razin Posted September 11, 2011 Posted September 11, 2011 I tried to start dating someone only 2 weeks after ending a 6-year, serious relationship. Obviously, it didn't go well. My head was all over the place... I ended up coming over late at night once, but then I wouldn't even go upstairs with him, only stay downstairs & kiss -- bc i told him it was "too soon" (it was 3 weeks after ending my engagement & he knew that, but obviously didnt' care!) We fell out of contact for a bit... then I ended up asking for a casual/FWB relationship (although we hadn't even had sex yet)...he said "maybe" because of some legit concerns related to a no-dating policy we were dealing with (would be less of a big deal now but still potentially an issue), & because he was not sure our feelings/expectations would end up lining up afterward. Later I told him "hey you can just say no if you aren't up for seeing each other again, it's not a big deal," and he kept insisting "no, no -- it's just not good timing for me right now..." Honestly, I feel like he shied away because he doesn't just want casual sex with me and did actually want more. Now all I want is to tell this guy the things I never said. "I didn't want to make you my random rebound, that's why i initially said I needed to 'take things slow' and wouldn't sleep with you early on. But now I've had time on my own to figure stuff out, and all I know is I had fun hanging out with you and would like to do it again." I want to take back everything I said about only wanting a casual relationship. I just think we could be PERFECT together.
coolheadal Posted September 11, 2011 Posted September 11, 2011 Try 13 years and getting back into it.. That's me.. But you know we got to take it slow, your trying to get out of one relationship in your mindset and starting a new one. So for sure you going to have some me moments. Again take it slow and let your new friend know how you coping with the new relationship. Excuse yourself if you have to and head for the restroom. A little breakdown is going to happen.
Author razin Posted September 11, 2011 Author Posted September 11, 2011 Well it's just complicated for me because i basically offered casual sex at one point. But it's just because I was rebounding, confused. Now I know I just want to date him. So how am I supposed to clarify without sounding nuts? say it was really bad timing when we first started hanging out bc i was rebounding, but now that i'm in a better place, i'd love to go to dinner sometime?
Author razin Posted September 11, 2011 Author Posted September 11, 2011 cuz honestly, even in our last conversation he even said it's not that he didn't ever want to hang out again, it was just "bad timing" now
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