livingitup23 Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 My ex was meant to contact me saturday and meet up with me on tuesday so she let me down twice. I said i would get her stuff for her- birthday presents for her dad but I havent because I've had enough of her treating me shabbily. Why do I like her so much.All she's ever done is treat me like im a piece of string? Anyway she's told me we are done now and that i've done too much. I can't handle being friends with her but I don't want her out of my life so I've texted her saying sorry I will go and get your stuff for you and that I want to be friends with her so much and that I will change. I also told her that she has my number and that she can get in touch. I want her back so much but I can't be dealing with the fact that she has treated me so shabbily. Do you think that's it now? We have been split up for four months and I can't take anymore of this contact but I know I miss her too much. What should I do. She hasnt replied to me but it's a pattern. What if she does? She doesnt take anything I say seriously because it's just a pattern of me saying sorry you have just hurt me but I'm just sick of her treating me like im nothing but an errand boy and someone she can have a drink with when she's bored. Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Are we done now?
without Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 Tell us more details what caused it?also i think as hard as it may sound but pay attention to yourself and take time for yourself ,have fun,heal ...clear your mind to see what's wrong and what's right..
Author livingitup23 Posted September 5, 2011 Author Posted September 5, 2011 I'm not actually sure. My insecurities, her behaviour with me. her past history with her ex who was also my mate, the fact that she didnt want to go on holiday and the fact that she went cold on me pretty quickly down to me sending her "whiny texts" caused by her unwillingness to commit to me. Now she doesnt even want to be friends because I said I'd get her dads stuff but I had enough of being treated like rubbish. I cant deal with friends to be honest. I want to be more than that. And she's just happy texting me and meeting up every two weeks and I've had enough. It's not allowing me to move on but then I miss her like mad. So it's a catch 22. The most I've gone is 2 weeks without texting her after splitting from her. I know if she doesnt have feelings for me then thats fair enough but she knows I love her like mad so why does she treat me in such a bad way. Like saying she will meet me and then not turning up and even then saying she would maybe give us a 2nd chance in the future. Enough's enough to be fair but I will go crazy waiting for that text and that chance she wants me back. Oh and she also met up with that ex and told me about it and that they are in conctact every day. So does she expect me to be happy about it?
without Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 I know how you feel,i myself also have the urge to clear everything ..you should make it clear ,does she want you?is she going to keep treating you badly?is she worth your love?you deserve someone who treats you well.but do anything to understand the situation then you can heal,if she doesn't love you ,you will start the healing and the acceptance..but if you're sooo confused you will only get worse.
without Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 That's my point of view ,people here may tell you to go no contact and start healing. But for me i need to be sure of what's going on first.eventhough sometimes you'll never know what's for sure...but to some extent you will.
Author livingitup23 Posted September 5, 2011 Author Posted September 5, 2011 I wrote her a letter a couple of months ago telling her my feelings. She told me she didnt want me but that her feelings may grow in the future. I think deep down I know it's over so there you go. She hasnt replied to my last text and I don't want to be someone's puppet. I need to go no contact I think but how do I stop thinking about her and how do I get rid of the butterfly?
without Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 I'm not gonna lie to you,it will be hard and it takes time,you need to be around your friends,new hobbies,studying...keep yourself busy..Also exercising is great.They will help you.but healing is a process.and you will make it,just be patient my friend.
silly_panda Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 livingitup23... I've been following your story actually... Man... That's a sh*tty situation to be in... Deep down you know it's already over... So let it go... She is really having a lot of power over you rite now... You really need to get your dignity and self respect back... Yeap... Like without said... It's hard to let go of someone that you love... But life goes on and you gotta... You got a big responsibility to yourself and your family... So it's better to move on sooner than later... How do you get ride of the feelings..? I would say... Choice... We all have a choice to do something... Rite now, you chose to think about her all the time... It's just all about choice... How you wanna live your life..? What you wanna feel today..? Are you going to let her go..? Do you wanna move on or not..? In these kinda situation people just tend to choose to do or feel something that will hurt them... Why..? In my opinion, cause it's easy to do... Dwell in the sadness and not doing anything... It's easy... What's hard is to actually stand up and walk again... It's a matter of choice and what you choose to do... I hope this helps... Hang in there man...
sun_moon Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 If you are really interested in healing and feeling better then NC is your salvation. It does wonders my friend. You have to stick to it, and let me tell you that most of us have failed at it miserably in the beginning. Does that mean we stop trying? NO. It means you try and try again until it becomes your normal life style, and one day you wake up and realize..... OMG I didn't wake up thinking about my ex OMG I didn't go to sleep thinking about my ex It takes time but it will get there! You have to want it, you have to accept that it is over, and mostly you have to have hope for yourself and none for the old relationship. Looks like you've been whipped aruond long enough by this heartless girl, take your dignity back and fight back. You can do this. Everytime you feel weak and compelled, you have to come here instead. How many threads have you read on NC, temptation, and the amount of time, its a struggle, but the long term affects are wonderful.
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