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Breakups: When is NC not the best option?


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Posted

Just curious. 99% of recommendations on here seem to be nc no matter what after a breakup.

 

Are there any cases when NC is not the best option?

Posted

I think it would depend on what your overall goal would be.

 

If you want to heal and move on: There is nothing better than No Contact.

 

 

 

If you want to try to reconcile it boils down to two scenarios: Short Term Relationship and Long Term Relationship.

 

Short Term Relationship: (a relationship that hasn't gone past the honeymoon stage) NC would most likely terminate any chance of reconciliation down the road because the dumper would forget you fairly quickly.

 

Long Term Relationship: (Relationship that lasts longer than the honeymoon stage) There needs to be a period of NC before any contact is made. This clears the air of resentment and any hatred on both the dumpers mind and the dumpee.

Posted

If the circumstances of the breakup are not due to relationship issues/incompatibilities/cheating, etc, but rather outside transitory circumstances like distance, family issues, school, career, etc, then I could envision a potentially new relationship growing once those outside issues are resolved. That process would of course require periodic communication to assess the issues.

Posted

Whenever you don't understand what NC is!

Posted

Hello, I am with dark phoenix with this one.

 

I have just broken up with my boyfriend of 2 years. Although ideally I would prefer the NC route I have choosen not to follow this as I am hopeful that things maybe resolved.. I am tentatively in contact with him, in the sense that I have not spoken to or seen him since the break up, but he texts me every now and then and I sometimes respond. I never make the move to contact him, even though I desperately want to.

 

We are both in love with each other and the split was due to issues that possibly could be resolved, but he has to make the change.

 

So I guess you could say that I am contactable but not contacting him.

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