FrustratedStandards Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 A lot of women I know struggle with opening up sexually because of their "down there" situation. The thing is, shaving leaves in grown hairs most of the time, and usually they look like pimples. Waxing helps but not all that much. How important is it for a man to have a woman be absolutely perfect down there? I have seen x-rated films where the woman is FLAWLESS, not a pimple, not a hair, not even a hair follicle is visible. Of course this is attractive, but is this what men usually expect? How big of a turn off is it if a woman has this in-grown hair problem? Because I know it's a big confidence problem for many women. Just wondering what the man's take on this is?
fortyninethousand322 Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Personally, I have no idea exactly what I'd prefer (big surprise there). A friend of mine used to suggest to women (after they asked) that they get waxed. All of the women who took his advice later came back and thanked him for the advice (apparently their sex lives got a lot better). Anecdotal evidence to be sure, but that's all I got for you.
Emilia Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 The guys will comment of course but in my experience men don't give two hoots about ingrown hair - although I have never had that much of a problem. Waxing is best I think, if you scrub regularly (about 3 x a week), that will help the ingrown hair issue a huge amount. I use those rough gloves you can buy at chemists, use them dry on the skin so they scrub stronger. You can also use clean (sterile) tweezers to tease ingrown hair out.
Elysian Powder Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 A lot of women I know struggle with opening up sexually because of their "down there" situation. The thing is, shaving leaves in grown hairs most of the time, and usually they look like pimples. Waxing helps but not all that much. How important is it for a man to have a woman be absolutely perfect down there? I have seen x-rated films where the woman is FLAWLESS, not a pimple, not a hair, not even a hair follicle is visible. Of course this is attractive, but is this what men usually expect? How big of a turn off is it if a woman has this in-grown hair problem? Because I know it's a big confidence problem for many women. Just wondering what the man's take on this is? Get a Brazilian wax done by a woman with experience in the subject. You end up with a pubic area as if you've never had pubic hair.
TigerCub Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I'm with Emilia: Waxing + Exfoliating = Awesomeness "down there"
Author FrustratedStandards Posted September 1, 2011 Author Posted September 1, 2011 Get a Brazilian wax done by a woman with experience in the subject. You end up with a pubic area as if you've never had pubic hair. I have been doing this for years and I still have the same problem. It's not as bad as when I used to shave of course, but it's still present.
TigerCub Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I have been doing this for years and I still have the same problem. It's not as bad as when I used to shave of course, but it's still present. Really? How often do you get the waxing done? do you exfoliate? Are you sure the person you go to actually knows what they're doing and don't break the hair instead of waxing it all off?
Author FrustratedStandards Posted September 1, 2011 Author Posted September 1, 2011 Really? How often do you get the waxing done? do you exfoliate? Are you sure the person you go to actually knows what they're doing and don't break the hair instead of waxing it all off? Yes, she's very good, believe me. I go about once every 4 weeks. I exfoliate not as often as I should but I still do. Thing is, I have very sensitive skin. Even when I don't have many ingrowns, the skin doesn't look as white and natural. It still has dark spots because the hair underneath the skin hasn't broken through the surface. So my skin looks darker even though it isn't. Ugh! Even when i'm in a relationship this prevents me from having sex, even with my partner knowing my problem. It makes me want to cry. And I can't afford laser hair removal, which I think would be my only solution at this point.
xxoo Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Why not just trim it close, but not to the skin? Use a hair trimmer, with a guard. Or just be very, very careful with scissors There is nothing inherently unsexy about pubic hair. Right now waxed/shaved is the style, but it has not always been the preference. Be your own woman, confidently, and find a man who appreciates that about you
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I prefer leaving the hair in general--I don't get the idea of shaving all or most of it off, women don't have much to look at on the outside like guys, so if you take the hair, part of the landscape looks missing. It's like most new housing developments where they hack all the trees down before building the houses...if they'd just leave some natural landscape it'd look a lot better. Yea, raking leaves is a pain, but it's worth it. I'm sure if I were a woman I'd wax when bathing suit time comes.
Lucky_One Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I have seen pictures of naked women that they post themselves (or their men post them) on an internet site. Many, if not most, of them have ingrown or stubble or dark areas on their genital area where they wax; it doesn't seem to bother the men AT ALL. If a guy gets close to a vagina, he loves it automatically. If it bothers you, then let your hair grow in a bit. There is nothing wrong at all with having pubic hair - if there was, we wouldn't have it. You can also try something called Tend Skin - it is the best thing ever for ingrowns. Really, really, truly.
EnigmaticClarity Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Many, if not most, of them have ingrown or stubble or dark areas on their genital area where they wax; it doesn't seem to bother the men AT ALL. If a guy gets close to a vagina, he loves it automatically. Yea, that's true. My girlfriend shaves and I didn't realize it until just now by checking some swimsuit photos that she does have those little shaving pimples around the hair along her bikini line. Not a big deal at all, I've looked right at it for months and didn't notice it until today.
zengirl Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I Nair, and I don't really get those. (I do get it along the bikini line if I clean up with a razor, occasionally, in between Nair sessions. But the Bikini Zone cream works for me with the bumps.) So, that's an option. Doesn't last as long as waxing, but way cheaper/less painful. I used to get regular waxes, but one day I just realized I hated it and it wasn't worth it. So, I stopped. I shaved for awhile until I discovered Nair. I've trimmed, as well. I don't like the look/feel so I don't, but the BF I had at the time had no problem with very short, well trimmed, conditioned (yes, condition that stuff!) hair down there. I don't think men are that picky (in most cases), unless you're growing a forest or something.
dasein Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I like some hair on the cooter, not a pumpkin patch, but more than a landing strip.
carhill Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 TBH, all of the women I've been with have been 'natural' so it's never really come up. Perhaps my experiences have been outlier.
Feelin Frisky Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I wish women would stop assuming that a man expects some kind of perfection there. I for one don't even like it shaved or waxed (and especially with no pattern designs like an air stip there which rings totally unnatural)--it smacks of a vanity that is a turn off as if she is preparing herself not just for her lover but for porn star stardom, or conformity or just because that's what she seems to think looks good. A pussy however is not for public consumption and the person who will be showing it loving attention is the only one who will really see it because the wearer can't really unless she keeps using a mirror. Thankfully women DO tend to themselves and keep it tidy just as shaving their arm pits or legs is the norm. That makes the absolute best picture for me--a woman simply looking like nature made her with an added modecum of her own care to make it pleasant for her mate. Anything more is overkill.
Emilia Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I wish women would stop assuming that a man expects some kind of perfection there. I for one don't even like it shaved or waxed (and especially with no pattern designs like an air stip there which rings totally unnatural)--it smacks of a vanity that is a turn off as if she is preparing herself not just for her lover but for porn star stardom, or conformity or just because that's what she seems to think looks good. A pussy however is not for public consumption and the person who will be showing it loving attention is the only one who will really see it because the wearer can't really unless she keeps using a mirror. Thankfully women DO tend to themselves and keep it tidy just as shaving their arm pits or legs is the norm. That makes the absolute best picture for me--a woman simply looking like nature made her with an added modecum of her own care to make it pleasant for her mate. Anything more is overkill. Men think it's all for them but it isn't, hate to burst your bubble. While most guys I know appreciate a landing strip and the effort, it is also about keeping hair to the minimum during menstruation thus managing the smell and general 'cleanliness' easier
zengirl Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Men think it's all for them but it isn't, hate to burst your bubble. While most guys I know appreciate a landing strip and the effort, it is also about keeping hair to the minimum during menstruation thus managing the smell and general 'cleanliness' easier True dat. Heck, in the summer time, it's just nice to feel a little breezy there, honestly.
make me believe Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Most guys are reasonable about it. If a guy wants "perfection" he can stick to his porn.
depplover_1980 Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Men think it's all for them but it isn't, hate to burst your bubble. While most guys I know appreciate a landing strip and the effort, it is also about keeping hair to the minimum during menstruation thus managing the smell and general 'cleanliness' easier Not sure why you put your feminist underpanties on for the kindest male representation you'll find on these boards. Wait til the 'it should be shaved' crew begin, you'll explode!
Author FrustratedStandards Posted September 1, 2011 Author Posted September 1, 2011 I wish women would stop assuming that a man expects some kind of perfection there. I for one don't even like it shaved or waxed (and especially with no pattern designs like an air stip there which rings totally unnatural)--it smacks of a vanity that is a turn off as if she is preparing herself not just for her lover but for porn star stardom, or conformity or just because that's what she seems to think looks good. A pussy however is not for public consumption and the person who will be showing it loving attention is the only one who will really see it because the wearer can't really unless she keeps using a mirror. Thankfully women DO tend to themselves and keep it tidy just as shaving their arm pits or legs is the norm. That makes the absolute best picture for me--a woman simply looking like nature made her with an added modecum of her own care to make it pleasant for her mate. Anything more is overkill. That's the best answer i've read so far. I guess its true, anything too "overkill" isn't natural. That makes sense.
TudorII Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 Ah the age old question of to shave, trim or afro out the bush. You are going to get a multitude of answers and logic on this one and the funny thing is the only two answers that matter are your own and the lucky one getting to partake in the honey hole. What do you prefer, what feels good to you both just looking in the mirror but also during sex, foreplay, etc? Ask your parnter the same question. I have gone through phases where a I liked them trimed but not bald and then bald all the way. But I've never really cared for the all natural mega bush with the exception of red heads because that fire crotch and red hair down under is a turn on in that case. To each their own. For me, I like going down on a smooth mound and slit and not having to hold hair out of the way or stopping to pull a rogue hair off my tongue. I like that during sex when you are fully penatrated and grinding that it is smooth and glides across my own skin. Its never about what it looked it, razor bumps, in grown hairs, etc...its more of what it feels like and makes for more of an enjoyable snack IMO. But most important is that the woman feels sexy in her choice. If she is all worried about it looking funny or weird it robs the moment of being what it could. So do what works for you and if you partner's preference is different than your own, trust me they care more about getting to be there with it then how it is packaged.
FitChick Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 (edited) It's a generational thing. Young guys today are used to watching more porn than their elders and porn stars today are hairless. Middle-aged men generally prefer pubic hair on women because when they first became sexually active, that's what all the women looked like and they were aroused by the sight. One man told me he found shaved or waxed pubes repugnant because it made him feel like a pedophile. I like a man neatly trimmed. I've never dated a man who waxed but I might like it for the novelty occasionally. Edited September 1, 2011 by FitChick
LexiB Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I have seen pictures of naked women that they post themselves (or their men post them) on an internet site. Many, if not most, of them have ingrown or stubble or dark areas on their genital area where they wax; it doesn't seem to bother the men AT ALL. If a guy gets close to a vagina, he loves it automatically. If it bothers you, then let your hair grow in a bit. There is nothing wrong at all with having pubic hair - if there was, we wouldn't have it. You can also try something called Tend Skin - it is the best thing ever for ingrowns. Really, really, truly. Thanks for the tip -just got back in from Sephora! Hope this stuff works.
ThsAmericanLife Posted September 1, 2011 Posted September 1, 2011 I prefer men who prefer 'natural'... trimming ok... a little shaving around the sides for bikini weather... I also don't like it when men's parts are totally overgrown with hair, so that is understandable. But I never have and never will wax. No man I've ever been with even suggested it. If a guy did ask me though, I'd tell him he can join me at the parlor to have his hair ripped out at the roots around his sensitive parts and see how he likes it.
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