kamaye Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I've been seeing this guy for about 6 weeks now. For the first month everything was great but over the last 2 weeks he's been acting very distant. At first I thought it was my fault, b/c after I slept over his house for the 1st time (we did NOT have sex) my mom took me on a whole guilt trip and then I felt bad so I started acting distant. But I got over it in a couple days and then things seemed back to be normal between us. A couple days later I noticed that he started breaking dates & not calling me as much. But he said he was having a bad week so I left him alone to deal w/ his problems. Then he texted me saying that he felt better so I asked what was wrong and he never replied. I moved to New York a few days ago for grad school (he's in Connecticut) and the night that I moved I told him I missed him & he said he missed me too. He was supposed to stay w/ me this weekend b/c I was gonna be by myself during Hurricane Irene, but then he said he didn't feel like driving anymore. This was two days ago & I just didn't reply to that text. These are all signs that he's not into me anymore but I don't understand why. I wanna ask him what changed but IDK if that's a good idea or not. Guys are weird when it comes to talking about feelings, but I wanna know maybe he's acting this way b/c I was acting distant at first. Or maybe it's b/c I'm in New York now... I feel like whatever is going on between us we can fix it if we talked about it... but guys don't like talking Any suggestions?
KathyM Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I've been seeing this guy for about 6 weeks now. For the first month everything was great but over the last 2 weeks he's been acting very distant. At first I thought it was my fault, b/c after I slept over his house for the 1st time (we did NOT have sex) my mom took me on a whole guilt trip and then I felt bad so I started acting distant. But I got over it in a couple days and then things seemed back to be normal between us. A couple days later I noticed that he started breaking dates & not calling me as much. But he said he was having a bad week so I left him alone to deal w/ his problems. Then he texted me saying that he felt better so I asked what was wrong and he never replied. I moved to New York a few days ago for grad school (he's in Connecticut) and the night that I moved I told him I missed him & he said he missed me too. He was supposed to stay w/ me this weekend b/c I was gonna be by myself during Hurricane Irene, but then he said he didn't feel like driving anymore. This was two days ago & I just didn't reply to that text. These are all signs that he's not into me anymore but I don't understand why. I wanna ask him what changed but IDK if that's a good idea or not. Guys are weird when it comes to talking about feelings, but I wanna know maybe he's acting this way b/c I was acting distant at first. Or maybe it's b/c I'm in New York now... I feel like whatever is going on between us we can fix it if we talked about it... but guys don't like talking Any suggestions? I think he's realizing that it's not going to work out with the two of you. You live too far away. You also got a little flakey after spending the night with the guy. Shouldn't do that if you don't intend to have sex with him. It gives him mixed messages. I would let it go, if I were you, and start working on relationships with people that are close enough that you can see them often. LDRs don't normally work out, since people want to see someone regularly that they are in a relationship with.
thatone Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 and going further with that, in the future, you have to decide who you are. if your mother can convince you to push some guy away that you're dating you're going to spend many lonely years wondering why no one measures up to what your mother thinks. so if you want to avoid these things in the future decide who YOU want to be and if your mother doesn't approve, simply stop telling her about the men you date.
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