njruns75 Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 here's the situation... Guy chased me down at first. Text text text... wasn't that interested in him. He's 29. I'm 36. I thought he was chubby and wasn't sure about it. Gave it a shot. He seems sweet but I have more to offer than he does. He still lives with mom and dad for now (had an apartment befrore, though) and will be moving soon. Told me he had no money and never follows through with dates. I paid for some of our drinks (I paid more than he did!) when we went out a few times. He doesn't seem to be a big texter with words and will only say "hey" or "what's up?" etc... I havn't gotten to know him yet. Last week we were supposed to go out and he didn't follow though. Said he only had a little time bc of work and wanted to come hang out but didn't want me to think badly if he left right away. He talked very sexual with me via text the night before and we pretty much mutually decided we would get together. I told him I didn't want to be perceived as easy and I liked him. Asked if he wanted to get to know me and he said he's physical, but only spends time with women he actually wants to get to know etc. He came over. we had sex ( i know i know.. people will say that is a definite no way for a relationship. but i wanted it also) and then he asked me to go out on a date this week.... Since we had sex, less and less contact from him. Only will contact me once in a while with smart ass/negative facebook comments (see my post below on thread). I'm thinking I was bad in bed, or something, but I would highly doubt it, as I have always been told I'm good;) !!!!All these thoughts are going through my head as to what I did in bed with him that may have turned him off etc. I haven't contacted him. So far again, he has set no date to go out (and we were sup to go out THIS week!) He said he had to wait until Tues was over to figure out his work schedule. Am I wasting time with this guy? Did I get used for sex? Or is it that now that he knows he "got " me he doesnt have to try so hard but still likes me?
KathyM Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 here's the situation... Guy chased me down at first. Text text text... wasn't that interested in him. He's 29. I'm 36. I thought he was chubby and wasn't sure about it. Gave it a shot. He seems sweet but I have more to offer than he does. He still lives with mom and dad for now (had an apartment befrore, though) and will be moving soon. Told me he had no money and never follows through with dates. I paid for some of our drinks (I paid more than he did!) when we went out a few times. He doesn't seem to be a big texter with words and will only say "hey" or "what's up?" etc... I havn't gotten to know him yet. Last week we were supposed to go out and he didn't follow though. Said he only had a little time bc of work and wanted to come hang out but didn't want me to think badly if he left right away. He talked very sexual with me via text the night before and we pretty much mutually decided we would get together. I told him I didn't want to be perceived as easy and I liked him. Asked if he wanted to get to know me and he said he's physical, but only spends time with women he actually wants to get to know etc. He came over. we had sex ( i know i know.. people will say that is a definite no way for a relationship. but i wanted it also) and then he asked me to go out on a date this week.... Since we had sex, less and less contact from him. Only will contact me once in a while with smart ass/negative facebook comments (see my post below on thread). I'm thinking I was bad in bed, or something, but I would highly doubt it, as I have always been told I'm good;) !!!!All these thoughts are going through my head as to what I did in bed with him that may have turned him off etc. I haven't contacted him. So far again, he has set no date to go out (and we were sup to go out THIS week!) He said he had to wait until Tues was over to figure out his work schedule. Am I wasting time with this guy? Did I get used for sex? Or is it that now that he knows he "got " me he doesnt have to try so hard but still likes me? You got used. For some men, once they get the girl (have sex with her), they move on to the next conquest. Or for some, they lose respect for a girl if she's too easy, and they realize she's not a keeper for the long term. Sounds like he's keeping his distance now. You should have waited.
FrustratedStandards Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I agree with the above. He just found you sexually interesting and nothing more. There is no point in even thinking about this guy. You didn't turn him off, he just "won the prize" and he's satisfied with that.
Llakdknek Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 It also sounds like you weren't even interested in him to start. You got used. Please try and learn from it at least and go with your gut the next time.
Shaun-Dro Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 here's the situation... Guy chased me down at first. Text text text... wasn't that interested in him. He's 29. I'm 36. I thought he was chubby and wasn't sure about it. Gave it a shot. He seems sweet but I have more to offer than he does. He still lives with mom and dad for now (had an apartment befrore, though) and will be moving soon. Told me he had no money and never follows through with dates. I paid for some of our drinks (I paid more than he did!) when we went out a few times. He doesn't seem to be a big texter with words and will only say "hey" or "what's up?" etc... I havn't gotten to know him yet. Last week we were supposed to go out and he didn't follow though. Said he only had a little time bc of work and wanted to come hang out but didn't want me to think badly if he left right away. He talked very sexual with me via text the night before and we pretty much mutually decided we would get together. I told him I didn't want to be perceived as easy and I liked him. Asked if he wanted to get to know me and he said he's physical, but only spends time with women he actually wants to get to know etc. He came over. we had sex ( i know i know.. people will say that is a definite no way for a relationship. but i wanted it also) and then he asked me to go out on a date this week.... Since we had sex, less and less contact from him. Only will contact me once in a while with smart ass/negative facebook comments (see my post below on thread). I'm thinking I was bad in bed, or something, but I would highly doubt it, as I have always been told I'm good;) !!!!All these thoughts are going through my head as to what I did in bed with him that may have turned him off etc. I haven't contacted him. So far again, he has set no date to go out (and we were sup to go out THIS week!) He said he had to wait until Tues was over to figure out his work schedule. Am I wasting time with this guy? Did I get used for sex? Or is it that now that he knows he "got " me he doesnt have to try so hard but still likes me? You giving up the nookie after such a short outing with this man messed it up for you guys, no doubt. A guy like me doesn't even try getting a girl in bed unless we're exclusive. That's just how I am because it just doesn't feel right to sleep with a woman after only knowing her a short time. Her value's decreased in my opinion.
sm1tten Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Am I wasting time with this guy? Yes. Did I get used for sex? No. You wanted sex, you got sex. Or is it that now that he knows he "got " me he doesnt have to try so hard but still likes me? Your answer is in your own post: said he's physical, but only spends time with women he actually wants to get to know
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