We had a row and he walked out 10 years together

[amandap]

This is where i am at right now, i was with my ex 10 yrs and engaged for 9 of them, we had our ups and downs like most do, but we both loved each other very much, i will keep this short, his son aged 20 came back into his life after NC for 12 yrs, his son had many problems but no matter how bad his son behaved in our house he wouldnt give him rules to follow which in turn caused friction between us, long story short , we broke up just before christmas and he moved out with his son, but after 2 weeks got back together, his son stayed in his own flat, so everything was going really well, i would tell my now ex to go and spend as much time as he needed to reconnect with his son, then at the end of june we had a silly agrument and he left saying he wouldnt come back, i was desperate for contact so txted him about 4 times over a 2 week period only for him to ingnore me, i then left it 2 weeks with NC and finally rang him with an excuse, well he still said he wont ever come back but that he still loves me , i made the mistake of pleading ,he said he didnt want to see me in the near future either , so with my heart broken i then txted and said i will never mention us getting back together again, he does know i love him, he has now started ringing me once a week asking what im up to and telling me of his week, anyway the next time he rang i told him that I didnt want him back and that i was moving on, though it took all i had to say it, he responded with oh i didnt think it would take you long to get over me, with that i said take care , before i could put the phone down he shouted i will ring you next week, well we have been talking once a week for the last 4 weeks, and the last time he phoned he said when he gets paid he wants to buy me something small i told him not to , though he is insisting, saying he will bring it over to me, so now he does want to see me, maybe its since i told him i dont want him back, who knows, all i know is i love him to bits, but feel like i took a little of his power anyway from him when i said i dont want you back, you see i have taken that choice away from him, its not up to him anymore, we even txted each other last night for the first time in 2 months, just making each other laugh, i dont know what the future holds but as they say i am getting stronger each day, but i am still heart broken, do you think im doing this right,