AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 So I'm taking a yoga class, and this class is full of cute girls in it. VERY cute girls. I would like to talk to one of them, maybe form a friendship or even a relationship...but how to do it? How does a shy guy just walk up and start talking to a girl? This has failed me before, so I'd like to know how you make friends and get potential interest from girls in classes, thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
mrgoodcat Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Props to you for being comfortable enough to be the only or one of the few guys in that class. My question is, how in the world are you going to distinguish which of them is single and looking? That's the first question. Let's wait for a more expert opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Cracker Jack Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 No advice (since I'm also working towards breaking through this nonsense), but I'm glad you're making an effort towards changing. I hope the advice is solid enough to motivate you to break outta this mental prison of shyness. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Author Share Posted September 7, 2011 Yeah, I'm the only guy in the class. It's kind of intimidating. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I hate to say it, but yoga is not a very manly pursuit. That is why you are the only man in the class. If you're taking a class to meet women, I would have recommended a class that is more co-ed, or even a co-ed sports team. But you never know. It could work out. You glance at a woman's ring finger to determine if she is married. Anyone without a ring on her ring finger should be fair game to approach. Try to establish a position on the floor that is next to the person you are interested in. Then talk about the activity to the person next to you when it's acceptable to talk. You could play dumb a little bit and ask the person how one of the moves is supposed to be done. You could make comments about the exercises. You could make comments on how great it feels, or how it is benefiting you. Get used to talking to the person next to you in class. Then at the end of the class, walk out with the person and ask them, for example, "Can I interest you in lunch?" or whatever, depending on what time of day it is. The worst she could say is no thank you. Or if she has a boyfriend, she might then mention him. But that's the chance you take. If you don't take the chance, you won't get anywhere with this. No harm in asking. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Author Share Posted September 7, 2011 It may not be manly (what is manly, anyway? Beer and sports? No thanks!), but I've taken yoga before and I've enjoyed it. I've never been the only guy in the class before, though, so it is a bit intimidating. But the instructor is a man, so I doubt he's thinking it's feminine. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 It may not be manly (what is manly, anyway? Beer and sports? No thanks!), but I've taken yoga before and I've enjoyed it. I've never been the only guy in the class before, though, so it is a bit intimidating. But the instructor is a man, so I doubt he's thinking it's feminine. I hope it works out for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Author Share Posted September 7, 2011 I still need some help here. Rings on their fingers...who would wear rings to yoga? Probably, even if they were married, they'd take the rings off beforehand. I just need some openers to break down the ice. I am a shy boy, I don't make connections easily. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I still need some help here. Rings on their fingers...who would wear rings to yoga? Probably, even if they were married, they'd take the rings off beforehand. I just need some openers to break down the ice. I am a shy boy, I don't make connections easily. Most married women don't take their rings off. Check the ring finger before approaching anyone. As I suggested, talk about the yoga. Pretend you need help on how to do some of the moves, and ask the person next to you if you are doing it right. Compliment the person next to you on how well they are doing it. Make comments about the different exercises. Ask her if she's ever taken a yoga class before. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Author Share Posted September 7, 2011 Also, judging, that I get up the nerve to even say hi to these women. Did you read the part where I said I'm a shy boy? Link to post Share on other sites
UpDownAllAround Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Dude do you realize how many guys would kill to be in your situation? A 5:1 ratio of (cute) women to guys????? Your luck has changed man. Embrace the amazingly great fortune. Link to post Share on other sites
Scottdmw Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Congratulations on getting out in an environment where you can meet women. However, I’ve found that yoga classes are on the difficult side for meeting people. There is only a short window of acceptable conversation at the beginning of the class, and even then it's kind of a silent atmosphere. If you are really just interested in yoga by all means keep going. However, if you would also like to meet women you would do better in a different activity that encourages interaction. Link to post Share on other sites
iris219 Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I would LOVE to meet someone in my yoga classes. There's never been a single man in my class (except when one of the regulars brings her teenage grandson ). OP, yoga is not just for women. There are men in my classes, but they're all married (or gay ). Several of the men in my classes are athletes (long distance runners, triathletes) because yoga is good for sore muscles. Get there early, sit by a girl, and chat about the class. Ask her questions. Make sure you go regularly, so you seem serious about yoga, not about hitting on women. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Make it a point to be outgoing. Be proactive where you can by pitching your name and saying hello. You have to put women at ease with you and if you walk around mum, they'll form their own opinions--often not good ones. Don't go too far either and overdo it. Use savoir faire. Good luck. (I wish I would have given myself this advice many moons ago but I was a bundle of nerves like most other dweebs.) Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Get there early, sit by a girl, and chat about the class. Ask her questions. Make sure you go regularly, so you seem serious about yoga, not about hitting on women. I agree. I attend a workout class that few men go to. I was next to this one guy that started laughing because one of the exercises was pretty difficult. So then I started laughing. If I saw him again before class, he (or I) could easily strike up a conversation about how tough that was. Just be there and be nice. Smile and be approachable. If you're there early, you can simply be stretching and ask the woman how she likes the class, if she has taken others, you can tell her about ones you've taken. Get that far to start with SO glad you're getting out there! Link to post Share on other sites
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I hate to say it, but yoga is not a very manly pursuit. And what brought you to this enlightened opinion? The millions of men who regularly practice it in Asian countries would really love to know. I'm interested in yoga, but I find it somewhat boring as compared to goal-oriented sports so I don't do it as much as I'd like. Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I would say that the women in the class fall between a spectrum of Iris (thrilled if a guy took yoga and approached her) and KathyM (suspicious of guys in her class as either being effeminate or "just there to hit on girls"). Talk about yoga, and "why you are there". Hopefully it is to "add some flexibility to the weightlifting" you are doing or it is "to recover from an injury" (you know, something masculine), instead of "to hit on girls". Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Yoga is tough, and it will get you in great shape btw. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I hate to say it, but yoga is not a very manly pursuit. I think a man doing yoga is sexy. Link to post Share on other sites
GivenUp0083 Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Your zone here is throwing out bones and hoping you get one back. You're not going to lay it on thick or they will label you as the creeper in the class. You're there for your own reason, to be in better shape and gain flexibility, but you're friendly so you will throw out short one-liners just to try and spark a conversation. Whisper to the girl next to you "Have you done this before? This is my first time...." Look at their t-shirts, look for something you recognize: "oh hey, you went to Michigan? So did I, what did you study?" Throw out funny comments that aren't directed at anyone, sort of as a thinking-out-loud sort of thing and see if anyone laughs or responds "Well this sure beats going to chiropractor!" Just be positive, smile at people in the class if you make eye contact, or even just say "hi". At first your goal is to just start conversation. Then once you are at the point where you can talk to them before/after class each week, then you can proposition them with a "hey, you wanna grab a coffee with me?" or "hey, what are you up to this weekend? I have these **** tickets, do you wanna come with?" Link to post Share on other sites
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 I think a man doing yoga is sexy. It gets you in more closely in touch with your body, mind, and soul. I suppose that's not as macho as manly pursuits such as bashing other guys with hockey sticks, kicking sand in the face of scrawny guys at the beach, or scarfing potato chips and beer while watching football on the couch, though. Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Show up early, hang around late. The ones who are interested in meeting you will seem to "be around" and near you. Talk to all of them, pretty, homely, old, young. Start with "Good morning/afternoon" nothing more. Don't try to act "serene" or meditative, but cut up and have fun without being disruptive... not during the class proper, a small dose of class clown could do wonders for you ("when do we learn to lay on a bed of nails/walk on coals/levitate? is that today?") without being zany or overboard. Link to post Share on other sites
sm1tten Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 Yoga can be a toughie because it's kind of a quiet pursuit, and there are going to be women who are suspicious of your intentions there or just don't want to interact as much as there will be women who want to meet new people. I think the best advice someone gave is to small talk your neighbors because it can be down non-intrusively and you can work your way around to various people with each class. Since you're shy, start with smiling at someone. If she smiles back, say hi. One step at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted September 7, 2011 Share Posted September 7, 2011 It gets you in more closely in touch with your body, mind, and soul. I suppose that's not as macho as manly pursuits such as bashing other guys with hockey sticks, kicking sand in the face of scrawny guys at the beach, or scarfing potato chips and beer while watching football on the couch, though. Guys that try to be too macho are overcompensating for something. And being a bully is just a complete turnoff. Any man that is into physical exercise and know what he likes and takes pride in doing it (whether it be yoga, hockey or something esle) is a BIG turn on. Just be you and don't be ashamed of it. Passion and confidence are key. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AHardDaysNight Posted September 7, 2011 Author Share Posted September 7, 2011 I do it for relaxation and as a stress reliever. For that, it's great. That being said, it's obvious I'm not new to it, because I was doing an exercise that the professor hadn't taught me the first day of class (and doing it well.) But my intention in signing up for yoga was NOT to meet girls...although it helps that there are a lot of cute girls in the class. Link to post Share on other sites
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