Purple Glow Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I like this girl. She flirts with me, but when this other guy is around, she ignores me. Is this a sign that I should back off? I feel like if she was really interested, she would not ignore me for some other guy. I don't want to be at the bottom of a lo ve tri angle. I've been there and it sucks.
robertdawson Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Yes, it sounds like you are only second best. You could keep trying but don't get your hopes up if it doesn't work.
P&R Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Yes, it sounds like you are only second best. You could keep trying but don't get your hopes up if it doesn't work. You should definitely troll her in real life.
Anela Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Ignoring you when another guy is around, doesn't sound good.
robertdawson Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 "You should definitely troll her in real life." uh, what does that mean?
carhill Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 She's teaching you. I hope you're a good student. You can learn a lot from women, even the not so healthy ones. Today's lesson is de-prioritization and healthy boundaries. Welcome to LS
robertdawson Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 What is she teaching him again? That women can flirt with you without really liking you (getting attention, wanting something, etc.)?
dasein Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 People have the right to flirt, date, and pursue their preferences as they see fit. The question you have to ask yourself is what she is looking for, not what you want, and then go from there in deciding if what she wants intersects with what you want, and if that can be changed. If you figure you have a shot, pursue it, don't sit back passively and wait for her to come to you, ask her out, show your interest, and if she rejects, move on. Draw things to a conclusion quickly and then move on if the result isn't satisfactory to you.
carhill Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 What is she teaching him again? That women people can flirt with you without really liking you (getting attention, wanting something, etc.)? That is one potential lesson. Another is clarifying the difference between liking a person and liking what one gets from a person. I call this the 'letting them love me' syndrome. I give them the privilege of loving me and they should appreciate that gift so generously offered. Many potential lessons. IME, women (because I've dated and married women) are great teachers
Recommended Posts