AHardDaysNight Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Having little experience with women is exactly the problem! Like it's been stated here, women go after the men who are troublemakers, yet attractive. So the average looking, boring, geeky looking guys get left alone on the dance floor. This is not a statement, it is a fact!
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Actually, I am very interested in my fellow humans and I do believe that I am pretty in tune with sexuality in both women and men. There are members of both genders who really do not have any "sex appeal" in general. It might be true that more men exist who would bone a woman with no evident "sex appeal" just to get his rocks off than the reverse. I'm not tackling that idea right now, though I will say that for sure it does not put those women in an advantageous position, no matter how it may appear to some of you dudes.
somedude81 Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 That's what YOU think. It's been well established that you (no offense intended, truly) have little experience with women. I doubt you have much knowledge about what's really going on with the majority of us. Whoever is "dating and having sex" is offering something that is wanted by whomever they are dating and having sex with. If many guys will just date a vaj, then I guess that's the sad truth. It doesn't make things any better for women if that is indeed the case. You're right that I don't really know what is truly going on. Though I still see/know larger women and or less attractive women who have boyfriends or are flitted with. Frankly, the only reason why a woman wouldn't have a boyfriend at a certain period of time, is because she doesn't want one. There will always be more than one man who wants to date her just because she has a vaj. And yes, that is much better because it means she has options. Every woman knows that men date them because they have a vaj, so a man has prove that he wants her for more than just that.
aj22one Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Actually, I am very interested in my fellow humans and I do believe that I am pretty in tune with sexuality in both women and men. There are members of both genders who really do not have any "sex appeal" in general. It might be true that more men exist who would bone a woman with no evident "sex appeal" just to get his rocks off than the reverse. I'm not tackling that idea right now, though I will say that for sure it does not put those women in an advantageous position, no matter how it may appear to some of you dudes. I think that makes it sound like it's all about aesthetics. I'm looking at it more in terms of energy, a certain "je ne sais quois" that makes one person attracted to another. Lots of guys (myself included) are not lookers, yet get with some very good looking girls. Why? Because we have that "thing", sexual chemistry or whatever. My open question is whether or not there are simply people out there (men in particular since they're the ones complaining) who simply lack that. And because we've built up this expectation that anyone can have a fulfilling sexual relationship if they really try hard enough, and/or work on their own lives hard enough and work at it; the men who seem to be "locked out" of this club are the ones getting all upset. Perhaps a little tough-love realism is needed? Perhaps not everyone will have a happy ending?
aj22one Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Having little experience with women is exactly the problem! Like it's been stated here, women go after the men who are troublemakers, yet attractive. So the average looking, boring, geeky looking guys get left alone on the dance floor. This is not a statement, it is a fact! No. Looks are not it. It's sexual chemistry, which is, unfortunately a much more elusive and intangible asset. It's relatively easy to fix one's looks: change hairstyle, clothes, work out, fix the acne, get plastic surgery, contact lenses, etc. But, how do you fix something you can't see, feel, or touch?
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 I think that makes it sound like it's all about aesthetics. I'm looking at it more in terms of energy, a certain "je ne sais quois" that makes one person attracted to another. Lots of guys (myself included) are not lookers, yet get with some very good looking girls. Why? Because we have that "thing", sexual chemistry or whatever. If I made it sound like sex appeal is based upon aesthetics, my mistake. I do not believe that AT ALL. There are downright ugly looking people who have sex appeal. It IS mysterious.
aj22one Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 That might be true. I have no idea, or really any opinion about it. What I do know is that the days are gone when a woman "needed" a man to provide for her; also, that a man was going to have to take on a woman's needs (materially) as his responsibility. So, the pleasures of one another's company and companionship are more important, probably, than they were in decades past. Sexual chemistry is part of this. Too bad for the fat, old, short, red haired, boobless, acne - riddled, etc. among us. I don't see how this applies to anything. I don't recall any of these lonely frustrated dudes ever once asking for a serf/slave. Most wanted an equal. And you're also looking at this in terms of black and white. Obviously someone who looks like the Penguin is probably going to have a hard time finding dates, but that doesn't mean that everyone who doesn't look like Tom Brady is destined for a life of celibacy.
aj22one Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 If I made it sound like sex appeal is based upon aesthetics, my mistake. I do not believe that AT ALL. There are downright ugly looking people who have sex appeal. It IS mysterious. Fair enough. I think it's the mysterious nature of it that makes people frustrated. It's easy to point at the obvious things, but much harder when it's something you can't see clearly.
aj22one Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 There seems to be a lot of women bashing going on in this forum, and I have to say that I don't like it. I don't know what is going on, but cool it on the absolutes. furthermore, NOT EVERYONE WANTS TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP! All I ever hear is "I want to be with someone... blah blah blah!" I have said it myself, but after a while, one has to start thinking about other things. Yes, sometimes we all get lonely, but it doesn't last forever. There is more to life than being in a relationship.There is so much to look forward to, and yes, sure, relationships are nice, but they are not everything life has to offer. Try to be happy where you can! No one wants to be with someone they are not attracted to! That is reality! Accept it and try to be the best person you can be! For some people, yes it does. Just read this forum and see how many guys are 25ish+ and have never been in one (heck, some of them have never even kissed a girl). I rarely see women with the same problems. Granted, maybe women just complain less, I really don't know.
dasein Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 maybe women just complain less, Yeah, maybe that's it.
Wolf18 Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Yep. And ALL men know at least one woman who is single, has many mutual interests, is lovable and all in all a solid gal, and they romantically ignore her. Why?[/Quote] I don't. SHE IS FAT. [/Quote] If I met a girl who was like that and actually did share my interests, I would have a lot of leeway on her appearance. The girls I've been interested before were pretty average looking. Again, I don't understand where this dumb contrast comes from either. You do realize that you can lose weight? You can't become taller, you can't (if you're a man) really change your hair color, getting a good job is a lot harder than losing weight, etc. All of the traits women look for in a sexual mate are by and large impossible to attain. If all it took to make a girl I like come around is to lose weight, you better believe I would do it in a heart beat. But I'm stuck in my body at 5'7 and I'm a working man who makes 8.75 an hour doing manual labor but am going to school to better my situation in life. I could stop there; that's enough, but maybe she is old, is sexually promiscuous or has been, has kids, has warts on her face, has no boobs, cusses like a sailor,or any other myriad of shallow yet important things to men. [/Quote] Not dating someone because they are old, promiscuous, have kids, or curses a lot is not shallow. It's something in your power or caused by something you've done. And even then, all of these women DO have people to date them, flirt with them, and **** them ALL THE TIME! The small boobs issues is irrelevant. I myself like small boobs and many men love them. IT's mostly a myth that all men like big boobs, we like all boobs. Oh, come on. Get a grip on reality. Men AND women want to have a sexual relationship with a person with whom THEY HAVE SEXUAL CHEMISTRY. That's not shallow. That's just perfectly fine. Stop trying to torque this around to yet another way to denigrate women. It's not working at all. And YOU sound like the big whiner. [/Quote] I never said sexual chemistry was irrelevant. My gripe is that I could have sexual chemistry with a vast array of physical types of women if they have a personality I like, while women CANNOT. That is why 9/10 times its the woman putting the man in the "Friend zone". Why don't you put down the feminist marxist force field and try to see things like a human being. Even if guys just want to "use you" for sex, I would take that in a heartbeat!!! Of course I want companionship as well, but sex alone would stave off that loneliness just as well. You will never know what it is like to be a man, if you want why dont you dress up like a man and go ouit to meet women like that person did for a sociological experiment, she ended up turning into a violent female misogynist lol.
Elysian Powder Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Yeah, pretty much. Also, younger women tend to be less stable. They also tend to be more physically attractive, but at what cost? Yeah, all of those women in their 30's filling this forum and many more relationship forums, with details and questions on why the guy they are ''dating'' will not introduce her to his parents, and why he never picks up his phone when he visits his friend John; they aren't that many, a mere trick of perception. You guys complaining about bad boys having all the sex, and you other guys excusing female behavior because, it seems, a woman cannot be mature(''or tends to not be'') if she's below the age of 30. You guys are funny because you're banging your hands while the guys who are reaping the rewards for their hard work aren't complaining like little girls about how hard it was to be part of the top. Get big, rich, or famous. eat all of the pussah that you want. And guys, you lot would be manwhores if you could, LOL!
Author Mangomonkey Posted September 10, 2011 Author Posted September 10, 2011 whoa after i see something about bad boys and drug abusers i see you guys totally missed my point. For example the poster who said that women could want men that is more fun is more of a reasonable answer. Why is everyone panties up in a bunch? anyway I didnt intent to make it a hate thread its just a real question. I met quite a few women who say they think most men are whores because many men tend to give that vibe. Theres nothing wrong with wanting a guy who knows about the motion of the ocean. Now from a man's point of view. Most men got that madonna whore complex or whatever its called and dont like whores. So why do women do? Are we just wired that differently? Are women more accepting of **** from men? Are men insecure? All these questions differ with each man and woman. And i can go on and on. Again. Not a bad boy thread. thats next week. after the why do i pay thread and Im too short thread.
Author Mangomonkey Posted September 10, 2011 Author Posted September 10, 2011 I just like to add something from personal experience. There was this one chick who was drop dead gorgous. She liked me. I liked her. But then my friends told me she was a whore and sucked this and did that with him and his buddies and well etc. So she was the whore. So i ignored her and chased a good girl. The good girl broke my heart. And i broke the heart of the whore. In the end of it all I realized that the person who was considered a whore would have treated WAY better than how the "good" girl treated me. And thats when i didnt care anymore. Its about the heart. Not the past. If they made mistakes and did dumb stuff along the way. I'll accept them. And I truly believe that is one of the many pieces that love is made of. I think i answered my own question. Thank you everybody.
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Why don't you put down the feminist marxist force field and try to see things like a human being. Mercy. What on Earth are you talking about, dude? I am a feminist, it's true, but I have not expressed any "feminist" concepts in this entire thread. I'm certainly not even remotely related to a Marxist. I guess you don't even know what Marxism is. You should learn, if you're going to use it as an "insult." Even if guys just want to "use you" for sex, I would take that in a heartbeat!!! Of course I want companionship as well, but sex alone would stave off that loneliness just as well. YOU might take that in a heartbeat, but many of us would HATE to be used just for sex, and would prefer to be left alone to that. Don't project all of your own misery upon the rest of humanity. I have not claimed that I know what it's like to be a man. You, on the other hand, have made some kind of funny, though completely off base, claims about what women have going on internally. You have a lot to learn. I hope you can drop the self pity and whining long enough to get some opportunities to learn some of it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 I just like to add something from personal experience. There was this one chick who was drop dead gorgous. She liked me. I liked her. But then my friends told me she was a whore and sucked this and did that with him and his buddies and well etc. So she was the whore. So i ignored her and chased a good girl. The good girl broke my heart. And i broke the heart of the whore. In the end of it all I realized that the person who was considered a whore would have treated WAY better than how the "good" girl treated me. And thats when i didnt care anymore. Its about the heart. Not the past. If they made mistakes and did dumb stuff along the way. I'll accept them. And I truly believe that is one of the many pieces that love is made of. I think i answered my own question. Thank you everybody. That's kind of a cool revelation.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Which goes to show that you can't always believe what you hear.
betterdeal Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Which goes to show that you can't always believe what you hear. Is that true?
rafallus Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 What if a person doesn't know how to reciprocate interest? Then they won't know how to show their side of sexual chemistry. They must learn it. No workarounds with this. Which was my problem earlier on. Too bad for the fat, old, short, red haired, boobless, acne - riddled, etc. among us. I've been attracted by one of the girls like that in high school. Yes, attracted , and yes, in high school. It didn't work because of aforementioned issue of mine at the time. Chemistry cannot be broken up to just the way a person looks. It's much more complicated than that.
Wolf18 Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Mercy. What on Earth are you talking about, dude? I am a feminist, it's true, but I have not expressed any "feminist" concepts in this entire thread. I'm certainly not even remotely related to a Marxist. I guess you don't even know what Marxism is. You should learn, if you're going to use it as an "insult." [/Quote] I know exactly what both Feminism and Marxism are, and once could not exist without the other. The cultural Marxism proposed by the Frankfurt school essentially molded the second of half of the 20th century and continues to be the prominent, unquestioned ideology of the 21st century. YOU might take that in a heartbeat, but many of us would HATE to be used just for sex, and would prefer to be left alone to that. Don't project all of your own misery upon the rest of humanity. [/Quote] Women always say they don't care about sex, but that's only because they always get it. You are telling me you'd rather be celibate against your will like me and many other males over having a one night stand when and with whomever you choose? How is a man using you for sex if you enjoy it as well? Don't play dumb with me. If it was really that horrible of a prospect for a woman to screw a hot looking airhead of a man no strings attached, then it wouldn't be an experience every single woman has had atleast once. I have not claimed that I know what it's like to be a man. You, on the other hand, have made some kind of funny, though completely off base, claims about what women have going on internally. You have a lot to learn. I hope you can drop the self pity and whining long enough to get some opportunities to learn some of it. [/Quote] My frustration lies in the inability of women to empathize with men. You just don't care and tell us to "stop whining". Why don't you walk a mile in our shoes and perhaps you will see that there's a damn good reason why we are the way we are.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Is that true? Sometimes. Experience is the best teacher. And I've experienced a lot of what these guys have gone through, which is why I state it.
betterdeal Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Why are some men more successful at getting it with some women than other men? Because they put in the hours. That's all. You can read and write as much as you like, but it won't win you a marathon. Turn up and ask. That's the "trick" all "players" and "whores" have learnt. If you don't want to ask, you don't get. That's the "rules". Now can we please have a moratorium on these why-am-I-not-getting-any-that-guy-is threads?
betterdeal Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 (edited) Sometimes. Experience is the best teacher. And I've experienced a lot of what these guys have gone through, which is why I state it. I was joshing with you If it is true then it may be untrue, see? Edited September 10, 2011 by betterdeal
AHardDaysNight Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 I was joshing with you If it is true then it may be untrue, see? Yeah, I see what you mean. It doesn't make me feel any better about my situation, though.
betterdeal Posted September 10, 2011 Posted September 10, 2011 Yeah, I see what you mean. It doesn't make me feel any better about my situation, though. Gotta learn to process your feelings more effectively. Feelings need to be felt. They are a flow, like a breeze or a storm. There's no way around it. Let them out, let them do their thing, then let them go, accept where you are and decide where you're going.
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