Ariana717 Posted September 4, 2011 Posted September 4, 2011 (edited) My stories pretty long, so ill keep this short. My boyfriend of a year broke up with me in June. We would talk here and there, I guess, but each time would be horrble for me because I would just brng up the break up and he would say he didn't want to break up with me but that we couldn't be together. He would always keep me holding on, always making me feel like there was hope that wed get back together, but I think I know we never will. Before today we went weeks without talking. I was damn sure I was never going to hear from him again. But today I went on my facebook and there was a message from him. This is how it went. Him: you don't have to respond to this but I would really like it if we could be friends. I understand if you don't want to talk to me." Me: you really just want to be friends? Him: id rather talk to you somewhat then not at all Me: I don't know. It still hurts. Him: I understand. Maybe someday? Me: idk. I have to think about this. I don't know what to do. All day long I've been thinking about what I should do. Every one I asked told me not to be friends with him. Half of me is thinking "well id rather have him in my life as a friend then not have him in my life at all" and the other half is saying "you're so stupid! Don't you dare be friends with him after everything he's done." I love him and miss him so much. And I know that if I be friends with him it will probably do more damage than anything. And especially if I see/hear he's with another girl. I wouldn't be able to take that. But at the same time, I want him in my life. And I have this stupid little speck of hope that maybe if were friends, hell want to be together again. I don't know what to do. I'm so torn. What do you guys think? Would you rather be friends with the person you fell hardest for , or nothing at all? Edited September 4, 2011 by Ariana717
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted September 4, 2011 Posted September 4, 2011 you ended the conversation saying you'll have to think about this. That means there is no time constraint for him to expect an answer. Continue with NC, maybe someday when you feel indifferent towards him you can decide whether or not you can be friends with him. Until then... remain NC.
GinaM Posted September 4, 2011 Posted September 4, 2011 You dont need to be friends with him for many reasons (Read about NC) My ex wanted the same but I made clear no way. I said I loved you and I dont need you as a friend. May be we can be friends in the future after many years. But for now there is no way we can be friends. I think the best way for all dumpees is NC You have to be strong
M2155 Posted September 4, 2011 Posted September 4, 2011 I agree with the previous posters. You pretty much just convinced me that you're not ready to be just friends. You don't want "friends" to lead to something anyway because it won't be what you deserve. If he misses you now, he'll miss you enough to pursue you as a girlfriend in the future if he really wants you in his life. It sounds like he wants to keep you around, maybe he has doubt, maybe he just wants comfort, but neither of those are what you want. You do not owe him a response. You had the last word and he is left wondering. Let him.
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