Nexus One Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) I feel like we are going backwards in Canada when we accept and support this lack of equality. Personally I think it takes several generations before certain groups of immigrants become integrated into a society. Usually the children of immigrants are much more integrated than their parents and their children tend to be even more integrated, because they simply don't know "the old ways" anymore. Rather than creating bans and suppressing certain freedoms in society I think immigrants should be given the time to integrate. It usually takes 3 generations. There's no point in forcing people to adapt if they don't want to, it'll only create hostility and further segregation. I don't like the suppression of women in Islam either. I've heard Muslim women argue that "it's their own choice". For some women maybe, but if I look at Saudi Arabia then there's no question about it that it's forced upon women, even by law. Edited September 13, 2011 by Nexus One
insaneinthebrain Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 i like canada ..... America JR... .. LOL... All jokes aside, D lish is right about the whole church thing...in the middle east. I have a huge amount of respect for people who come here and want to hang on to their beliefs and cultures, but its really shocking to see that people bring thier children here and expect them to be raised in the same traditions of their homeland. That is not possible. North America is Multicultural and Freedom of expression runs rampid. ... That being said, they have every right to try. But in my experience, this is really a bull headed attempt hang on to the old traditions in a modern environment that will simply come in between families.
D-Lish Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 Personally I think it takes several generations before certain groups of immigrants become integrated into a society. Usually the children of immigrants are much more integrated than their parents and their children tend to be even more integrated, because they simply don't know "the old ways" anymore. Rather than creating bans and suppressing certain freedoms in society I think immigrants should be given the time to integrate. It usually takes 3 generations. There's no point in forcing people to adapt if they don't want to, it'll only create hostility and further segregation. I don't like the suppression of women in Islam either. I've heard Muslim women argue that "it's their own choice". For some women maybe, but if I look at Saudi Arabia then there's no question about it that it's forced upon women. I'll be dead 3 generations from now:laugh: Unless we put a moratorium on immigration, we will always be dealing with the 3 generation rule then. Which means it will be a constant revolving door of fighting what we've already achieved prior to the immigration explosion. Of course immigrants should be given time to integrate. But 3 generations? Where does that leave us trying to live in the "now" trying to deal with this? I have no tolerance for the oppression of women. I love Canada because so many strides have been made to make women equal. Now we are inviting Immigrants en masse that don't agree with that progress and will serve to interrupt that progress, even send us backwards as a culture. These people VOTE. As far as I am concerned, Canada is too tolerant of the RELIGIOUS and CULTURAL practices of immigrants that we are losing who we are.
Nexus One Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 I'll be dead 3 generations from now:laugh: Unless we put a moratorium on immigration, we will always be dealing with the 3 generation rule then. Which means it will be a constant revolving door of fighting what we've already achieved prior to the immigration explosion. Of course immigrants should be given time to integrate. But 3 generations? Where does that leave us trying to live in the "now" trying to deal with this? I have no tolerance for the oppression of women. I love Canada because so many strides have been made to make women equal. Now we are inviting Immigrants en masse that don't agree with that progress and will serve to interrupt that progress, even send us backwards as a culture. These people VOTE. As far as I am concerned, Canada is too tolerant of the RELIGIOUS and CULTURAL practices of immigrants that we are losing who we are. I agree with that to some degree. I tend to be of the opinion that if an immigrant chooses to live in a Western country and they don't like its culture and resist it, then why come to the West in the first place? Some would say that it's for economic reasons, but there are plenty of places in the Middle East just oozing with money, like Dubai. While Dubai is a very rich city, it's still very conservative. That being said I like Dubai's taxation system, because there is none. 0% taxes!
Queen Zenobia Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 I agree with that to some degree. I tend to be of the opinion that if an immigrant chooses to live in a Western country and they don't like its culture and resist it, then why come to the West in the first place? Some would say that it's for economic reasons, but there are plenty of places in the Middle East just oozing with money, like Dubai. While Dubai is a very rich city, it's still very conservative. That being said I like Dubai's taxation system, because there is none. 0% taxes! It's not just economic reasons, it's for the chance of a better life. Which, by pretty much all measures is best in the West. It's funny how everyone is scared of Islam, as if it represents a new kind of Red Scare. Muslims in America are actually integrating at an increasing rate (I can't speak about Canada or Europe though). I see a lot of Muslims dating and marrying non-Muslims, embracing elements of Western culture like rock music and sports. Granted, it's not 100%, but the scare mongering is really out of proportion with the reality. Especially among the younger generation.
2011aug Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 Thanks I talked to him about it and he said he's in it for the long run. But the little things he does (like the day i ran away from my house he went camping with his friends and got drunk instead of being with me) and my familys constant nagging makes me doubt him. Being in the middle between the two actually sucks. Also, I do not want him to convert, he also kind of hates Islam now and I do too because of my family (My brother attacked him once when he was picking me up and told him to get the f*** out of there then pulled me from my hair and got me in the house in front of all the neighbours and him, most embarrassing scene) so thats not really a possibility lol Well, of course he said he's in it for the long run. Is his long run 3 months? 2 years? 10 years? 25 years? How long should it be to make it worthwhile for you to leave your family for him?
Ruby Slippers Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 It's not just economic reasons, it's for the chance of a better life. Which, by pretty much all measures is best in the West. It's funny how everyone is scared of Islam, as if it represents a new kind of Red Scare. Muslims in America are actually integrating at an increasing rate (I can't speak about Canada or Europe though). I see a lot of Muslims dating and marrying non-Muslims, embracing elements of Western culture like rock music and sports. Granted, it's not 100%, but the scare mongering is really out of proportion with the reality. Especially among the younger generation. Amen. I wish that people would keep in mind that all cultures have light and dark aspects. At the root, every human on earth wants basically the same thing. Not to get all John Lennon on ya, but if we're going to have any peace in this world, we have to realize that we are all one people. Peace out.
2011aug Posted September 13, 2011 Posted September 13, 2011 Awh i'm sorry, I understand how you feel. This is what's scaring me, losing everything. I know I'm so unhappy being here but losing family forever is a huge step that I can't take back because my family is strict. My boyfriend doesn't like to feel pressured, when i tell him about stuff like these he wouldn't say anything he'd just say that he wishes he could help but he can't do anything. Today I was trying to explain how everything is so hard for me and how I'm doing all of this for us all he said was "you'll be fine on your own, you don't need your family". I was kind of wishing he would say he'd be there for me. I'm not needy or anything, but like you said, it would be nice if he knew how difficult the situation im in is. I think you should make your decision based on morality, principles, values and logic. Take the emotion out of it. This way if you decide to stay with your boyfriend and the relationship does not work out, you can console yourself that what you did was right. From what you have written, your boyfriend does not have as much to lose. And if he cannot say "he'd be there for me" then you know you can not depend on him when you renounce your family.
Author katya321 Posted September 14, 2011 Author Posted September 14, 2011 Well, of course he said he's in it for the long run. Is his long run 3 months? 2 years? 10 years? 25 years? How long should it be to make it worthwhile for you to leave your family for him? See now that's something I don't know. I can't predict the future.I really wanna do it for me, but can't seem to not feel guilty about my family being heart broken no matter how bad they are.
ChessPieceFace Posted September 15, 2011 Posted September 15, 2011 You can either keep subjecting yourself to the insane rules of your parents' insane religion, or you can wise up. The boyfriend should be beside the point.
2011aug Posted September 15, 2011 Posted September 15, 2011 See now that's something I don't know. I can't predict the future.I really wanna do it for me, but can't seem to not feel guilty about my family being heart broken no matter how bad they are. Your family is a product of their culture and beliefs. There's nothing wrong with that. For 18 years you were part of all that. Now it seems you want to break away. Dont expect your current boyfriend to help you with that. May I suggest you do the transition slowly over a period of a few years? Maybe with a better and wiser boyfriend?
Author katya321 Posted September 16, 2011 Author Posted September 16, 2011 Your family is a product of their culture and beliefs. There's nothing wrong with that. For 18 years you were part of all that. Now it seems you want to break away. Dont expect your current boyfriend to help you with that. May I suggest you do the transition slowly over a period of a few years? Maybe with a better and wiser boyfriend? You're right about my family but that sounds a little extreme lol, I love my bf and definitely not thinking about being with a wiser man at this moment. I still can't seem to decide yet. Most of the people I care about tell me I shouldn't be in a rush and I'll get to move out with my parents approval when I find a better job and that I should be patient. I'm waiting untill tuesday to meet up with my student counsellor that might help me come to a decision hopefully cause this situation is making me more depressed and tired everyday, I even started to feel weird feelings I've never felt before and it's worrying me
Recommended Posts