ProperConfused Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 I'm in a bit of a tricky situation... Basically... I was dating a woman who I was madly in love with. We'd been good friends for over 2 years but had always been fond of eachother. Eventually we decided to give things a go and see if we could make a relationship work. It didnt last too long, we argued alot over silly little things because I was the type that found it easy to open up, she wasnt. Eventually, we broke up and decided it was definitely over. A couple of days later she begged me to be with her, to give her once last chance. As much as I loved her, I was fed up of all the arguing and breaking up so I said no, hoping that a little time apart would resolve things, make us realise we really wanted to be together and to try harder. I found out a week later that whilst we were together she had slept in the arms of another man, she claims nothing actually happened with this guy, just simply they fell asleep cuddling. I was quite upset by this because I knew she had an attraction to him but kept insisting that she wasnt interested. Within about 2 weeks of our break up, she was dating this guy. We stopped talking for about a month because I was too hurt and angry and she didnt see any harm in what she had done, during that time I started dating someone else. Once I got over the anger, we started talking again, having a laugh etc, it was just like old times... But, the more often we spoke, the more my feelings re-surfaced... I still love her. Am I crazy? The woman I'm dating at the moment thinks the world of me, she absolutely adores me and loves every bit of me. I also think the world of her, I love her and I care for her.. but I'm not sure if I'm in love with her because I'm not sure if it's possible to be in love with 2 people... Maybe I moved on too quickly? I haven't done anything inappropriate with my ex, I'm not the type of guy to cheat but I don't know what to do. She's admitted she's never gotten over me and wishes I had given her that one last chance, which I've regretted ever since too because I really did love her. What do I do though? Do I stay with the woman I'm with now? Do I break up with her and try things with my ex again? I've never been good at breaking up with women, because I hate hurting people, I don't want to break anyones heart but this is breaking mine. Any advice?
Dark Phoenix Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 well your ex "just fell asleep while cuddling" with another man while you two were in a relationship, she later on started dating that guy so your suspicions were correct that she was emotionally cheating on you. In my opinion cuddling with another dude constitutes as cheating, so you could add physically cheating to that list as well. I think you attempted to move on too quickly, and when all is said and done only you can make the decision that you are asking the forum. Personally, I would stay with the girl you are currently with if you do love her (also stop contact with the ex). But if you think the current relationship is a rebound then by all means... end it and just be single until you heal.
Author ProperConfused Posted September 12, 2011 Author Posted September 12, 2011 Thank you for the response, you're spot on. I'd be silly to go back when I've got something great. Thank you.
Mack05 Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 I would definitely not go back to your ex. If one partner is open and the other is not the relationship simply won't work. The communication between the two of you (or lack thereof) will lead to constant arguing. Added to the fact she cuddled some other dude..Easy decision. NEVER go back. I would also break up with the other girl. U are not ready for a relationship and you are not being fair to her. When you are in a relationship the ONLY other person on your mind should be your girlfriend. If she is not, it will come back to bite you in the ass in one form or another.
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