LoveSickGuy911 Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 You always hear about people drowning their sorrows away in alcohol. Well I'm trying to do this and it's not stopping me from thinking about my ex. What am I doing wrong? Am I suppose to drink until I black out every night?
Nohbody Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 The Charles Bukowski method is not recommended by most members here on LS. Alcohol is actually a depressant, so drinking it makes you... that's right! Depressed. Unfortunately, this is not something you can escape from. Just gotta take the pain. Feel it. It hurts. Good. Use it. Find a use for it.
sun_moon Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Well Nohbody beat me to the punch. Thats right its a downer and will actually make you feel worse. Rent a funny stupid unromantic movie, you need it.
betterdeal Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 The drinking to forget people I've known did black out regularly, so yes, you would need to black out every night to be up there with them. It's not a very effective way to process trauma - it can take years, decades without any real progress. The side-effects are pretty well-known - liver damage being one of the most significant physical ones. I do not recommend it. That said, once in a blue moon, say once when you split up, is understandable. The best aids for recovery from psychological and emotional trauma have been anti-anxiety, sleeping and anti-depressant medication, touch and talk therapy, good diet and exercise in my experience. Go see your doctor about the medication; book yourself a massage with a massage therapist or a wet shave and haircut with a barber for the touch therapy; join a martial arts or yoga class for the exercise; eat more vegetables and add a multivitamin to your diet; and read a copy of "Getting Past Your Breakup" by Susan Elliot.
PelicanPete Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Alcohol is used to forget. Trying to forget about your ex isn't dealing with why you are trying to forget about your ex. Therefore, what exactly does alcohol solve? What does any sort of sedation solve when trying to deal with an emotional problem? All it does is mask the real problem, and before you know it you can become reliant on a substance rather then yourself. Pain of any kind is a little self reminder that you're doing something wrong. Your mind is trying to urge you through overcoming this challenge, so don't block it out. Listen to your body, let it tell you what's wrong, and deal with it.
Duckduckgoose Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Alcohol is a depressant. Yeah you will forget things for a little while... like while you're under the influence, but it will only be waiting for you while you're sober. Nothing is going to fix your sorrows for you but time and mentally working it out yourself. I drank a lot in college when two boyfriends left me. You know what? It took me longer to get over those relationships because I WAS drinking so much and I was broke on top of that cause even hard liquor is expensive. Your money and time are better spent on improving yourself, not dragging yourself down with a substance. Nevermind you could develop a drinking habit which will seriously **** the rest of your life up and most likely kill you and probably some other people if you decide you want to drive like that.
antinko Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 (edited) A broken heart will have a much higher chance of healing than a broken liver and, trust me, a broken liver will hurt a lot more. I don't wish to sound rude, but you're an idiot if you're using alcohol as medicine. Seriously, you're just going to destroy your health if you drink at such a high intensity every day and yes, it's a depressant. I've seen the depths of despair alcohol abuse can send a person into and it's not pretty at all. I lost a close friend because he was an alcoholic and his death left a broken hearted fiance, young child, devastated family and friends to live with the grief. If you try and fix your problem with alcohol, you a. won't succeed and b. will quite possibly hurt other people around you. Don't be so selfish. I wouldn't say the above if I didn't care. Edited August 31, 2011 by antinko
betterdeal Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I'd advise you to get a professional to help you with any medication. You're using booze as a medication.
ScienceGal Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 In my opinion alcohol makes it worse. It depresses me and prevents me from thinking clearly. As in... when I am sober I realize the downfalls of the relationship and can accept more that it is over. When I drink a few just to have a good time, I am ok. When I drink a lot and any thought of the ex comes up, I am a sobbing mess and completely consumed by my emotions. All I do is miss him and want him. I am suddenly a hopeless romantic again and throw all logic out the window. I am thankful that I am not a drunk dialer! Point is, like others have said, you need to go through the pain to get to the other side. There are no short cuts. Repressing your feelings with large amounts of alcohol is only a temporary badaid (if it works at all).
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