sexual affection, even if not involving genitals. Looking back at all interactions, both those which ended in the 'friend-zone' and those which ended in the LTR/M-zone, that was the clear determiner. FWIW, most of my friend-zone experiences happened while a virgin, since at that time intercourse was not on my plate until substantially into an encounter. That 'style' was just incompatible with the ladies I was meeting, but I didn't know all that stuff back then. Too much 'getting to know' left the door open to abuse, and *some* abused it. Those were great learning experiences.

 

Yeah same here. Luckily I figured it out early (at the ripe ol' age of 20) amazingly on my own, and with the luck of one "lady friend" who basically jumped by bones.