lyeex Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 i met this guy back in june 2010. i lost my virginity to him, but we ended up only being casual with eachother. i wanted more with him, but before i had the chance to tell him, he got a girlfriend and disappeared. he came back 3 months later. they had broken up, and i guess he wanted to continue the friend with benefits thing with me, and use me as a rebound. i was just so happy that he came back, that i didnt realize i was being used. i finally got the courage to tell him i had feelings for him. from there, it turned ugly. he led me on, telling me he wanted a relationship with me. but instead, he went out drinking and meeting new girls. he'd leave me, then come back over and over and i stupidly took him back each time. there was never any committment, but i guess i kept hoping hed one day change his mind.. well, i ended it two days ago with him because hes seeing yet another new girl. after spending 3 weeks with me, taking me out, holding my hand in public, introducing me to his friends, talking to me all night long -- WHAT THE HELL!? he really had me convinced this time around. but i guess this girl is prettier than me or better than me, i dont know. maybe its because shes new and he likes his big stupid ego to be stroked. wonder how itll turn out between them. i just saw him tonight, he drove past me. i wanted to cry. i keep checking his facebook, which i know i shouldnt because it makes me hurt worse, but i just cant stop myself. i want to know whats going on with them. if shes going to be the one he falls for.. im so hurt, so angry, so confused, so heartbroken. over a year with this man. over a year of constantly being depressed off and on. i feel so hopeless and all i want is for him to realize that he misses me, but that wont happen, and if it does, it'll only be until he finds someone else better than me again...
CopingGal Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 Hi. Sorry you are going through that. I deleted my facebook account. The last time I went to my ex's facebook account, I had a meltdown. So I deleted my facebook account. One day, when I'm much more healed, I will have a facbook account again. Reading self-help books about getting over a break-up and loving myself have helped tremendously. I still stumble and fall. I still contact my ex when I should not, but overall, I am doing much better. I journal alot. I don't cry as much as I used to and when I think about contacting him, I say this line from the book, Loving Me "If you don't feed it, it will die." or I say the line for me personally, "If I don't feed it, it will die." I want to contact my ex every day. Through all this, I contact him about once every two weeks and one day, I will contact much less than that. Plus I'm involved in a lot of things. I still feel bad, but I no longer feel like I am going to die without him. And through all this, I have never, ever asked him to come back to me.
ScienceGal Posted September 14, 2011 Posted September 14, 2011 (edited) I am going to guess that you are 17. This is solely based upon the fact that you sound exactly like me at 17. Same story exactly! I'll tell you what, you need to let go of this guy. It is going to be the most awful heart-wrenching pain you have ever felt, but you have to. He has a lot of growing up to do and will not treat you well. I repeat, HE WILL NOT TREAT YOU WELL. EVER. This has nothing to do with you at all. This is his immaturity. You will meet someone new when you're ready and your life will move on. Years from now, you will look back in disbelief that you spent so much time worrying about this guy. Trust me. It took me almost 8 years to be friendly with the guy that did to me what you are going through. He finally grew up and we made peace. But, there was NO WAY a relationship would have ever worked back then. And the relationships I had after him... I wouldn't trade them in for anything. It's all about learning and growing. You have to walk away hun, for good. Edited September 14, 2011 by ScienceGal
CopingGal Posted September 19, 2011 Posted September 19, 2011 Unfotunately, my bf was 41 and he acted like his was 8. I don't think there's any hope for him.
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