sbradford2 Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 Now I'm even more confused. I just spoke with my kids father and realized that he really doesn't want a relationship with me. I asked him what was this all about him contacting me and letting me know that he missed "us" and he said that he would like to spend time with me and the kids just not be with me. What am I suppose to make of this. I am so hurt right now. Those feelings of "I'm not good enough" are starting to come back after talking to him. Whenever I tell him how I'm feeling or asking him about his intentions he always rushes me off the phone. He says that he loves me but that we cannot be together just right now and that we will have to wait for that. I feel like a fool. I had just started to feel better after our breakup and now I'm back to square one. I don't know how I let this happen. I always told myself that if he called I would just ignore the call. But he sent me a message saying that he misses me and the kids. If he misses me then why do I have to wait for him to want a relationship with me? He says that he doesn't want the things that we were going through to keep happening. In which I agree but what is it that he wants me to wait on?
Jdw_Icequeen Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 Going to be completley honest with you.. It sounds to me like he is seeing someone else. He misses you because you have a history together aswell as kids.He wants his cake and eat to.. He will get his fill of the family life while being free to be with or do whatever he wants on the side. I know it hurts but your the only one that can put a stop to it. If sends you anymore of those messages put your foot down and say I don't want to hear that crap anymore. When letting him see his kids, he dosen't need to be around you to do so. Let him take his kids out for a while. If you have asked if there is someone else and he has told you no of course he isn't going to be honest with you. He still has feelings for you and he may even think in the back of his mind he will keep you on the back burner incase he changes his mind. Its very likley he is as confused as you are but in being such he will take you for a emotional ride that you are better off without.. Don't take any chances. I haven't read your back stories.. But thats what I get out of what you have said. He will continue to drag you though the mud as long as you let him.. Its tough but you can do it. You deserve better.
Mcnulty Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 Hate to say it, but I agree with Jdw...sounds like he is keeping you in reserve while he has his cake. Think you should ask him about this and truly stand your ground. he iether wants you and the kids back as a package or you sort out arrangements for him seeing them. Hypothetically if he is just haveing reservations about your past problems or if he has another waiting in the wings, the soonest you're going to get closure is to stand your ground and do as above. I wish you luck.
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