Why do more and more women committing to male-whores?

[Mme. Chaucer]

 

 

 

 

Women always say they don't care about sex, but that's only because they always get it.

 

There you go again, claiming you know what it's like to be a woman just after yelling at me for not knowing what it's like to be a man.

 

You have no idea.

 

You are telling me you'd rather be celibate against your will like me and many other males over having a one night stand when and with whomever you choose? How is a man using you for sex if you enjoy it as well?

 

If both people are on the same page, there is not a problem. If a woman has sex because she believes that she is moving into a relationship, but the man was just using her (to coin a phrase from one of our fine LS contributors here) a "cum dumpster," I would venture to say that this situation would be at least equally painful as that of a man who is "celibate against his will."

 

Which is nonsense, anyway. Sex can be purchased.

 

Don't play dumb with me. If it was really that horrible of a prospect for a woman to screw a hot looking airhead of a man no strings attached, then it wouldn't be an experience every single woman has had atleast once.

 

Play dumb? Heh, heh. What a concept.

 

I don't think it's a horrible prospect AT ALL, for ANY PERSON, man or woman, to have sex with WHOMEVER they please, whether that person is an airhead or not. Also, I don't think it's "horrible" for people to refrain from having sex with ANYONE.

 

In fact, what is truly HORRIBLE is when a person has sex when they really felt that it was not the right thing for them to do, for whatever reason.

 

Listen. Women not having sex with you does NOT equal women somehow doing you wrong. It just doesn't add up. And, women having lots of hot steamy sex with all kinds of men who are not you also does not equal women doing you wrong, even though I can empathize with how frustrating this could be.

 

 

My frustration lies in the inability of women to empathize with men. You just don't care and tell us to "stop whining". Why don't you walk a mile in our shoes and perhaps you will see that there's a damn good reason why we are the way we are.

 

I realize that "stop whining" is not a sympathetic thing to say to a person who is hurting ... but YOU are blaming an entire gender for your own hurt and frustration. Frankly, self pity and whining are very unattractive traits to most people, so it would behoove you to stop.

 

Also, to STOP blaming ANYONE for your own situation in life.

 

I'm sure that there are many things you can do to improve your lot. Work on yourself, and forget about blaming others.

 

All of us have burdens and weaknesses, and all of us are faced with people daily who seem to have it "easy." NONE of us know what those other people face.

 

But, I can say with confidence that the apparent fact that it's easier for the majority of women to get random men to f*** them than the reverse does not add up to an automatic coup for my gender, or an automatic "victim" badge for yours.

[aj22one]

 

Which is nonsense, anyway. Sex can be purchased.

 

 

The only caveat with this is that a) it's illegal in many places and b) there is a stigma attached to prostitution (political, personal, etc.). Anyone who wants a quality relationship at some point in their life would be well advised to avoid prostitutes.

 

Then again, women are more likely to be turned off by male virgins, than men who have sex with prostitutes. So maybe it's six one way half a dozen the other.

 

I agreed with the rest of what you wrote though.

[dasein]

But, I can say with confidence that the apparent fact that it's easier for the majority of women to get random men to f*** them than the reverse does not add up to an automatic coup for my gender, or an automatic "victim" badge for yours.

 

You are right, it doesn't.

 

But what it does do is completely exterminate the annoying "if you judge someone for having sex with you, you are a hypocrite" cliche' rather completely.

 

So many straw men here on LS, so little time. I don't think anyone ever brings up women's greater control of sex as some kind of coup for women or badge of victimhood for men. It is brought up, though, every time the old "double standard-hypocrite" lie is trotted out when rationalizing bashing and insulting men here who write off promiscuous women as relationship partners but will still sleep with them.

[ja123]

Seriously. Why?

 

I was actually speaking about this with some people. One female perspective was that all males are whores so they don't really have a choice.

I see it as an excuse to date players.

 

Any thoughts??

 

I think the women who do have their own committment issues - and if they date male-whores then they don't have to feel nervous about making a committment themselves because they ultimately know that they're with someone who cannot commit.

[AHardDaysNight]

Mme, what would be your suggestions on how to better help these men who have a hard time getting women?

[Mme. Chaucer]

Mme, what would be your suggestions on how to better help these men who have a hard time getting women?

 

Everything I can say is going to sound like cliches and be summarily discounted by those who want to blame women for their own unhappiness, but I will give it a shot anyway.

 

First, I will say it's not easy to find yourself in a position where you really want something that you seem unable to obtain. I have more than one dear, close female friend as well as a sister who is over 4o years old and has never married or had children, and who deeply wanted that. It is a sad place to be. Yet these women do not blame men for their lack of fulfillment in those areas of life. Why would they. Blaming is a losing proposition.

 

Keep in mind that many people are not getting many things that they want, "deserve," or even need at a basic level - like parenting for small kids, or food.

 

Back to dating tips: some people advise a sort of "blast" approach - where the guy just sets out to try to approach and engage with the absolute highest quantity of women he possibly can. The idea is that sooner or later, he'll encounter one (or several) who will give him a shot. I can buy that. Also, the "blast" approach also will probably help to inure the blaster somewhat to rejection, and to make the whole concept of talking to women less mystifying and potentially frightening, especially for a shy guy.

 

Personally (and please, don't bother trying to shoot this down - take it or leave it, but it's what I believe in), I truly do believe that a person needs to make the best of themselves, and make the very most of whatever gifts they posses. This will increase anyone's self confidence, and we all really do know that those with self confidence fare better with dating even if they are not profoundly hot than those who lack it.

 

Happy and engaged people are attractive to other people. Bitter, angry people are not. And a person who is really outstanding and passionate about something is more than attractive - they are compelling.

 

And, then you will still have a fulfilling and rich life, even if you don't end up getting EVERYTHING you want and feel that you deserve.

 

Like, girls to have sex with you, or a man to marry you.

[Queen Zenobia]

Everything I can say is going to sound like cliches and be summarily discounted by those who want to blame women for their own unhappiness, but I will give it a shot anyway.

 

First, I will say it's not easy to find yourself in a position where you really want something that you seem unable to obtain. I have more than one dear, close female friend as well as a sister who is over 4o years old and has never married or had children, and who deeply wanted that. It is a sad place to be. Yet these women do not blame men for their lack of fulfillment in those areas of life. Why would they. Blaming is a losing proposition.

 

Keep in mind that many people are not getting many things that they want, "deserve," or even need at a basic level - like parenting for small kids, or food.

 

Back to dating tips: some people advise a sort of "blast" approach - where the guy just sets out to try to approach and engage with the absolute highest quantity of women he possibly can. The idea is that sooner or later, he'll encounter one (or several) who will give him a shot. I can buy that. Also, the "blast" approach also will probably help to inure the blaster somewhat to rejection, and to make the whole concept of talking to women less mystifying and potentially frightening, especially for a shy guy.

 

Personally (and please, don't bother trying to shoot this down - take it or leave it, but it's what I believe in), I truly do believe that a person needs to make the best of themselves, and make the very most of whatever gifts they posses. This will increase anyone's self confidence, and we all really do know that those with self confidence fare better with dating even if they are not profoundly hot than those who lack it.

 

Happy and engaged people are attractive to other people. Bitter, angry people are not. And a person who is really outstanding and passionate about something is more than attractive - they are compelling.

 

And, then you will still have a fulfilling and rich life, even if you don't end up getting EVERYTHING you want and feel that you deserve.

 

Like, girls to have sex with you, or a man to marry you.

 

This is pretty spot on. The thing is society has built up this expectation that everyone can and will develop romantic relationships. Kind of like we built up the expectation that a college degree automatically gets you a job. It's a myth of course but it's perpetuated often. Now, of course most people experience some sort of romantic relationship at some point in their lives (be it bad, good, too short, too long, whatever) and it's perfectly natural to want that. But we can't be building up the expectation of one. That, and we need to help others understand that they shouldn't judge others who aren't that experienced. If somebody has what you're looking for and just happens to be inexperienced, why not give them a shot?