singlelife Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 I have slept with a lot of women in relatioships and I have noticed more and more are cheating. You look on their FB page and they say how they all in love but mess around all the time. Are you guys bored, horney, or what. I do know a few told me they felt pressured to settle down and now they are stuck but like to play around.
Professor X Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Another gender based assumption... /yawn
Author singlelife Posted September 7, 2011 Author Posted September 7, 2011 They do it because men do it So they do it as a reaction to men?
visualbasicide Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 because there are a whole lot of children running around wearing grown up bodies. Both men and women, if you would call them that. They have no concept of love or commitment, they all want a relationship without the effort of maintaining one. The whole "something for nothing" mentality. Their actions will ultimately rob them of the very things they say they want out of life. Irony, poetic justice, karma, whatever name you put on it, I just call it sad.
ScienceGal Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 I have never cheated. Even when the relationship I was in was awful.
smudge21 Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 because there are a whole lot of children running around wearing grown up bodies. Both men and women, if you would call them that. They have no concept of love or commitment, they all want a relationship without the effort of maintaining one. The whole "something for nothing" mentality. Their actions will ultimately rob them of the very things they say they want out of life. Irony, poetic justice, karma, whatever name you put on it, I just call it sad. Quoted for truth!
Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Another gender based assumption... /yawn Whether you like it or not women cheat more in 2011, my friend's mum who is a very smart women doesn't even deny this, she says it used to be men but these days it's women. It's true and there is nothing wrong with saying it, it's not an assumption, at least not in my case, I am not sexist and I do not hate women but I have seen far more of them be guilty of inappropriate behaviour and cheating than I have, men. One of the reasons is... because there are a whole lot of children running around wearing grown up bodies. Both men and women, if you would call them that. They have no concept of love or commitment, they all want a relationship without the effort of maintaining one. The whole "something for nothing" mentality. Their actions will ultimately rob them of the very things they say they want out of life. Irony, poetic justice, karma, whatever name you put on it, I just call it sad. ...this post. I agree with this very much.
OriginalPenguin Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 because there are a whole lot of children running around wearing grown up bodies. Both men and women, if you would call them that. They have no concept of love or commitment, they all want a relationship without the effort of maintaining one. The whole "something for nothing" mentality. Their actions will ultimately rob them of the very things they say they want out of life. Irony, poetic justice, karma, whatever name you put on it, I just call it sad. Excellent post!
ASG Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Blah blah blah. 80% of the guys I slept/fooled around with were cheating on girlfriends or wives. I've never cheated. So there you go!
Elysian Powder Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 (edited) I have slept with a lot of women in relatioships and I have noticed more and more are cheating. You look on their FB page and they say how they all in love but mess around all the time. Are you guys bored, horney, or what. I do know a few told me they felt pressured to settle down and now they are stuck but like to play around. They're cheating more openly(women of hundreds of years ago had to hide the cads from their husbands) because in this age of enlightenment, more than enough ''men'' don't mind paying a crap load of money in that sweet divorce settlement. Women get the kids, a double paycheck per month(alimony and child-support), and a young buck to unwind those spider curtains from their poon. Why wouldn't they cheat? and I do not hate women Don't beg people's pardon for being a smart, young man. For too long have we been accused of ''hating women'' when we call them on their BS,and due to our lack of interest in being a white knight, that overly bred ''man'' that exists to romanticize women; there has to be something wrong with us! You are ''bitter'' about women, that's their favorite line. Sometimes you are the destination of the '' You only have experience with video games women'', a favorite of women aged 16-22. My particularly favorite shaming tool is the ''porn-addiction'' mantra. The fans of using this line can't deal with being replaced by digital women, lololol. Anyway, the women who shame you are usually old or ugly or just plain out average. They aren't high quality, and if the men their own age don't want anything to do with them; why would you bother with them? Edited September 7, 2011 by Elysian Powder
Saul Goodman Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 (edited) The whole "something for nothing" mentality. Their actions will ultimately rob them of the very things they say they want out of life. Irony, poetic justice, karma, whatever name you put on it, I just call it sad.I would like to believe in this. Unfortunately, that same mentality that you've suggested allows people to get away with pulling a lot of sh_t. No negative repercussions. No lessons learnt. A clean conscience. They get "robbed" of what they want but they are so confident in their ideals that they don't care. A lot of these types live incredibly happy lives. So why worry about justice when it isn't going to happen? Edited September 7, 2011 by Saul Goodman
sally4sara Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 How a 0% increase on 0 instances of cheating results in me somehow cheating more often I do not know.....but I'm not cheating more often. But as to why you hear more about women in general cheating now than (I don't know when you are comparing your current date to as far as some vague before now time) say 60 years ago - it has a pretty obvious answer. Women no longer need marriage or a relationship that might turn to marriage as much now as they did 60 years ago. They now have no more to lose than men risked by cheating so now they cheat as often as men. Its a shame and not because they are women but because it was a shame when it was mostly men who cheated and now all we got is more people cheating.
sally4sara Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Even though it might be on a slight rise... Women cheat extremley rarely. Men still cheat ALOT more than women and it's not even close. Women don't have the same need to cheat like men do. Men think women are hot and men like sex so when they're wifes aint putting out they cheat, sometimes theres no reason other to than that they could and that they had the chance to have sex with another woman. Women don't really find men physically attractive. Women don't think "damn that guy was haaawt" if they see an attractive man, they more likely don't even notice "attractive" men. Women compared to men have a relativley weak sex drive, their desire for sex simply isn't as big as mens. Cheating is about sex, pretty much. Cheating is when you kiss or have sex with another person other than your spouse. And women just don't care enough about sex to cheat. Some men really need to get over themselves with their unfounded paranoia about women cheating. It is ridicilous. No one needs to cheat, not even men. But you really need to get not over yourself so much as your head out of yourself. You've never been a woman and can know no more about a woman's sexuality than anyone of us can know the sexuality of another person. Some men have high sex drives and others have low ones. Same for women. Yes, some of us do see a fine looking man and think "daaaammmn he is haawt!". Yes the vast majority of us do care very much about sex. You are going by what Darwin, a fellow who lived in Victorian England and barely had sex himself saw around him and assumed about all animals when it comes to human sexuality. But cheating isn't the only way to get sex so cheating isn't necessary for anyone. Get it?
Elysian Powder Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 No one needs to cheat, not even men. But you really need to get not over yourself so much as your head out of yourself. You've never been a woman and can know no more about a woman's sexuality than anyone of us can know the sexuality of another person. Some men have high sex drives and others have low ones. Same for women. Yes, some of us do see a fine looking man and think "daaaammmn he is haawt!". Yes the vast majority of us do care very much about sex. You are going by what Darwin, a fellow who lived in Victorian England and barely had sex himself saw around him and assumed about all animals when it comes to human sexuality. But cheating isn't the only way to get sex so cheating isn't necessary for anyone. Get it? Cheating is a funny word? How can it have any negativity at least applicable in the real world, when human beings aren't monogamous by nature? A long, long time ago, before the rise of agriculture, everyone was ****ing everyone, and the children were raised by the community. With the installment of agriculture as our main source for food, and it's ramifications in the social life of mankind, men tried to hold some certain women for themselves, and women figured out that putting out in the context of a legal binding, an agreement that would settle them for life; marriage was created. Now we have people putting ''love'' way out of it's natural compaction, men ruined by their one-legal vagina, and women marrying for safety. Why can't we go back to ****ing everyone? Why do we deny our natures? No wonder Mankind is so unhappy; we can only **** one person at a time!
visualbasicide Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 I would like to believe in this. Unfortunately, that same mentality that you've suggested allows people to get away with pulling a lot of sh_t. No negative repercussions. No lessons learnt. A clean conscience. They get "robbed" of what they want but they are so confident in their ideals that they don't care. A lot of these types live incredibly happy lives. So why worry about justice when it isn't going to happen? There are plenty of people out there that will settle for what they thought they wanted rather than admit they made a mistake. It is not the same thing. You can usually tell who they are too. They don't fool anyone but themselves. Though I agree with the rest of that population feeling no negative repercussions but I think this is more rare than we realize. I have seen TONS of people go through the "instant happiness" cycle over and over, sure they are happy...right now. give it a while, oh my, what happens? The same thing that happened last time. Rinse, repeat. Patience is a virtue. You pay attention long enough and you see the patterns all over the place.
dasein Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Women are cheating more because technology makes it easier. Men would be cheating more also except for the fact that the courts and society at large judges male cheaters more harshly than at any time in history, and female cheaters aren't held as accountable. If he cheats, it's because he is a bastard. If she cheats, it's because... he is a bastard. Seriously it's that simple. People do what they can get away with. People aren't good by nature, and our society and government rewards weakness and bad choices more than it rewards strength and good choices.
Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Women are cheating more because technology makes it easier. Men would be cheating more also except for the fact that the courts and society at large judges male cheaters more harshly than at any time in history, and female cheaters aren't held as accountable. If he cheats, it's because he is a bastard. If she cheats, it's because... he is a bastard. Seriously it's that simple. People do what they can get away with. People aren't good by nature, and our society and government rewards weakness and bad choices more than it rewards strength and good choices. Seriously this post is spot on. I'd buy you a drink for posting that. Very good.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 In a nutshell, women have more economic freedom now then they did decades ago. More economic freedom means a woman isn't as dependent on a man for her survival. She has less to loose if she is caught with another man because she can support herself now-a-days. They also have more oppurtunities that use to be only afforeded to men for the simple fact that men worked out in the real world and more women stayed at home with the kids. I also suspect a small part of it is for the simple fact that for decades, men were more known to cheat and a lot of women justified their own cheating because of the decades that some men use to take advantage of the situation. It caused some women to be more cynical and think about their needs *first* since they saw that these other men were thinking of their own *needs* first. Of course, that last bit is really a cycle where each gender sees the other behaving more selfishly so they in turn say "screw it" and do what feels good for them. For the record, I am a woman and I have never cheated. I also do not require 'aids" of entertainment so that I can stop myself from cheating. People think the grass is always greener until they get into the other pasture.
Saul Goodman Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 There are plenty of people out there that will settle for what they thought they wanted rather than admit they made a mistake. It is not the same thing. You can usually tell who they are too. They don't fool anyone but themselves. Though I agree with the rest of that population feeling no negative repercussions but I think this is more rare than we realize. I have seen TONS of people go through the "instant happiness" cycle over and over, sure they are happy...right now. give it a while, oh my, what happens? The same thing that happened last time. Rinse, repeat. Patience is a virtue. You pay attention long enough and you see the patterns all over the place. Mixed feelings about this visual. I'll use my own stbxW as an example. She f__ked me over. That, I can live with. She f__ked our kids over. That, I find unforgivable. Does she feel any remorse? Nope. Is she happy? Yes. Is it only short-term happiness? Probably. Does that matter? Nope, not really. Right now, she's basically living the solipsistic life. Blissful ignorance. Now, many would focus on the "ignorance" part. I'm going to focus on the "blissful" part. She's happy. And when she stops being happy she'll just find some other way to be happy again, probably at the expense of others. She'll likely get away with it too. The only reason that I am neither angry nor bitter about this is because I have come to accept the fact that her lifestyle works exceedingly well for her. You could probably connect this all to the OP's question btw.
visualbasicide Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 She f__ked our kids over. That, I find unforgivable. Is it only short-term happiness? Probably. Does that matter? Nope, not really. I'm going to focus on the "blissful" part. She's happy. And when she stops being happy she'll just find some other way to be happy again, probably at the expense of others. Kudos on the post. I totally understand and agree with what you are saying. My point I suppose is that they have to struggle uphill or against the tumult their entire lives. They have to start from square one every single time. We however are forced to face reality, learn from our own history and are driven to become better, more realistic, well adjusted people because of it. The things that henceforth gives US, the betrayed, meaning and purpose to our lives, can't be snatched away, can't be bought or traded, can't be undermined by anything except ourselves. We find an equilibrium of self, a balance, that, whether they acknowledge or not, will allow us to be happy in a way that they never will.
sally4sara Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 Cheating is a funny word? How can it have any negativity at least applicable in the real world, when human beings aren't monogamous by nature? A long, long time ago, before the rise of agriculture, everyone was ****ing everyone, and the children were raised by the community. With the installment of agriculture as our main source for food, and it's ramifications in the social life of mankind, men tried to hold some certain women for themselves, and women figured out that putting out in the context of a legal binding, an agreement that would settle them for life; marriage was created. Now we have people putting ''love'' way out of it's natural compaction, men ruined by their one-legal vagina, and women marrying for safety. Why can't we go back to ****ing everyone? Why do we deny our natures? No wonder Mankind is so unhappy; we can only **** one person at a time! There is natural promiscuity and then there is cheating. One doesn't have to cause the other. I get and agree with what you say about agriculture and socially enforced monopolization of women as sexual property. I agree with the ugly aspect it wrought with feminine motivation in participating with an institution that held them back from realizing their full potentials because it seemed the safer path to their basic needs. But cheating is not what promiscuity is about. Cheating is about lying. Betrayal. Getting more than you give. Its sexual greed and an unethical approach to finding a good deal (getting something for less than you would normally have to give). All of which is part of the worst we have to offer as a species when you consider the bigger picture of human sexuality and how unnecessary it is in the obtaining of sexual pleasure. The pleasure should be the gain, not the ability to get more pleasure while denying it to someone else. Never heard anyone say "wow that was the best cock block I ever experienced". So while I do believe we tend more to promiscuity as a natural state AND believe we can to some measure of success limit ourselves to less partners, I don't believe cheating and betrayal is our natural state. Just don't agree to monogamy if you don't believe in it. Have the guts to say no if its not what you want even if it means you may not get pleasure with that particular person.
Woggle Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 The same women that justify female cheating are the ones that get up in arms over porn. Looking at a computer image is a big sin but actually sleeping with somebody else is perfectly okay and people wonder why I have a hard time letting go of my issues. I never in a million years thought I would say this but it is getting to the point where I see a man cheating and I don't even get mad anymore because chances are she is already cheating on him. It's sad that I think that way but too often reality proves me right.
visualbasicide Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 The same women that justify female cheating are the ones that get up in arms over porn. Looking at a computer image is a big sin but actually sleeping with somebody else is perfectly okay and people wonder why I have a hard time letting go of my issues. I never in a million years thought I would say this but it is getting to the point where I see a man cheating and I don't even get mad anymore because chances are she is already cheating on him. It's sad that I think that way but too often reality proves me right. LOL. Me and my ex used to have this issue, The irony is I stopped, wanted to make sure she had my sole attention, and a year later she cheated on me, go figure.
Ginger Beer Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 The same women that justify female cheating are the ones that get up in arms over porn. Looking at a computer image is a big sin but actually sleeping with somebody else is perfectly okay and people wonder why I have a hard time letting go of my issues. I never in a million years thought I would say this but it is getting to the point where I see a man cheating and I don't even get mad anymore because chances are she is already cheating on him. It's sad that I think that way but too often reality proves me right. I know what you are saying. Since I've joined this forum I've seen a lot of female justification of cheating or inappropriate behaviour when the woman is the guilty party, but there do seem to be a few decent women on this forum. Not loads, but there are a few.
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