yume Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 After a period of being single and focusing on myself for a while I finally decided to try my hand at dating again so I registered on a dating website in April. Met 3 guys - the first two ended up being kaput - and finally met the third in May. Put it any way you want: we connected, we hit it off, things were great...we were so immediately comfortable around each other; when I first saw him on the street I knew immediately that it was him, stuff like that - I'll spare you the mushy details. So in total we see each other 4 times and in the middle of it all he finds out mid May that he's landed a job in another province for 3 months (aka the whole summer). I tell him congrats, that's amazing, etc. but at the same time I'm feeling/thinking like "****!!! And it was going so well...". So the last two times we saw each other was before he left and we just...spent the entire day with each other both times. He was always very interested in me, very flirty and sweet, always asked me when we would see each other next, would want me close to him if we were watching a movie...things were GOOD. So during the last time we saw each other we were talking about his job and he said he was definitely going to see me when he got back - me, trying to be nonchalant saying "Oh really? *wink wink*" and he said "well, duh!". Though he did warn me (more than once) he couldn't make any promises about what the situation would be when he got back - he might not even be living here. I took this all into account and, after lots of thought, told him 1. I was going to delete my dating profile online because I felt it would be pointless to keep looking for what I've already found and 2. I really liked him and saw it going somewhere. So basically I decided to wait to see what would happen when he got back this September (instead of dating in between) even though he said not to wait. Personally I'm not particularly comfortable continuing to see other people when I like someone, so I felt waiting was the right thing to do. I didn't expect to have contact from him during the 3 month period and didn't get any until I was on facebook chat talking to a friend of mine around the end of July and saw his name. I debated for a while about whether or not I should talk to him and finally said hi; we had a short conversation and he essentially ended it saying he would see me soon. Fast forward to present: based on a status update on facebook I know he is home now and has been since the beginning of the month. So this is what my post today comes down to: what do I do know? He's home and there has been no contact so far. There are many probable reasons why this is (is busy spending time with family, doesn't know when he'll be back in the city) - but I need some advice as to what I should do... 1. Should I keep waiting for him to call? - If so, for how long? 2. Should I send him a message myself to get the ball rolling? 3. Should I completely forget about him and go back to dating? 4. Mystery option? I just....I'm completely confused as to what to do because things were so great (and I'm not lying to myself about that, everything was genuine between us..or so I'd like to think) - and I know for a fact the guy I got to know would call. Not right away, as we were not boyfriend / girlfriend at the time he left, but he would call. Now I'm wondering if I've been fooled completely.
Author yume Posted September 13, 2011 Author Posted September 13, 2011 The reason there was no contact during the 3 months was because he was working in a provincial park as a wildnerness guide, so as I said before I didn't expect to hear from him since it's not like there's wifi or phone service in the middle of nowhere. Anyway, at this point I just want an answer - I really don't care if it's "hey, let's hang out" or "hey, this isn't going to work". Like...what was the point of us dating in the first place? :| This whole patience thing is gonna kill me lol
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