Any turn off can be fixed with confidence. True or false?

[OnyxSnowfall]

Huh? I'm highly attracted to Jon Stewart, and I'm a completely heterosexual male. You don't have to know someone to be attracted to them...ideally, it begins before you ever talk to them. Approaches start when one person is attracted to another.

 

also (I was going to edit my other post, but was unable due to another person's reply):

 

are you then saying that if you came upon Jon Stewart, in a crowd, among others... never having known about him and his "success/talents/whatever" prior... you'd be drawn to him?

 

There is a difference between getting to know how someone is portrayed and gawking at them while they perform --- "enjoying their works" (still not their being/true and or full self) --- and being drawn to a stranger out of a purely physical attraction. Sometimes "attraction" develops, and physique becomes enhanced (especially when in love...) but that doesn't change the fact that there are "typical" things that get overlooked (and if there is a chance to demonstrate qualities/traits... that those will be unappreciated). Sometimes people are just put off by physical aspects of others. And unless they can really really compensate for them in other ways... ...

 

it is what it is.

Edited September 2, 2011 by OnyxSnowfall

[somedude81]

Amazing, I read the first two pages of this thread and I'm already pissed off.

 

Ladies, know why short guys have "Napoleon complexes?"

 

Because you f**king give them to us!!!

[EnigmaticClarity]

are you then saying that if you came upon Jon Stewart, in a crowd, among others... never having known about him and his "success/talents/whatever" prior... you'd be drawn to him?

 

If while in that crowd he had occasion to display some of that wit and confidence of his, yes, I'd get as wet as dewy morning grass at the sound of his voice.

[Queen Zenobia]

Amazing, I read the first two pages of this thread and I'm already pissed off.

 

Ladies, know why short guys have "Napoleon complexes?"

 

Because you f**king give them to us!!!

 

Don't pay the haters no mind. People are prone to talk big game in "laboratory" settings, but in real life people act quite differently.

 

Case in point, I always found white men to be highly unattractive. I'm marrying one

[EnigmaticClarity]

Ladies, know why short guys have "Napoleon complexes?"

 

Because you f**king give them to us!!!

 

Own your own shortcomings, or accept blame for women with anorexia, bulimia, boob jobs, and facelifts. Realize the societal double-standard of women being forced to wear makeup and shave and pluck hair from all over their bodies and count yourself as lucky to be a man.

[OnyxSnowfall]

If while in that crowd he had occasion to display some of that wit and confidence of his, yes, I'd get as wet as dewy morning grass at the sound of his voice.

 

Lol. No, he doesn't sing/speak to you, nor near you. You just "see" him. But being a guy and getting "wet" doesn't make much sense... you mean hard? Still, something's with your sexuality thereee Or it is just a "platonic" attraction. And I don't think the issue is that women cannot be attracted to short men in platonic ways --- that's silly. Of course they are and can be.

 

Enjoying someone's voice/character is very different than wanting to bang the vessel it comes out of. If you have a voice fetish, it is understandable that you would incur confusion.

 

I have met intelligent and nice etc etc men whom I deem to be short, but I see them as "good" people... not as sexual prospects. Amazing talents can inspire me and entice my own creativity, but that's as far as it goes =/... it's nothing very deep.

[EnigmaticClarity]

But being a guy and getting "wet" doesn't make much sense... you mean hard? Still, something's with your sexuality thereee Or it is just a "platonic" attraction. And I don't think the issue is that women cannot be attracted to short men in platonic ways --- that's silly. Of course they are and can be.

 

I'm completely in touch with my feminine side, so that's what gets wet for Jon Stewart.

 

I'd bet no less than a grand that if Jon Stewart put out a national call for women who are 5' 9" or better to date him at 5' 7", he'd get at least half a million responses.

[AD1980]

Brown losing who? This is coming from the person who just said many women are entitled princesses and ugly on the inside. But ill leave that alone I guess.

 

I advise you try and change your thought process, because the current one seems to very well not be working.

 

brown losing? what does that mean? do you mean brown nosing? I never said that to you another poster did.

 

My only point was i responded harshly to a mena spirited and ugly comment why am i the bad guy?

Edited September 2, 2011 by AD1980

[Disenchantedly Yours]

OnyxSnowfall

5'8" is much different from 5'7".

Also, you mentioned "growing up" in your earlier reply... that would explain something, too. A grown woman is far less likely to be interested in a "shorter" man than a "girl" is. So unless these friends of yours were women who were complimenting your brother...

 

An inch of height is a big difference? Since when?

 

My brother lives in a different state than me now. More of my friends knew him while we were growing up through college. Those same friends still think he is hot. He also has met a few of my "grown up" newer friends since college and they also commented on his hottness factor - despite his height. He's dated girls who were a bit taller then him sometimes too. One girl he dated was sitting on a park bench one day when someone asked her if she wanted to model for Ralph Lauren. She declined.

 

Shorter men just seem "boyish"...

 

Perhaps to you and some women, just as boobs and age matter to some guys. But height never correlated to maturity or manishness for me. Just as age doesn't always coorelate to maturity in men or manishness either. If there is one thing I've learned in life is that age does not always begate maturity. And height certainly doesn't necessarily begate masculinity. Perhaps that has something to do with my 5'7 father who was a great example of manhood and who married my mother - 16 years his junior. Although I will say that sometimes shorter men let their height dictate their attitude. And that's the real shame in the situation. The attitude, not the height.

 

It's normal for "girls" to like "boys". But for "women" to like "boys"... probably something a little screwy in their head. Just saying.

 

I'm sorry. I must have missed the conversation about pedophiles. I'm not sure how this came into play. Your talking to someone that is small chested and the size of my chest never made me feel like a "girl" for it. I'm all woman. Infact, I am amused by the idea that a man would have to be screwy in the head to like me because of my smaller chest. Just as you are insinuating that that if a woman likes a smaller man then she likes boys. A family friend of mine has a son that is only 13 and he is already 6 feet tall..are we now going to say he is a man because of his nearly full grown male body?

 

And unless you've met Jon Stewart and have been around him to know if you're truly attracted to him or his "accomplishments" etc, that's a silly comparison. He is still essentially a stranger. I don't know who Seth Green is so... leaving that one alone.

 

You're the only person I ever heard say using celebrity examples was "silly". Nonsense. It's the only group of people we all commonly know. Yes, all actors and actresses are strangers. And if we had the oppurtunity to really get to know them, a lot of our orginal celebrity crushes might go out the door. However, people still can have celebrity crushes based on a combination of looks and how they perceive that person to be. Really no different then how we perceive our potential mates in the beginning of a relationship.

 

I actually think Jon Stewart is a very attractive man even without knowing his personality and complishments. I have a thing for Jewish (and Irish) men. But Jon Stewart is actually a very good looking man.

 

Seth Green is not that famous of an actor, but he's sexy to me.

 

Further, what's interesting to me is that you only had a problem with my examples of attraction for the shorter men. You didn't make any mention of my attraction to Andy Pettite.

 

 

nevertheless, SUCCESSFUL short men are far different than a random short male stranger who shares basic anonymity etc with, millions.

 

Successful plain or average girls are also far different from random average or plain female non-famous strangers.

 

No one picks a mate purely based on one feature alone. It's a combination of features AND personality that draws us to someone.

 

also (I was going to edit my other post, but was unable due to another person's reply):

 

are you then saying that if you came upon Jon Stewart, in a crowd, among others... never having known about him and his "success/talents/whatever" prior... you'd be drawn to him?

 

Totally. Yes.

 

There is a difference between getting to know how someone is portrayed and gawking at them while they perform --- "enjoying their works" (still not their being/true and or full self) --- and being drawn to a stranger out of a purely physical attraction. Sometimes "attraction" develops, and physique becomes enhanced (especially when in love...) but that doesn't change the fact that there are "typical" things that get overlooked (and if there is a chance to demonstrate qualities/traits... that those will be unappreciated). Sometimes people are just put off by physical aspects of others. And unless they can really really compensate for them in other ways... ...

 

it is what it is.

 

By your argument, no one can be attracted to anyone in the spotlight because we don't really know who they are. And by your argument, we can only be attracted to those around us on a purely physical level for it to be "pure" to an attraction to them..and all other things are mearly compensations for "defects" perceived. That's what I get from your comments.

 

Yes, people are put off by certain physical aspects. Some women will always chase tall men. Some men will always chase young women. But thank-god that I don't let my worth be tied up in such things and that I don't let a man's worth be tied up in such things when I look for a boyfriend. That's all I really can say to that.

Edited September 2, 2011 by Disenchantedly Yours

[rafallus]

It's normal for "girls" to like "boys". But for "women" to like "boys"... probably something a little screwy in their head. Just saying.

 

Shorter men just seem "boyish"...

 

Let me get this straight:

 

Given that you associate being short with "boyishness", you indirectly say that women liking short men are screwed in the head?

 

W to the O to the W...

[aj22one]

Let me get this straight:

 

Given that you associate being short with "boyishness", you indirectly say that women liking short men are screwed in the head?

 

W to the O to the W...

 

A cynical person would say "why yes of course because all women are screwed in the head". But perhaps that another discussion for another day.

[Stung]

If while in that crowd he had occasion to display some of that wit and confidence of his, yes, I'd get as wet as dewy morning grass at the sound of his voice.

 

You and me both, friend. Mrrowr.

 

Don't pay the haters no mind. People are prone to talk big game in "laboratory" settings, but in real life people act quite differently.

 

Case in point, I always found white men to be highly unattractive. I'm marrying one

 

Own your own shortcomings, or accept blame for women with anorexia, bulimia, boob jobs, and facelifts.

 

Both interesting and oft-overlooked points.

 

Zenobia, btw, I am married to a blue-eyed extra-pale white man after many years of trending towards a well-established preference for black-eyed brown hued Asians/Native Americans/Latinos/Persians. Whatyagonnado, there was just something about his big shiny brain.

[Quiet Storm]

I don't understand short women who insist on guys at least 6 foot. Leave the tall guys for the tall girls! I'm 5'9" and 6' is perfect. I don't like guys over 6'2" (too tall), so I don't understand why some women want a guy 10 inches taller than they are, or why a guy would want a girl this much shorter.

 

I think a lot of us just think, the bigger the better?

 

I am only 5'2" 120lbs, so petite (but curvy). My husband is over a foot taller and 100 lbs heavier.

 

Despite my height, I have always been attracted to tall, broad-shouldered men.

 

I don't think it has anything to do with penis size.

 

I think it is because I like to feel safe and protected.

 

As for why a man would want a short, petite chick... I think he likes the feeling of being the manly protector. Also, I've been told that we are curvy in all the right places. Plus, in the bedroom, they can carry you around and pick you up.

 

I think it is one of those attractions left over from cave man days...like men and their hip to waist ratio attraction.

 

In the beginning of mankind, it benefited a woman to have the biggest and strongest mate, as she needed protection for her home and offspring.

[somedude81]

Own your own shortcomings, or accept blame for women with anorexia, bulimia, boob jobs, and facelifts. Realize the societal double-standard of women being forced to wear makeup and shave and pluck hair from all over their bodies and count yourself as lucky to be a man.

What the hell does that have to do with women disliking me just because I'm short?

[OnyxSnowfall]

Let me get this straight:

 

Given that you associate being short with "boyishness", you indirectly say that women liking short men are screwed in the head?

 

W to the O to the W...

 

Let me straighten it out for you =)

 

it can be associated with being boyish. If a woman does like boys, there is "probably" something screwy in her head, yes.

 

I have seen short, hairy, bald, beastly men. They do not look like boys. I have seen short, less hairy and more feminine men and, they do seem like boys. There are differences among them surely. But for those that go for the ones that certainly portray boyishness... I wouldn't be surprised if they had issues lol.

 

Besides, the probability is good. As aj22one pointed out.

[AD1980]

Let me straighten it out for you =)

 

it can be associated with being boyish. If a woman does like boys, there is "probably" something screwy in her head, yes.

 

I have seen short, hairy, bald, beastly men. They do not look like boys. I have seen short, less hairy and more feminine men and, they do seem like boys. There are differences among them surely. But for those that go for the ones that certainly portray boyishness... I wouldn't be surprised if they had issues lol.

 

Besides, the probability is good. As aj22one pointed out.

 

You really overanalyze the **** out of things christ..

 

Do tall hairless feminine men you of boys also or does height automatically make one masculne in your weird world?

[OnyxSnowfall]

An inch of height is a big difference? Since when?

since it made a difference to me =/

 

Perhaps to you and some women, just as boobs and age matter to some guys. But height never correlated to maturity or manishness for me. Just as age doesn't always coorelate to maturity in men or manishness either.

 

That is fine. I've never claimed that all women or even "most" have an issue with height in males. I stated I did and do. I can overlook every other physical aspect... seriously. Weight, skin, hair (or lack there of), etc etc etc... I just CANNOT get aroused, sexually aroused, when a man is too short. Just like I can't get aroused at the idea of being naughty with a cat or a camel or even my own gender etc etc.

 

And I hate repeating myself here. We are talking about physical attraction. I already stated I met short men whom were wonderful people. I AM NOT SAYING THAT their physique equates into them being inferior as a human being at all. I am just saying I can't get sexually excited over them, even if they are great people.

 

You're the only person I ever heard say using celebrity examples was "silly". Nonsense.

And I'm probably one of the only ones you'll ever hear tell you that I'm not into celebrities nor even much into modern entertainment. I don't believe that because a majority of people are into something that the opposite is inherently wrong either.

 

You didn't make any mention of my attraction to Andy Pettite.

I am unaware of whom Andy Pettite is too, sorry. I suppose I am more intent on leading my own life rather than intangibly immersing myself into others. I do know of several kinds of artists and scientists, but more so their work than their personal lives (unless it involves and signifies a development).

 

It is fine if people have "attractions" to people they'll ever meet. I guess it's just not real enough for me. I like real, I like truth.

 

As I've mentioned before, I'm also not proud of not being sexually attracted to short men. If I'm single, it doesn't benefit me in anyway to not be.

[OnyxSnowfall]

You really overanalyze the **** out of things christ..

 

Do tall hairless feminine men you of boys also or does height automatically make one masculne in your weird world?

 

I like hairier men. Yes... if they are taller and mostly hairless, it would be at least initially off-putting for me. But if they were otherwise what I was seeking (or close enough), I'd certainly be able to overlook it. But too short of height? Just... can't. I never stated the "boyish" association as the sole reason it's unattractive or even primary one. I was correlating it with a story about "growing up".

 

It is one association of many. And it isn't applied to every short man either. Lol.

[AmEricanWomann]

I like hairier men. Yes... if they are taller and mostly hairless, it would be at least initially off-putting for me. But if they were otherwise what I was seeking (or close enough), I'd certainly be able to overlook it. But too short of height? Just... can't. I never stated the "boyish" association as the sole reason it's unattractive or even primary one. I was correlating it with a story about "growing up".

 

It is one association of many. And it isn't applied to every short man either. Lol.

 

I love a hairy man. Well hairy chest, stomach and forarms. No hairy back, butt or shoulders.

Its so annoying to have a man who's aces in other areas. Tall, broad shouldered, big, beefy, and he shaves his chest...No, no no! Bad bad Bad!!

[Queen Zenobia]

 

Zenobia, btw, I am married to a blue-eyed extra-pale white man after many years of trending towards a well-established preference for black-eyed brown hued Asians/Native Americans/Latinos/Persians. Whatyagonnado, there was just something about his big shiny brain.

 

Basically my story verbatim.

[OnyxSnowfall]

I love a hairy man. Well hairy chest, stomach and forarms. No hairy back, butt or shoulders.

Its so annoying to have a man who's aces in other areas. Tall, broad shouldered, big, beefy, and he shaves his chest...No, no no! Bad bad Bad!!

 

Mmm yes, a hairy chest and the happy trail on the stomach :love:

 

shaving chest = as does shaving their legs to me. It's just...

...

!

[Wolf18]

This is really annoying.

 

You don't need to **** men who aren't tall, but what is so frustrating and breeds the anti-woman mentality of many guys is that not only do we never get credit where its due, but women also go out of their way to put us down and de-masculinize us.

 

If you're going to say short men (presuming all men under 5'10, according to the american womans definition) are feminine, you better have some concrete evidence. Because I don't think Sylvestre Stallone is feminine. Or Al Pacino. Or actually, come to think of it, 99% of all men who ever lived before the mid 20th century. The Vikings, contrary to popular belief, were on average 5'6 or 5'7, were they feminine and boyish? I'm sure if we brought the "short, feminine" and unable to protect you vikings back through time and pit them against your favorite 6'3 "beefy" hunks, the vikings would crush them. The Conquistadores were on average 5'2, yet a few hundred of them (whether they were good or bad) wrestled the Americas from millions of indians! But hey they wouldn't be able to protect you from...what is it you need protection from again?

 

Don't date us. Don't sleep with us. Tolerate all kinds of negative traits in tall guys and ignore all kinds of positive traits in guys who are an inch under 5'8 (or whatever "cutoff" you have) if that makes you happy, we're for the most part used to it and are reminded how little value we have in the eyes of women on a daily basis. But why do you constantly have to bash us, question our masculinity, act like we're so vulnerable and incapable of protecting you, and then when some of the short tempered stocky shorter guys go out and beat down your invincible 6'2 uberman before your eyes to prove how wrong you are, call it Napoleon complex?

Edited September 2, 2011 by Wolf18

[carhill]

Sometimes the winning move is not to play.

[AHardDaysNight]

Sometimes the winning move is not to play.

 

Bingo. Sometimes playing the game only makes you get burnt.

[somedude81]

Uh, so basically give up on on dating?

 

That doesn't sound like the best advice...