Ayla Posted September 11, 2011 Posted September 11, 2011 There are lots of posts from people who like someone who is not ready for a relationship - for whatever reason...lets look at it from the other angle... If you met someone you liked, but were not ready for a relationship... How would you or did you act? What would you do or did you do? Hot and cold? What freaked you out that would make you go cold? Would you hang out with them as friends? would you push for a physical relationship? Would you talk to your friends about how you feel?
Cee Posted September 11, 2011 Posted September 11, 2011 One guy I had a huge crush on liked me too. He knew I was on a long relationship break and he kept his distance. About a year later, he called me on the phone and asked me out. In the old days, I would have been weak and dated him. But I knew he was not right for me and that he had made up a fantasy about me. And I wasn't ready to date anyway. I told him on the phone that I couldn't date him because we weren't right for each other. And that was it. That was the proudest moment of my life. Finally, I stood up for myself against temptation to do the wrong thing. People who act ambivalent and string people along are afraid of their decision to be alone. I would avoid them like the plague. If they can't be honest with themselves, they won't be honest with you.
sleepykitten Posted September 12, 2011 Posted September 12, 2011 I am in this situation at the moment I act normal-but i have been honest and told him I am not ready for a relationship. I have boundries in that i dont see him during the week, and dont text lots, but no games.I always answer his texts. I havent told him all my insecurites, history etc We do have a physical relationship I talk to friends about how I feel It would freak me out if he suddenly knew everything about me as it would make me feel vunerable.
Author Ayla Posted September 12, 2011 Author Posted September 12, 2011 I am in this situation at the moment I act normal-but i have been honest and told him I am not ready for a relationship. I have boundries in that i dont see him during the week, and dont text lots, but no games.I always answer his texts. I havent told him all my insecurites, history etc We do have a physical relationship I talk to friends about how I feel It would freak me out if he suddenly knew everything about me as it would make me feel vunerable. What do you mean, you act normal? as in when together you act like you are together or do you act like close friends unless behind closed doors? Have your friends met him? If so, would they make jokes and imply that you two are together in front of you and him? I guess the vulnerable comment is one of the key points-I mean opening up to him would mean that you are letting him in further, and that leaves you open to getting hurt. Right? Do you think you will ever get over the hurt or whatever it is that caused you to fear falling in love?
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