maylis Posted September 4, 2011 Posted September 4, 2011 I never thought I would be doing something like joining a forum but here goes. I guess I am just wondering what other people would do in this situation. I am just about 30 and I was dating a guy for a short time (not even two months). It was my first try at a relationship in some time, I was always too scared (my last one was a 5 year relationship and it ended about two and a half years ago). It was the first time in that two and a half years where I truly felt like I connected with someone and was interested enough to form a real relationship. He's a really shy guy and I believe he lacks some confidence in himself but I can be shy too so I could relate to him even more and it never bothered me. I actually found it really charming, in the city I live in I seem to be surrounded by arrogant jerks. Anyway he ended up wanting to break up because he told me he is too scared to be in a relationship. We didn't talk for about 2 weeks after and I had contacted then him to see if he wanted something back that he had borrowed me because I knew it was important to him etc. He asked if I was doing ok and I said I was a bit confused and he agreed we could talk. We met a week later and he couldn't really tell me much more, just an example he said it freaked him out that I left a couple things at his apartment. I didn't want to talk to him for awhile after this because it seemed so ...immature or something I guess. More time went by and I said I think it's cool if we are friends and he agreed. He has been on holidays with his family all summer though so we have not seen each other. We have texted a few times back and forth, but really I can't stop thinking about him. I have gone on several dates over the summer and it ends up pushing me back towards him because I really have a hard time to find things in common apparently and it has to be more interesting than finding a person physically attractive. I feel quite ridiculous because we were not together that long, I was not in love but I can't stop thinking about him and really we have such a similar life style, outlook, and so so many things in common. It is rare I can open up to someone the way I was able to with him even in such a short time. Is it crazy to be like this, would you try to make it work again with such a short history? I've never tried persuing anyone after we have broken up, from both sides of it.
Nohbody Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 It's not unusual if you've been out of the game so long. Unfortunately it didn't work out. There are, as they say, more fish in the sea. The longer you focus all of your attention on this one (by no means a sure thing) the more the others are slipping through your net. Try not contacting him for a while and see what he does.
mike588 Posted September 5, 2011 Posted September 5, 2011 Yes, don't contact him for a short while and see what happens.if you don't hear from him give him a call, you have nothing to lose because it's been such a short time relationship. You say u cant stop thinking about him,,, well then give it a try.
Author maylis Posted September 5, 2011 Author Posted September 5, 2011 I think you are both right, I will wait maybe a month or something. I know his birthday is the end of this month..maybe I will contact him after that. Would it be weird to say happy birthday? I don't know. I guess I will just go slow, I am trying to do the opposite of my instincts because I can be really impatient and impulsive. Thank you
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