bluenightowl Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 Haven't talked to her all day, then just got a text saying "Hey stranger!" Ughhhh This is good! She's coming to you.
Author ScottSummers Posted September 6, 2011 Author Posted September 6, 2011 This is good! She's coming to you. I don't know. She said it felt like we hadn't talked in a while and it was only one day. So I guess that's good. I don't know if I should continue on or finally ask her whats going on between us
bluenightowl Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 I don't know. She said it felt like we hadn't talked in a while and it was only one day. So I guess that's good. I don't know if I should continue on or finally ask her whats going on between us It might be good to talk to her I agree. The good part is you are old friends, so you have some history already and I suspect some level of trust and its been a while now. I suspect her emotions might still be confused from the breakup but you would know better than us. If you talk to her, just be mentally prepared that she might say she doesn't know what she wants, she's scared of getting into a relationship (with you), who knows. Or she might be into it.
phineas Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 Im re-posting this because I think its the most accurate. You killed her challenge, and she wasnt really that into you in the first place, because youre a rebound. Back off, and see if she will work for you. if not, then you know what the deal is. Ya know what? A woman that needs a challenge is a train wreck in my opinion and usually has a history of dating "bad-boys" that constantly make her feel like she isn't good enough for them.
Author ScottSummers Posted September 8, 2011 Author Posted September 8, 2011 Well for those of you who care, we finally had a talk about things. She stands by she doesnt want a relationship right now and I actually believe her. I don't know if I'm being naive or not. I'm not saying I think we are going to get together soon, but I do believe she actually cares about me. I don't think shes just messing with my head and "is being nice" Who knows though
bluenightowl Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 Well for those of you who care, we finally had a talk about things. She stands by she doesnt want a relationship right now and I actually believe her. I don't know if I'm being naive or not. I'm not saying I think we are going to get together soon, but I do believe she actually cares about me. I don't think shes just messing with my head and "is being nice" Who knows though It's hard to tell from here. She may not know how she is feeling clearly and so when she says she doesn't want a relationship right now, the usual completion of the sentence is "she doesn't want a relationship right now (with you)" I would back off now. Definitely don't expect anything. She could easily be using you for attention (sub consciously) until someone else comes along or until she is ready for a relationship. Just remember you need to protect you first.
AHardDaysNight Posted September 8, 2011 Posted September 8, 2011 I agree, you've been friendzoned badly, buddy.
Author ScottSummers Posted September 9, 2011 Author Posted September 9, 2011 I agree, you've been friendzoned badly, buddy. Hahahaha, yeah I actually asked her if I've been friend zoned. That's how I how started the conversation. Of course she said no, what else would she say?
phineas Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Well for those of you who care, we finally had a talk about things. She stands by she doesnt want a relationship right now and I actually believe her. I don't know if I'm being naive or not. I'm not saying I think we are going to get together soon, but I do believe she actually cares about me. I don't think shes just messing with my head and "is being nice" Who knows though I gotta tell you, she is probably banging someone. When it comes to women like this you have to ask, "is she sleeping with you?, then who is she sleeping with?" women like sex just as much as men. women seek a man's attention because they want to have sex with that man. She doesn't want to have sex with you. Why then is she seeking your attention? I just had a situation. Woman acting the same way yours did, very flirty, I asked her out though when she acted into me. She agreed then flaked. A few days later I sent her a txt to see what she was doing. No response. Obviously she isn't into me. so, why was she seeking my attention? Attention whore. That night, I ran into her with another guy. LOL! Dude looked like a pro bodybuilder. She's single according to her. Well, if she isn't sleeping with this guy then one of them is gay because women do not ignore men their into to go grocery shopping with a guy their "just friends" with. Understand? If she wants to be "friends" go to bars with her, use her for validation purposes, other women will see you with her & be interested if she's attractive. Use that to flirt with them. She should be pulling women for you. that is what friends do! watch her reactions, if she cock-blocks boot her. She can't have it both ways. She either wants to officially date you or you are just friends. 9/10 times she just wants you to be her personal lap-dog. In my case, I'm not anyone's lap-dog & if my "friend" tries to cock-block me i'll crack a joke and say "hey!, I saw her first!" They usually realize they cannot make me their lap-dog & just fade away never really interested in being friends. with women like this THEY have to choose to fade away because they absolutely will not leave you alone & use every guilt-trip they can think of to get you from fading away.
Author ScottSummers Posted September 9, 2011 Author Posted September 9, 2011 I gotta tell you, she is probably banging someone. When it comes to women like this you have to ask, "is she sleeping with you?, then who is she sleeping with?" women like sex just as much as men. women seek a man's attention because they want to have sex with that man. She doesn't want to have sex with you. Why then is she seeking your attention? I just had a situation. Woman acting the same way yours did, very flirty, I asked her out though when she acted into me. She agreed then flaked. A few days later I sent her a txt to see what she was doing. No response. Obviously she isn't into me. so, why was she seeking my attention? Attention whore. That night, I ran into her with another guy. LOL! Dude looked like a pro bodybuilder. She's single according to her. Well, if she isn't sleeping with this guy then one of them is gay because women do not ignore men their into to go grocery shopping with a guy their "just friends" with. Understand? If she wants to be "friends" go to bars with her, use her for validation purposes, other women will see you with her & be interested if she's attractive. Use that to flirt with them. She should be pulling women for you. that is what friends do! watch her reactions, if she cock-blocks boot her. She can't have it both ways. She either wants to officially date you or you are just friends. 9/10 times she just wants you to be her personal lap-dog. In my case, I'm not anyone's lap-dog & if my "friend" tries to cock-block me i'll crack a joke and say "hey!, I saw her first!" They usually realize they cannot make me their lap-dog & just fade away never really interested in being friends. with women like this THEY have to choose to fade away because they absolutely will not leave you alone & use every guilt-trip they can think of to get you from fading away. I get what you're saying, but she never said she wanted to be just friends.
phineas Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 I get what you're saying, but she never said she wanted to be just friends. So she wants to keep you in limbo paying attention to her. Go ahead, do that. Wait until you hang out with another woman. She probably won't like that. But I bet she will hang out with other men. Hang out with her, but DO NOT ignore other women for her. That is what she wants. To get you treating her like a GF & her not giving anything in return (not just talking a bout sex either) I hope i'm wrong, but i've met WAY too many women like this & every time their secretly sleeping with an ex who only pays attention to them when their naked. I didn't know at the time exactly what was up with these women, but when my gut tells me something is shady, I listen to it & it is ALWAYS right. What does YOUR gut say?
iJester Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 (edited) Cease all contact with her. Next time she sends a ' hey stranger' text, ask her not to contact you anymore unless she's ready to date you, wish her luck in healing, and be on your way. Mention that you need to start looking for other women as well. Stop being her emotional tampon. She's using emotionally for whatever reason, cut her off, and let her know you have zero interest in friendship. Edited September 9, 2011 by iJester
bluenightowl Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Cease all contact with her. Next time she sends a ' hey stranger' text, ask her not to contact you anymore unless she's ready to date you, wish her luck in healing, and be on your way. Mention that you need to start looking for other women as well. Stop being her emotional tampon. She's using emotionally for whatever reason, cut her off, and let her know you have zero interest in friendship. I agree completely with this. If you really want her to be attracted to you, you have to let go to let her to come to you. I once said I had zero interest in being friends to a woman. 2 weeks later she called me up and it turned into an 8 year relationship. What was also great is another woman wanted to date me at the same time, so I never got clingy. Never take the bait. I think this whole concept of attention whore is completely right, and the only way you'll look confident is by standing up for what is right for you. If you have never tried this before, I'd recommend trying it as tough as it is, it will be worth it.
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