could this lead to reconciliation ?

[micot]

hi

Some back ground for you .Was friends with my now ex and a co-worker for about a yr and a half.we datted steadily for 4 yrs. good relationship no arguments,curssing etc.One night she basically just left my place and went home [no goodbye,see you later etc] ,left jewelery i've given her over the years on my dresser [for me to find later ]Days later cotacted her see what was going on ,i got the ''it's not me'' , ''i love you but not in love with you anymore'' speeches.had very low contact ,then went full no contact.She left me back in June .

K her dad is verry ill - recently i heard he was back in the hospital i broke n.c. called to ask how her dad was .We started talking [general things ]

i asked why she left ? i got cause she was frustrated [not with me] she has a-lot going on [work,her kids,her dad,she just got a house etc] and if i wanted to do something together she'd be tired or just not want to do it and said no so we ended up not doing the things,AND now with school starting and the kids in sports she knew we'd still be in the same position .Told her i understood and dealt with it before .

Latly we've been having good conversations nightly they last an hour or so at times.She says we're ''FRIENDS'' , i say i don't feel that, cause i'll ask her to hang out i'll get a no i don't want to , or i don't want to make any commitments .

Ran into her yesterday at the store we said hi talked general stuff ,I asked if she'd be home later and if she';d like to talk by phone ? she said sure.we talked i know and she admits she's confused , and has a-lot going on now - we are re-building our ''friendship'' by talking openly and honestly with each other [according to her]I have feelings for her [she knows] she says she does have feelings for me just not the same BUT cares about me deeply,doesn't wish me harm,misses me in a different way .

I ask so this leaves us just as friends ? she says you have to be friends before anything else,i agree .I say we were great friends before .

IF we keep going good talking like we have been no bitterness,no argueing,curssing etc BEING that feelings are still their for each other [[more so on my side i'd say] could this turn into a reconsiliation ?

I think if we go slow like seeing each other time to tiime continue talking

the chances are good . i've invited her over to hang out see the dog [she loves him ]then we talk she tells me what ''friendship'' means to her , i say what it means to me .THEN start maybe going to eat , a movie etc

and see where it leads us naturally ,no pressure.

SHE does say when i ask when we can sit down face to face and talk she feels as though i'm pressuring her because i ask what day / time.I ask so i know to be around at home .I'D liketo do it quicker rather than later [it's already been going on 3 months apart]I know you can't rush these things.

BUT i feel the longer apart the harder it will be to get back together

PLUS i don't want her to start something with someone else , or me to that wouldn't be fair to do .

I have said to her look people break-up seperate for a while it happens BUT they can reconsile and come back even stronger IF both are willing .she agrees , just doesn't know if she's really willing to yet .

OH she's even mentioned maybe she's not good enough for me [i thought that was lame] AND i said how about if i choose what's good for me or not

[TroyNJ]

I hate to tell you this but odds are she is seeing someone else...When you get the "I love you but not in love with you", it's almost a guarantee.

[Orianne]

I hate to tell you this but odds are she is seeing someone else...When you get the "I love you but not in love with you", it's almost a guarantee.

 

So true...