SoccerPlaya Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 I see this guy every other day and I'm 90% there is chemistry between us. He goes out of his way to accommodate me, and even people around us have wondered if there is something going on. Sadly he hasn't directly asked me out (other than "you should come hiking next time" kind of thing). I'm wondering if he's not interested or simply not feeling as pressured because we see each other often. Is it possible that he would wait a few weeks before asking me out?
Imageiko Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Possibly, seems like he could be a bit apprehensive if he's interested. You know you are aloud to ask him out, I won't tell anybody...
motive2002 Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Probably fear of rejection. I've had times in my life where flirting with a girl I saw regularly seemed like a better choice than asking her out. If I asked her out and she said "no" (or vice versa), then things would be awkward between us and the fun flirting thing would be gone Just didn't want to wreck that. That's all. Maybe this guy is in the same boat, but who knows. It's a total guess.
todd Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 I agree that he could be flirting with you just to have fun and because its his nature. I do this with quite a lot of girls I am not exactly interested in but we both kind of play around back and forth. If he comes off as shy and a little apprehensive then he probably is, and if you want him you should go after him then.
Shaun-Dro Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 I see this guy every other day and I'm 90% there is chemistry between us. He goes out of his way to accommodate me, and even people around us have wondered if there is something going on. Sadly he hasn't directly asked me out (other than "you should come hiking next time" kind of thing). I'm wondering if he's not interested or simply not feeling as pressured because we see each other often. Is it possible that he would wait a few weeks before asking me out? It all depends on the situation. In your case, this guy doesn't really have to ask you out; he could just plant a wet one on those ruby lips and it would be his entry to the next level. In my case, for instance, if I'm hitting on a girl who works in a store like I usually do, I'd have to develop some rapport and comfort first, which may take about a week or so of seeing her before asking her out. If I waited a little longer, the sparks will fade, especially from the female perspective. So, you see, it all depends on the circumstances and the timing although, there really isn't a "perfect" time to ask anyone out. This guy just needs to make a move now, because by this thread, it's clear your interest may soon wane.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Three years. It failed miserably. She had a boyfriend by then.
motive2002 Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 It all depends on the situation. In your case, this guy doesn't really have to ask you out; he could just plant a wet one on those ruby lips and it would be his entry to the next level. In my case, for instance, if I'm hitting on a girl who works in a store like I usually do, I'd have to develop some rapport and comfort first, which may take about a week or so of seeing her before asking her out. If I waited a little longer, the sparks will fade, especially from the female perspective. So, you see, it all depends on the circumstances and the timing although, there really isn't a "perfect" time to ask anyone out. This guy just needs to make a move now, because by this thread, it's clear your interest may soon wane. Agree. Gotta strike when the iron is hot! If only I listened to that very same advice...
visualbasicide Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Not sure what the longest has been. Couple months probably, we worked together and she was a bit younger than I was, we both knew we liked each other but we didn't know what the others intentions might be, eventually we went out a few times with mutual friends and the rest, as they say, was history
todd Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Btw, the longest I went before asking a girl out was 5 months. I was in college and I met her right before we got out for summer so it wasn't the best timing since she was going to intern across the country. So, when we got back to school I asked her when the opportunity came up again
Author SoccerPlaya Posted September 8, 2011 Author Posted September 8, 2011 Wow. There are so many different opinions about this! Thanks for all the input. Honestly I think it could go either way. I wouldn't be surprised if he liked me, but at the same it wouldn't be the end of the world if he didn't. I guess I"m just getting to a point where I just want to know...YES or NO. I really do like him - he's such a nice guy (but also cute, so I can't imagine his confidence being that bad). Unfortunately I'm not the type of girl to ask out a guy, so what else can I do to figure him out? Oh by the way, he just got out of a long term relationship (he broke up with her). Not sure how that affects the situation...
visualbasicide Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 probably affects him quite a bit depending on what went down. Maybe he really likes you but doesn't want to risk ruining the friendship you two are building? Maybe he doesn't know you like him in the same way and doesn't want to ruin the friendship? Simplest way would be to ask him if he would ever date someone...."like you"? Then you both know what you are really talking about and neither one of you has to admit it with as much trepidation
Author SoccerPlaya Posted September 8, 2011 Author Posted September 8, 2011 It all depends on the situation. In your case, this guy doesn't really have to ask you out; he could just plant a wet one on those ruby lips and it would be his entry to the next level. In my case, for instance, if I'm hitting on a girl who works in a store like I usually do, I'd have to develop some rapport and comfort first, which may take about a week or so of seeing her before asking her out. If I waited a little longer, the sparks will fade, especially from the female perspective. So, you see, it all depends on the circumstances and the timing although, there really isn't a "perfect" time to ask anyone out. This guy just needs to make a move now, because by this thread, it's clear your interest may soon wane. hahaha yeah it's true, he could probably plan a wet one and I wouldn't mind Honestly though I sincerely believe he's a gentleman, but I don't think he lacks confidence. It would be a bit cruel (or ignorant) of him to give me this type of special treatment without any genuine affection. Would anyone here really continue to flirt with a girl that he wasn't really interested in despite knowing that she really liked him?
visualbasicide Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 I wouldn't and from the sound of him, he probably wouldn't either unless it just makes him feel good about himself? Seems counter intuitive though, i was thinking maybe he got out of a relationship and needs the self esteem boost but he knows very well that if you don't want a relationship, don't allow any room to question your intentions, so I'm leaning towards he knows what he's doing and probably likes you after all? Sounds good to me anyways, and not because I'm the one saying it either
Author SoccerPlaya Posted September 8, 2011 Author Posted September 8, 2011 I wouldn't and from the sound of him, he probably wouldn't either unless it just makes him feel good about himself? Seems counter intuitive though, i was thinking maybe he got out of a relationship and needs the self esteem boost but he knows very well that if you don't want a relationship, don't allow any room to question your intentions, so I'm leaning towards he knows what he's doing and probably likes you after all? Sounds good to me anyways, and not because I'm the one saying it either Thanks I hope you're right. I haven't felt this excited by someone in years!
visualbasicide Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 let us know how it turns out. Good luck!
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