Misar7 Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 Portisphish, yes I did but it hurts to think after 8 yrs and everything we went through, he just walked away and got some young girl pregnant. I have even sadly had thoughts of I should have just gotten pregnant he would still be here! STUPID I KNOW!! Lessons Learnt, yes I understand what you are saying! Same here we were together for 8 yrs, and he is horrible with money, still is he does not have his own place is now living with his mom, the girl she is 23 he is 30, I am 34, she lives in an small apt. with no bedrooms. He has horrible credit and not a steady stable income yet, as he just started selling insurance and got his license only thanks to his sister, who paid for it all and owns her own agency, before that my dad gave him a job for yrs! Basically everything this man has, has been given to him, his car, his jobs, his cell phone..this girl she works at a gas station, unless he changes A LOT and soon, them two are gonna have a lot of trouble!! That was my whole deal I wanted him to become more stable, and us have a commitment then have the baby..nope he wanted baby NOW! He said oh I have 9 months to get the money! LOL Oh wow! I also wanted him to stop smoking so much weed, but now he got with a girl who smokes as much as him! To top it all off, my brother married his sister who they met through us 7 yrs ago! SO yea this girl, him, and the baby, I will not be able to escape, as our families are connected! Facebook has become HORRIBLE for me, this girl is posting on his sister and brothers page and going on and on about how lucky she is, how he is the most amazing man, they are both soooooooo happy!! I am upset at his sister as she is totally supporting these two and knowing what he did to me after 8 yrs, and all the things I went through with pregnancy! GRRRRR!! I am hating things right now! And he acts as if I am dead to him now, not a single word from him as if what he did is fine! They all make me sick!!
Author katie.x Posted September 7, 2011 Author Posted September 7, 2011 I would avoid posting your email addresses in this forum. You are really setting yourself up to get spammed. I made it for this site only, don't worry
Author katie.x Posted September 7, 2011 Author Posted September 7, 2011 You know katie.X, I don't mean to sound delusional but when my ex dumped me the description of "rebound" sounds like his situation now. Except like you said being that he went back to his prior girlfriend before me, maybe they had some leftover feelings or realization that they wanted to be together. But it got intense very quickly (we were not that way at all) and we did not deal with our issues- at least not together. Well, maybe you weren't a rebound, just an in between relationship? How quickly did you get together with him? Maybe this guy just started to miss his ex or they saw it other randomly and the feelings all came back. I really couldn't tell as I don't know the whole story. I agree Mike sounds588 sounds more like a classic rebound situation. Your ex probably genuinely wanted to move on (as I think mine did) and did not set out to "use" you. But I just feel like you cannot compete with an old flame until they get that out of their system. Unforunately this comes at the expense of another person's feelings. That's exactly it, an old flame, there is still something there. And it does suck for the rebound because their emotions are real, they are in the relationship for the right reason. It's just a situation that comes with too many complications that I hope I never do, I never want to hurt someone like that.
Author katie.x Posted September 7, 2011 Author Posted September 7, 2011 Katie, I tryed to send you an email at katiej.x@gmail.com.au but got a error massage,mail not sent. Whoops! It's only .com not .com.au
Author katie.x Posted September 7, 2011 Author Posted September 7, 2011 My ex of 8 yrs well he wanted kids so did I, I lost a few pregnancies and we were talking of trying again here recently..but I wanted a commitment first, cause at the time he had broken up with me and we were starting to see each other again and he wanted to get me pregnant, I said commitment first, he acted all hurt...one week later he hooked up with some young party girl, he got her pregnant that first week! She is now 6 wks pregnant! Rebound? Or just wanted a baby that bad? Who knows she had just got out of a relationship herself also..they have now both just dived in head first into a full blown relationship with a baby on the way all in a matter of one month! Oh wow, you poor thing, what a selfish person this guy is! You are fair better off without him though. It definitely sounds like a rebound on both sides. Both out of relationships and using a child to hold a very quick relationship together. This just sounds like a big old mess. You need to run from this man and never look back.
Portisphish Posted September 7, 2011 Posted September 7, 2011 I feel bad. I didn't mean to belittle your pain or hurt. 8 years is a long time. I know how much pain I have been in losing a relationship after only 1 year. I'm sorry you are hurting. We talk about moving on, and needing to go no contact, but I don't know if this is an absolute. For your situation, it's easy for me to look at it from a distance and see how much better off you are without him, but I know it's not that easy when you are in the middle of it. Plus you have to deal with him being around because of your family situation. Sounds like no contact is impossible. You just have to try and look at the big picture and see the situation like we are seeing it, because it is clear to us. You did dodge a bullet....you know this....you know having his child would not have been the right thing for you. You deserve what you want, especially when what you want isn't unreasonable. You will get what you want with the right person. Keep on going. You can do it.
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