What would you say?

[fooled once]

(I started this thread for an outlet for those that are hurting. Please let the posters vent away and not start nit picking their views/feelings/etc).

 

For all those who are in the stages of NC (whether it is just starting, been 3 weeks, 2 months...whatever).....

 

This is your chance to say your piece.

 

You have the full attention of the MM. What would you say to him? Sky is the limit.

[cupshalfempty]

In all honesty

 

Day 3 nc by him

 

I love you, I'm sorry I did what I did but I'm glad its out. Here is the chance @ the freedom you wanted, see past your initial hate of me, and see into my heartt and my love for you. You admitted you made the wrong choice, make the right one. I love you.

[cupshalfempty]

I'm destroyed and I damn well hope you are too. I hope your wife is woman enough to see through your deceptions and lies. Can see the manipulation you are capable of, the sneaky ways you accomplished being with another woman for a year and a half, your purely dishonest and callous approach to her. I hope she sees it all and kicks you to the curb. You said you were scared to be alone, well enjoy the loniless. We will move on, we will find love. You will have your mirror and I hope your reflection shatters as you've shattered my heart with your false proclimations of love and want for a life with me. While you wasted months of my life...painful months where I felt unworthy, not good enough, second best no matter how much you told me she was nothing you did still go back. Even if it was just for comfort. Your a coward, your selfish, your useless. I hope you grow old alone and lonely. You had it all, two women who loved you, both faithful and devoted. Now you have NOTHING. Suck on that.

[woinlove]

Hope some non-nit-picky reaction is fine....

 

Love it, cups. Love the contradictions which are so human. Embrace it all. Then find what works for you.

[wannabdone]

Great idea FO!!!! Just to give back ground for those that don't know.... been NC for 27 days now.

 

To him I would say (oh geez, where to start):

 

POS,

 

I am bewildered and hurt. I have no idea how this thing I once thought was the perfect love, my chance at happiness has turned out to be so horribly wrong. I loved you as I never had loved anyone, ever. Far more than I have ever even loved myself. I gave you all of me, and everything. I listened to you when you were hurting, I talked you through every issues from your kids, your W, your work, your other functions, you name it. If you needed something for your children and could not afford it, I helped, if you needed something for you, I helped. And you gave me nothing. At first you were my best friend, but slowly through out the years your selfishness has inceased to be out of control. To the point that now when I look at it I can not figure out one thing I got out of this. But the sad thing from all of that is I miss you. I miss talking to you, I miss your touch, I miss the way when you would see me you would get this smile from ear to ear. You made me feel like the most beautiful, smart and wanted woman in the world. And all the same you made me feel like the most worthless, ugly, and stupid woman in the world. You have had me on this emotional rollercoaster to the point I have thought about taking my own life. You could not imagine the pain.

You always talk about your W telling you that she will not know you are truly sorry until you have "felt her pain". I would not wish one ounce of the pain I have felt on anyone. It has been the most horrific experience I ever have had.

Not only did I give you everything I could, always trying to be the perfect woman for you, you made excuse after excuse that you didn't leave, and a lot of the times you excuses were me. That you weren't sure I was 100% honest with you, or wasn't sure that I would be with you, or I had lied to you. You have told me that I didn't care for your children, however I have helped you numerous times, with birthday gifts, money for you to take them somewhere, helped you work through things that you were going through with them. You, yourself have told me I have helped you be able to better understand your children. Look at them and really try to understand what it is they are feeling or going through, but yet I don't care about your children???? You have never been concerned for mine. Did you care that my son watched his mother divorce his dad? That he cried every night for 6 months? He was so heart broken. I had built a world that his family was everything. Why? Because I did not have a family. And I was dead set that my son would have his family intact. Did you once stand up and say, "don't leave his father", did you once ask "how is your son doing", NO!! Its just always been about making people understand how they can't understand your life .... and haven't walked in your shoes. Never once worried about what anyone else is going through.

And me, you always have said I have never cared about what you were going through. However I have sat and listened to you for hours on end. How often did you take the time to understand what I was going through or cared about me. You have dumped me like a piece of trash too many times to count. Left me alone, even while pregnant with your child. Have seen me lose 20 lbs, my hair fall out, my eye lashes fall out.... but are so consumed with what you are going through....you never once cared about me. Even with that gd "apology" you sent me. You broke my heart into pieces, AGAIN. And your apology was nothing more than really about you....AGAIN. What your going through and the pain is too hard to bare. Please....do you know unbarable pain? How about laying in bed for days on end, your body aching, your heart feeling like someone has a knife stuck in their chest, you have cried so much that your eyes are raw, going to the bathroom is hard, because your body is so sore and you are so weak just to walk to the bathroom. You don't care about anything, your work, your house, your children....why? because your heart is broken into a million pieces.........THAT IS UNABARABLE. Have you ever felt that way? I don't think so. You continue on....talking your W into how I chased you, and you didn't want me. Turning on your charm, and that smile and convincing her otherwise. By the way....YOU ARE LIKE A USED CAR SALESMAN. You have always got mad when people said that....but you are. Your slimy.

You have lied about me, to me, you have told my deepest secrets to your wife and then lied to me about it. You have ALLOWED her to follow me, harrase me, to the point of driving me crazy. All the while saying you can't control her. Well, yes you can....get your bitch in check. I'm sick of her crazy ass and your's.

I love you and I miss you, but I hate you with a passion. You have treated me like ****, but NO MORE. I hope your dumb ass W finally pulls her head out of her ass and leaves your sorry ass. I hope you find yourself alone. I hope you lose your hair, gain weight, and end up a lonely old man. Well, your getting close to the old part. Oh and by the way.... your not as good looking as you once were....your W is so right on that. And your hair has thinned, just as she said. Your body is still in good shape, but no were near what it used to be, and I can only think with the age you are, its going to get worse. Oh and fyi...she was right that your d**k is a bit on the small side. I always said it was just the porportional look because your a body builder, but nope.....its a bit on the small side. JUST FYI. I guess you can be glad that quality is good, and not quanity, because you definitely are lacking on the quanity department. Again though with the age, I have notice that quality thing tapering off in the past few years. Also, when you talk in public, your voice is WAY TOO LOUD. And when you talk to you over twice, you repeat yourself ....CONSTANTLY. So as long as you can live your life to only speak to people no more than once or twice, you should be fine. Its also terribly noticable, that you are so starved for attention that you have to make every conversation about you, and i'm guessing you TALK SO LOUD so everyone around can hear what you have to say...or maybe since your getting in your late 40's your losing your hearing. Also, that little space between your teeth, I used to think was so cute....its not so little over the last couple of years, and not so cute. Your nose has gotten bigger too.

 

Now here is the crazy thing.... you have dumped me how many times???? Have you ever looked at me and then looked at you? I am so far out of your league its not even funny. Good thing you are good at mind f**king, because when you break it down....you don't hold a candle to me. You are a middle aged man, with a crazy wife, who really suits who you look like you belong with....pretty but not gorgeous and looks a little on the old side...such as your self. I am younger, fun, funny, smart, I have a great job, I make good money, I have more education, better looking....you name it...I have it. And I am far too good for your middle aged ass, with a half dozen kids, and broke. OH but you don't look broke and thats all that matters...right??? As long as you look like you have money 5000 sq ft house, nice car, pool, wife that stays home...thats all that matters. Little do everyone know that you have to cash in yoru 401K to buy christmas presents. How awful to be 3 years shyof 50 with no retirement....because you don't make enough money for xmas gifts. WOW!!! Youre intire would is fake and phony. From your finances to your R with W. But again...as long as it looks like you two have a good relationship....thats all that matters....right???? Who cares you can't keep your small d**k in your pants. You are going to be in for quite a surprise my friend, when your realize I will never allow you back and the two of you are on your own. Enjoy that bed you made....cuz your going to be laying in it for a LLLLOOONNNNGGGG time to come.

 

Oh btw....you know we always talked about your W flirting with other men. I never told you but the last time she went to my H's work...she did with him. She even made the statment how gorgeous he was and what was I doing chasing you when I had him around. LOL...your wife doesn't even think your that good looking. And why would she??? You have been a pig to her. But, you better watch that one.

 

Anyway, in close good luck to you. Youre gonna need it. oh and by the way...........GO F**K YOURELF. YOU PIECE OF S**T.

 

With love,

wbd (or shall I say WILLBEDONE)

[whichwayisup]

To add fuel to the fire. If any of you gals have pictures or stuff they gave you, burn it! Rip it up, flush it down the toilet.. it may make you feel better. Or, if you're not there yet (removing gifts/pictures) draw on the pictures and make devil horns, dog pooping on their heads.

 

Keep venting, it's good for your soul.

[wannabdone]

I'm destroyed and I damn well hope you are too. I hope your wife is woman enough to see through your deceptions and lies. Can see the manipulation you are capable of, the sneaky ways you accomplished being with another woman for a year and a half, your purely dishonest and callous approach to her. I hope she sees it all and kicks you to the curb. You said you were scared to be alone, well enjoy the loniless. We will move on, we will find love. You will have your mirror and I hope your reflection shatters as you've shattered my heart with your false proclimations of love and want for a life with me. While you wasted months of my life...painful months where I felt unworthy, not good enough, second best no matter how much you told me she was nothing you did still go back. Even if it was just for comfort. Your a coward, your selfish, your useless. I hope you grow old alone and lonely. You had it all, two women who loved you, both faithful and devoted. Now you have NOTHING. Suck on that.

 

 

Where is that damn "like" button when you need it?????!!!!!!!!!!!

[So Very Confused]

I can't believe we ended up here. After all the good times and happy memories. After all the compromises and sacrifices I've made. How dare you, a married man, accuse me of being unfaithful? When we met that day and looked into each other's eyes and felt that connection, it's too bad I didn't get up and walk away as soon as you admitted that you weren't really seperated.

 

I wish you would have told me you didn't want to be with me before I fell on my own sword at work. I wish you would have told me you didn't see a future for us when I had a chance to re-locate. If only you'd told me you'd hold me to a different standard than you expect from yourself, I'd have known to part ways a long time ago when it would have hurt a lot less. It would have been nice of you to dump me before I cut off communication with every other guy who was interested in me.

 

I wish we would have stopped when we were just having a good time and not let it become anything more.

 

I wish you weren't such a liar and cake eater. I wish you'd either make your marriage work and be faithful or grow a pair and get a divorce. I hate that you've made a house and finances more important than us. I hope your children don't use your marriage as a pattern for their own.

 

You must have an extremely high opinion of yourself to think you can do better than me. I hope you end up alone. I hope your wife finds out and kicks you to the curb. I hope she finds your secret phone and shoves it up your butt - sideways. I hope she finds out we met on a website and that you were seeking me out. I hope she gets a good attorney and takes all your money while she's at it. I hope your shirts all shrink and your gut gets fat. I hope your hair falls out and your teeth get yellow. Most of all I hope some woman shiats on you the way you've shiat on me. And I hope she blames it all on you and dumps you unexpectedly after making you grovel for weeks. I hope you think of me every time you're with her. I hope the next time time she doesn't swallow, you think of me. I hope she fakes it every single time. I hope the next time someone finds me attractive, I don't give you a second thought.

 

I miss you and I love you and I always will. You've hurt me in ways no one else has. I'm down but I'm not out. You aren't worth it. You're just an illusion and you're not a pot of gold. I'll get my happily ever after, but it won't be with you.

 

You can say what you want about me always having a place in your heart. Those are just words and don't mean a thing. The only thing you have a place for in your heart is yourself.

[So Very Confused]

To add fuel to the fire. If any of you gals have pictures or stuff they gave you, burn it! Rip it up, flush it down the toilet.. it may make you feel better. Or, if you're not there yet (removing gifts/pictures) draw on the pictures and make devil horns, dog pooping on their heads.

 

Keep venting, it's good for your soul.

 

You know what? After that jack*ss promised me a ring for my birthday, he bought me a book. Yes you heard that right. A gdamn book. Not even a book I'd want, just a random NY Times best seller. He probably took it off her nightstand and re-gifted it to me. Seriously, after 8 months and spending 4 nights a week together he bought me a book for my birthday. And this man has a nice income so it's not like he couldn't do any better. GDAMN that pissed me off but I was too freakin nice to say anything about it at the time.

 

Wow, I feel better.

[So Very Confused]

WBD, I didn't even read yours before I posted mine. How funny is that?

[wannabdone]

I can't believe we ended up here. After all the good times and happy memories. After all the compromises and sacrifices I've made. How dare you, a married man, accuse me of being unfaithful? When we met that day and looked into each other's eyes and felt that connection, it's too bad I didn't get up and walk away as soon as you admitted that you weren't really seperated.

 

I wish you would have told me you didn't want to be with me before I fell on my own sword at work. I wish you would have told me you didn't see a future for us when I had a chance to re-locate. If only you'd told me you'd hold me to a different standard than you expect from yourself, I'd have known to part ways a long time ago when it would have hurt a lot less. It would have been nice of you to dump me before I cut off communication with every other guy who was interested in me.

 

I wish we would have stopped when we were just having a good time and not let it become anything more.

 

I wish you weren't such a liar and cake eater. I wish you'd either make your marriage work and be faithful or grow a pair and get a divorce. I hate that you've made a house and finances more important than us. I hope your children don't use your marriage as a pattern for their own.

 

You must have an extremely high opinion of yourself to think you can do better than me. I hope you end up alone. I hope your wife finds out and kicks you to the curb. I hope she finds your secret phone and shoves it up your butt - sideways. I hope she finds out we met on a website and that you were seeking me out. I hope she gets a good attorney and takes all your money while she's at it. I hope your shirts all shrink and your gut gets fat. I hope your hair falls out and your teeth get yellow. Most of all I hope some woman shiats on you the way you've shiat on me. And I hope she blames it all on you and dumps you unexpectedly after making you grovel for weeks. I hope you think of me every time you're with her. I hope the next time time she doesn't swallow, you think of me. I hope she fakes it every single time. I hope the next time someone finds me attractive, I don't give you a second thought.

 

I miss you and I love you and I always will. You've hurt me in ways no one else has. I'm down but I'm not out. You aren't worth it. You're just an illusion and you're not a pot of gold. I'll get my happily ever after, but it won't be with you.

 

You can say what you want about me always having a place in your heart. Those are just words and don't mean a thing. The only thing you have a place for in your heart is yourself.

 

 

AWESOME CUP!!! You and I share the opinions about what we would like...hair falling out, gut, etc. Also...just wondering, by the sound of your xmm...did we date the same guy??? LOL.

[wannabdone]

WBD, I didn't even read yours before I posted mine. How funny is that?

 

 

LOL... we posted to eachother at the same time. Yours sounds like mine...sorry I accidently called you cup.

I knew SVC...I get these damn weird names mixed up.

[wannabdone]

You know what? After that jack*ss promised me a ring for my birthday, he bought me a book. Yes you heard that right. A gdamn book. Not even a book I'd want, just a random NY Times best seller. He probably took it off her nightstand and re-gifted it to me. Seriously, after 8 months and spending 4 nights a week together he bought me a book for my birthday. And this man has a nice income so it's not like he couldn't do any better. GDAMN that pissed me off but I was too freakin nice to say anything about it at the time.

 

Wow, I feel better.

 

 

Please tell me it was at least a book about rings. LOL. WHAT A POS!!!

 

I had already drew horns and 666 on his forehead on his pics. stupid jackass.

[So Very Confused]

Please tell me it was at least a book about rings. LOL. WHAT A POS!!!

 

I had already drew horns and 666 on his forehead on his pics. stupid jackass.

 

Nope - "Don't Sweat The Small Stuff".

 

(like your ex's weener)

[So Very Confused]

Please tell me it was at least a book about rings. LOL. WHAT A POS!!!

 

I had already drew horns and 666 on his forehead on his pics. stupid jackass.

 

I'd do the same but they are all on my phone and I don't have a printer at home. Maybe I'll download an app and have some arts and crafts time.

[wannabdone]

I'd do the same but they are all on my phone and I don't have a printer at home. Maybe I'll download an app and have some arts and crafts time.

 

 

LOL... you totally should. Arts and crafts time would probably be healing....and get your mind off of it. It was really fun to do it!!! Try it!!

[MissBee]

Awesome thread idea!

[fooled once]

Excellent posts ladies! Pour out your hearts. Let the anger come through your words. Get it out. I firmly believe we have to get stuff out in order to move forward and heal. Each day you feel the 'need' to contact him, come here and put your thoughts/words on this thread. Let us be "him".

 

I hope you all begin to heal. I am so encouraged by the posts here. Keep it coming.

[wannabdone]

Excellent posts ladies! Pour out your hearts. Let the anger come through your words. Get it out. I firmly believe we have to get stuff out in order to move forward and heal. Each day you feel the 'need' to contact him, come here and put your thoughts/words on this thread. Let us be "him".

 

I hope you all begin to heal. I am so encouraged by the posts here. Keep it coming.

 

 

I was about to make a post that said my posts might be more than one ....and in my bi polar state might change from day to day. Might be angry, might be love, might be sad, might be plotting his demise.

 

Just wanted to fore warn you guys that I plan on doing this daily on the thread to get my feelings out. Because I have been wrirting it, but not sending. Something about being able to push that send button, makes me feel better for some reason. Make sense?

[wannabdone]

Sorry to butt in but here is an article that I thought was informative and might be helpful to some of you.

 

 

 

thx LG!!! I was gonna make a thread for articles, books, etc. that people find useful.

 

I had mentioned on a post yesterday about making threads like this and someone said I neeeded to ask the mediator. I didn't see why, when I thought we could make threads if we wanted, and it would be helpful to have some that someone could look at and go to and find all of them combined.

 

So, I will start that one here shortly, would you please post it on there? Great info!!!

[wannabdone]

OMG...this keeps getting better and better. I LOVE this!!! But give a poor girl a break...I can't even get past the 1st page!!!

 

GREAT IDEA for a post...

 

Slimy, POS, balding, small d*ck, gap toothed, egotistical, self-centered A$$clowns!!!!

 

Slimy...I love that one too...

 

 

you make me laugh.

[So Very Confused]

Excellent posts ladies! Pour out your hearts. Let the anger come through your words. Get it out. I firmly believe we have to get stuff out in order to move forward and heal. Each day you feel the 'need' to contact him, come here and put your thoughts/words on this thread. Let us be "him".

 

I hope you all begin to heal. I am so encouraged by the posts here. Keep it coming.

 

This really has been the best therapy. I've been snickering about it for an hour now and it feels so much better than the crying I've been doing for days.

[26pointblue]

I wouldn't say anything to him. I can say this for sure because I saw him in the street on Friday [our office buildings are very close to each other & we work in the same industry so the propensity of running into each other was/is always there but this is the 1st time I ran into him in the more than 4 months it's been since I decided to go, & did go, completely & irrevocably NC with him!]. He was with colleagues/employees of his that I know & used to hang out with, with him, & he tried to say hello to me but I just kept walking as if I didn't even see them. Actually at 1st I kind of glared at him, which I actually regret because it means I was showing some feeling, & then snapped to my senses, turned my head & kept walking as if I didn't know him.

 

That was the best feeling in the world. A couple months ago I did want to say things to him, & these changed from:

 

- How could you? You hurt & crushed me, I'm so sad & lonely without you & I miss you terribly. Do you ever think of me?

 

to . . .

 

- I hate you, you're a horrible person & I hope you have a horrible life. Like Adele says, you'll reap just what you sow. How do you sleep at night?

 

to . . .

 

Well, the first two went back & forth in my head for a long time. I was never sure which one of the two, or both, I would say to him if I did have the chance [if I ran into him, if he contacted me, or I broke down & contacted him]. And always I had another thought, not aimed at him but at myself, of pride for finally getting out & staying out, of finally finding love & respect for myself to be done with him. So that feeling helped me to not contact him in the beginning when things were hard . . . I wanted that good feeling of self-strength to continue & I knew I would feel weak if I caved & gave him back the power & control.

 

Finally my thoughts about him started to lean a lot more frequently towards the second option, & I started to hate him so much that I wondered how I ever could have loved him. Then I started to feel sorry for him, pity. I knew he had major issues that he had never fixed & I didn't know if they could be fixed. Mixed in with this was my own guilt for what I had helped do to his wife [whom I had known prior to the A], his children, even for what I had helped him do to himself & had done to myself with his help . . . I started to realize that I couldn't forgive myself if I didn't take the focus off of him, realize his humanity & frailty was the same as my own & that all I could do is move on & try to change & either not think of him, or wish him the best & hope that he was moving on & changing too.

 

And suddenly, finally, I didn't think of him much. My love & hate had truly almost turned to indifference. I have a clock on my phone that counts down the number of days it's been since I talked to him. Ironically, on Day 90, I received a phone call from his wife's phone number. I answered but she hung up. Perhaps it was a mistaken call, although I doubt it. I told my sister about it & said, it has been 90 days & counting, what should I do if she calls back? My sister said, don't answer, leave them both in the past & keep moving on. I decided she was right [i had already talked to the wife after I'd gone NC with xMM [although she thought he was still seeing me], & had apologized & let her know I would never talk to her husband again. Honestly in some moments of weakness when I wanted to contact him, that promise & the memory of the look in her eyes at how hurt she was during all the drama kept me from doing it. And then it became my promise to myself & the memory of my own pain & hurt from doing it. I decided that nothing good could come from my talking to her, or him, & that it was in my past & now it was just me, not me & him, or me & them.

 

So when I saw him unexpectedly, I think my reaction was an part with my feelings. I initially felt disgusted . . . at what we had done, at the past, & at what would come from talking to him . . . & then I reminded myself that it was in the past & this is the present, so I need to go on my merry way without acknowleding him or talking to him. And I did. And it feels great. So for those of you who are in pain & in the phases of love, hate & despair, please know that it does get better. Just stay NC & eventually you will reach acceptance & almost neutrality. I wish everyone the best.

 

P.S. I used to look at the clock on my phone every day & tell myself, it's been 12 days . . . don't cave now, etc. Now I never look at it & when I see it on my phone mixed in with the other apps when I'm going for the calculator or calendar, etc. . . . it almost makes me chuckle to myself, that at one point something so devastating & important to me is now almost nearly an afterthought. I ask myself if I should delete the count down clock as it is a reminder to me of him & keeps me tied in some way to the relationship/the past. I haven't done it because I think I may get weak & need the reminder, especially if he were to contact me [although I've blocked all the available ways . . . he'd have to show up at my office or door, or call my office phone & somehow get me instead of my vm . . . in which case if I absolutely had to talk to him I think I would pull out the count down calendar & say, it's been however many days since we last talked, & I plan to keep the clock ticking forward, good bye.] Perhaps the day I delete the counter is the day I know I am really truly over him & won't even think about him ever showing up. [Or the day I move to another country, which I would love to do!, & no longer have to worry about the possibility. ]

Edited September 12, 2011 by 26pointblue

[Tenacity]

Hey there you narcissitic, selfish, reprehensible, loathsome, self-centered egotistical pr*ck,

 

I can't believe I spent so many years in this disaster of a "relationship". I am an educated woman and have always prided myself in my good judgment. Well, I really messed it up this time.

 

I will never forget how horrible the years were when we were in a "relationship". I was single!! And you were married. And I had COMMITTED to you that I would not date, and not only that, I would not even TALK to or communicate with any other man! Yet still, you blew up at me every second or third day because I didn't answer the phone by the second ring or did not respond to a text message within X amount of time, which must mean I was seeing someone else! I put UP with this complete CRAP with a man who was married to another woman!

 

And then I put up with it when you suddenly told me out of the blue that no, we would not have a future, because you were retracting all of your promises and all of our plans to have a future together. That happened in the timeline of ONE NIGHT. And you were horrible to me that night, and I deserved nothing of it.

 

Still, I was there as a best friend to you for whatever you needed, giving my heart and soul to a man who DID NOT DESERVE IT and did not respect it.

 

You denied your daughter and all I would have ever wanted was a statement about how sorry you were, and how you wished I would not have been alone. Had she lived, I would have asked NOTHING of you.

 

Everything I have ever done has been wrong to you and everything you do has been the right thing, according to what you say to me. You lied to me in the most important way. You knew that I loved you more than I have ever loved anyone in the world, that I had never felt this way before. How could you tell me the exact same thing for years, how could you have been both so loving and so abusive for those years? How could you have done this to me, knowing it destroyed my life? For the life of me, I don't think you are a horrible person, even though your behavior has been horrible. How could you deny your child with me?

 

What is really the worst part... how could you have cut off our friendship that we have had for the past months, that you have asked me to do because you didn't want to lose me? Something that I did even though it was the damn HARDEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE. Been your friend when you promised me your heart and then took that away. I trusted you after that. You betrayed every trust I had in you.

 

The ultimate betrayal is when, after everything, after you asked me to remain your good friend, you denied that friendship too. There really is nothing that defines 'rejection' more than that.

 

Even after everything, I still love you, and I hate that. I will get over that.

[TurningTables]

I saw him last week. It was hard to keep looking forward. So actually, This is what Id say:

 

WTF was I thinking? Wow! You arent that attractive as I thought.

 

and

 

I dont need you anymore.

 

and

 

 

Looking back, Im so sure that I made the right decision walking away.

 

and

 

 

I dont wish bad things, but I really dont wish you well. ( despite what I say)

 

 

TT