spider165 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 Well I just broke two week of NC!!! I'm such a failure! I txted her "If I don't deserve you so be it... but know that I'll always love you".
lymtal1 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 so i hear ya and i know how you feel. two weeks ago i posted the same thing on here. and yes i felt the same. you are not even close to a failure. you are human. it is one of the most difficult things that we try to be successful doing, this no contact thing. the want and need to be in communication with the person that we have spent so much time with is normal. you are doing what has been a 24/7 thing in reality. i'm going to tell you what some very smart people told me. recognize what you did and why you did it. know that it was not what you wanted to do. but know that it is important that you let it go and start back up. if you did get a reply and haven't read it, don't read it. if you did not get a reply good. if you get one in the future don't read it. nothing good will come from what is said. give yourself some slack as what you are going through is very hard. do not beat yourself up. i listened to the folks out here, did just what they suggested and here i am two weeks later in n/c and i am ok. do i still hurt of course. that will take time but i can tell you that i feel so much better in this place than where i was when i did contact her. read these words: YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. now say "I am human and make mistakes". now get back on board and be strong.
mike588 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 Ouch, yep you screwed up and gave her all the power. If you wanted her back, well you probably won't get her now or will take much longer. I've come soooooo close to doing that to and glad I did'nt.
Mack05 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 The key thing is not to beat yourself up. I have broke NC before. I eventually learned that lesson the hard way. Don't break NC again. U have given her enough power over you. Focus on your healing. If you feel close to breaking NC again write her a letter you don't sent, talk a long walk or post here on LS. It will get better
PositiveNegative Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 inspiring words lymtal. Been broken up 18 days but only on day 4 of true NC. We go to the same school, everyday I walk past a place that we had been to together and I feel so weak and just want to say something to her. I'm certain she would respond but when I think about it, I don't know what the purpose would be. She certainly wouldn't take me back, I guess in my mind I would be doing it to try and make her miss me.... but would it? I don't think anyone blames you, I'm at day 4 and feel like giving up...
M2155 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 I've written soooooooooo many e-mails to my ex that I don't send. I go back and read them a day or two later and edit etc, and I often I feel differently. I write about what I would say if I had the chance to tell him. When I go back and read it, I'm glad I didn't send it because I can tell I was just being emotional. Try it. Write it but never never put their name/address, just keep it in draft. Read it the next day. Soon it will get old. And delete those phone numbers!
Jonnyy Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 so i hear ya and i know how you feel. two weeks ago i posted the same thing on here. and yes i felt the same. you are not even close to a failure. you are human. it is one of the most difficult things that we try to be successful doing, this no contact thing. the want and need to be in communication with the person that we have spent so much time with is normal. you are doing what has been a 24/7 thing in reality. i'm going to tell you what some very smart people told me. recognize what you did and why you did it. know that it was not what you wanted to do. but know that it is important that you let it go and start back up. if you did get a reply and haven't read it, don't read it. if you did not get a reply good. if you get one in the future don't read it. nothing good will come from what is said. give yourself some slack as what you are going through is very hard. do not beat yourself up. i listened to the folks out here, did just what they suggested and here i am two weeks later in n/c and i am ok. do i still hurt of course. that will take time but i can tell you that i feel so much better in this place than where i was when i did contact her. read these words: YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. now say "I am human and make mistakes". now get back on board and be strong. This is one of the most moving and helpful posts ive read on LS. After reading this i felt 100X better about my own breakup and i didnt even break NC. Your words of wisdom are really inspiring and id like to thank you for sharing them.
PositiveNegative Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 I would delete her number if it would help. Unfortunately I've long committed her number to memory. I even remember my ex ex's phone number!
PositiveNegative Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 Yup, I am already so weak. I was SO close to texting my ex "how are you?" but thankfully I am at my friends' house and they stopped me from thinking about it. Well spider... did she respond?
TheDovic Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) Awww, nightmare! Neediness and desperation KILLS attraction. I know it's so difficult but you've got to restrain yourself in the future. You're not necessarily out of the game yet but stuff like this doesn't help! Edited September 13, 2011 by TheDovic
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