Country_Girl Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Been broken up with the ex for over 8, almost 9 months...been NC since June 21st...told him I can't talk to to him anymore, it was holding me back, he agreed. We were supposed to be married, never happened, long back story...7 months post breakup I decided to sell my ring and found out it was a cubic zirconia. Damn, I wanted to email him on the spot and ask him if he wanted his fake diamond back. I wouldn't care had he not made me feel so guilty in the relationship, how long it took him to save for it, how much it cost him. Liar. He lied about so much... I wish more than anything to tell him how I feel, but I cannot. This chapter is closed, and it only sealed the deal, that his lies go beyond. Makes me sad... guess it's only fitting- fake marriage, fake diamond, fake relationship. No wonder why he wanted me to keep it, even though I tried to give it back, it's worth nothing. But I won't waste my time breaking NC, I will carry on, as badly as I want to break it...
smudge21 Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Go get yourself some ice cream or a big drink, whatever to celebrate as you deserve it. That desire to break NC is sooooo strong and many of us fall, me included, only to be hurt twice as bad. To recognise that and still hold on is amazing and you should feel happy that you can do it. Wish I had your strength. I know what it's like to have stuff you want to say and get off your chest, I have tons of it. We both have to accept that any contact will only set us back - no matter how good we may feel about speaking to our exs, clearing the air, the outcome will be the same. We will be the ones hurting. Keep up the good work.
Author Country_Girl Posted September 9, 2011 Author Posted September 9, 2011 Go get yourself some ice cream or a big drink, whatever to celebrate as you deserve it. That desire to break NC is sooooo strong and many of us fall, me included, only to be hurt twice as bad. To recognise that and still hold on is amazing and you should feel happy that you can do it. Wish I had your strength. I know what it's like to have stuff you want to say and get off your chest, I have tons of it. We both have to accept that any contact will only set us back - no matter how good we may feel about speaking to our exs, clearing the air, the outcome will be the same. We will be the ones hurting. Keep up the good work. Thanks Smudge- oddly enough, I have done both things...got myself a nice oreo ice cream sandwhich...when that didn't work I picked up a 6 pack of beer lol. It just hurts, holding all these feelings in...but I won't break the NC, even though I want to. I want to tell him more than anything that I "know". But that would be pointless, he would have some excuse as always. He'll break the contact barrier anyway, I give it a month, when things arn't going his way...but this time, I'm not so sure I would respond. Not out of resentment, but our time has passed.
smudge21 Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 One of my greatest memories after a very painfull and nasty split was a few years back when the ex back then got in touch and offered to meet for a coffee. I accepted, it had been over a year and I had totally moved on, all I recalled of my feelings now were pity - I no longer loved her in any way (considering how much I did back then) and I only saw the bad in her, how she'd shown her true colours after getting me hooked and really messed her own life up due to it. Anyway, we met, chatted and had an okay time. It was pleasant and to be honest, it was refreshing. She was like the girl I first met again. When the few hours came to an end I got up to leave and she offered me her number to which I replied "no thanks, but was good seeing you again." Smiled and left. I had no intention of ever going back there. She'd truly hurt me once and that wouldn't happen again. Throughout the meeting she was showing signs of trying again but I just kept things friendly. I have no idea how she reacted after I left and I never cared. All I know is, she'd had her chance and blown it. Goodbye. I guess the reason I mention that is because of your situation and the knowledge that he'll make contact with you, but by then, you'll be moving on even more. Be carefull though, as we can often believe we're healed only to end up hurt again. You do right in not making contact to say anything - often silence is more damaging than noise. Now, thanks to you I have this desire to try Orio ice cream... and beer!
Karala Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 B...7 months post breakup I decided to sell my ring and found out it was a cubic zirconia. Wow... you really dodged a bullet here.
Diatribes Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Wow... you really dodged a bullet here. +1. Grat$ on your NC. Sounds like you have this guy figured out pretty well. Keep focusing on the lies. Should make NC easier. And what a douche bag! To buy you a fake diamond is one thing, then to play on your sympathy by lying about it's authenticity?? And this is just one of many lies? Sounds like the guy has social disorders. D-bag fo sho. Best of luck
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