bofferman Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 My ex and I have been talking back and forth for a few days and have hungout o few nights. we have been broke up for about 3 months and had about 5 weeks no contact.let me preface this by saying i think she has G.I.G.S. i go to her place last night and we chat and have some drinks. The more we drink the more she starts talking about our relationship and how much she loves and misses me and thinks about me every day. I dont act weak but i do reciprocate and try to plat it cool. I do tell her that I hope she is not stringing me along, because that is not fair and if she loved me she would not do that. I never ask her if she has seen anybody since the breakup but i think there have been a few guys in and out of her life in this short time. She tells me she needed space and needed to be her and live for her and have her own things and that she thinks she is getting close to feeling like she has accomplished these things. Anyways earlier in the evening I ask her to on a date. I say this Friday I want to take you out. Dont worry about where just make sure you are wearing that sexy red dress. She smiles and agrees. We have hung out 2 nights this week one at mine and one at hers. Not sure if I will see her tonight but really dont think I should. I am second guessing the date. not sure if it is to soon. She will not commit to plans with me usually so that is a good thing. I just get the feeling that she is hiding parts of her life from me still. Is a date a good way to show her a good time... She told me I should ask her on a date because the other night when she was over that she missed the house and that we have to work this out. On the flip side I feel like she should be the one coming back to me and asking me out. How do I break the date.. Just feel like I need to get back to NC. Getting a little aprehensive about regressing back to where I was because I have some of the "bad" feelings I had after the break up.. Any help on this one I know I rambled and scrambled but hope the point came across
leoc1973 Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 This is a tough one. If you break the date it might give her a wakeup call and she might start chasing you around again but if she doesn't give it a second chance you will regret it for a long time. If part of her reason for breaking up with you is that you never kept plans then she will be totally reminded of one of your bad qualities so that will be really bad for you. Good luck and keep us posted.
Author bofferman Posted September 1, 2011 Author Posted September 1, 2011 thanks... never keeping plans was never a problem that we had... so maybe i should say something came up.. your right though i put myself in a tough spot by asking
flitzanu Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 actually, you've left one thing out. did you say "i want to take you on a DATE ON FRIDAY" or did you simply say "i want to take you out on friday" if you said DATE, then you're doing well. if not, then it isn't a date.
Author bofferman Posted September 1, 2011 Author Posted September 1, 2011 Sorry let me clarify... I said i am taking you on a date of Friday night.. and she agreed... also after re reading the post both of the nights we hung out were overnights and we had sex both times...does that change anything...
flitzanu Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 Sorry let me clarify... I said i am taking you on a date of Friday night.. and she agreed... also after re reading the post both of the nights we hung out were overnights and we had sex both times...does that change anything... well, as long as you named it as a "date" and she agreed, that in itself is not a "bad" thing. i wouldn't take it to mean everything is going to be perfect, but at least she was open to a real date. girls/guys alike will ALWAYS play the semantics game...you've just got to be very specific with your words, don't leave them open for interpretation.
DenumChkn Posted September 6, 2011 Posted September 6, 2011 If your gut and heart both tell you it's a bad idea, it probably is.. If you have already gotten over her then I would just move on. If you feel she deserves a second chance then go for it, but move SLOW. Make sure you're not the only one making changes to accommodate a better relationship - it must be a task taken up by both partners (and a daunting one at that). Best of luck and let us know how it goes.
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