fitzgerald11 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Hey guys, i met this girl a couple of months ago, and we have been talkin' a lot lately, almost everyday...i only got one issue boys: She ain't started one convo wit me. I mean, when I start 'em, she talks back, but she ain't started one of 'em. I heard from some of my friends that are girls that every once in a while guys'll meet a girl who makes the guy always take dat first step. What y'all think, is sometin wrong wit dis picture?
chelsea2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 I initiated conversations with a guy I was dating during our "early period" and he would either take forever to answer or outright blew me off and/or seemed distant so I stopped. He never made it comfortable for me to initiate contact in the beginning and it set the stage for how our communications played out.
luvflower Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 (edited) A guy I recently started seeing started out initiating most of our contact. I barely had time to initiate sometimes but it was cool. It didnt mean I didnt like him, it just happens like that and I allowed him to do it since that's what he wanted to do. After a while it seemed like he felt pressured to keep it up so I told him I didnt wast him to feel pressured. Everything went down hill after that. He pulled back a lot .I tried to sure him that I still care, but it didnt it didnt work. So I think we're pretty much over, although we haven't discussed it. I'm trying to mentally prepare myself.... I'm really sad about it, which is why I'm here on loveshack. As of now I have also pulled back because it's turned into a situation where he seems to be playing games and I refuse to go there with him.I prefer sanity... Ben there, done that. I miss him and dont even think I can tell him now because I el like things are pretty much over. I really like him and wish to GOD that this guy would miraculously read this post and figure out this is me! I'm a big wimp I know, lol. ... But seriously, if you like this girl please dont let this happen as it has happened in my LDR... You should just be open and ask her if she feels pressured. If not, find a way to let her know that you want her for more than just to pass the time. One reason I pulled back is because I figure we're long distance and him being a guy, he may be seeing someone else to protect his feelings and tsince i dont initiate as much contact as him. Communication is KEY!! Edited August 27, 2011 by luvflower
Author fitzgerald11 Posted August 28, 2011 Author Posted August 28, 2011 A guy I recently started seeing started out initiating most of our contact. I barely had time to initiate sometimes but it was cool. It didnt mean I didnt like him, it just happens like that and I allowed him to do it since that's what he wanted to do. After a while it seemed like he felt pressured to keep it up so I told him I didnt wast him to feel pressured. Everything went down hill after that. He pulled back a lot .I tried to sure him that I still care, but it didnt it didnt work. So I think we're pretty much over, although we haven't discussed it. I'm trying to mentally prepare myself.... I'm really sad about it, which is why I'm here on loveshack. As of now I have also pulled back because it's turned into a situation where he seems to be playing games and I refuse to go there with him.I prefer sanity... Ben there, done that. I miss him and dont even think I can tell him now because I el like things are pretty much over. I really like him and wish to GOD that this guy would miraculously read this post and figure out this is me! I'm a big wimp I know, lol. ... But seriously, if you like this girl please dont let this happen as it has happened in my LDR... You should just be open and ask her if she feels pressured. If not, find a way to let her know that you want her for more than just to pass the time. One reason I pulled back is because I figure we're long distance and him being a guy, he may be seeing someone else to protect his feelings and tsince i dont initiate as much contact as him. Communication is KEY!! Thanks. Dat was very helpful n i get wer u r comin from. I got one problem, we ain't together. If i say somethin like "you feelin' pressured?" i would be afraid because it mite sound weird or like I'm movin' too fast...does that make sense?
luvflower Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Thanks. Dat was very helpful n i get wer u r comin from. I got one problem, we ain't together. If i say somethin like "you feelin' pressured?" i would be afraid because it mite sound weird or like I'm movin' too fast...does that make sense? Guess what, me & the guy I'm speaking about aren't together either. It's just easier to say"my guy" for the sake of time while typing my posts. Yes, what you said makes sense... especially sense my ego is just as fragile as yours. Honestly, she's probably feeling the same as you. Try not to allow your ego to get in the way of possibly being in a wonderful relationship. How much do you like this chic? I'm assuming a lot since you decided to come on this site. May I ask if both you have pulled back a lot lately? If so, why do people do dat so much in relationships? Has she accused you of playing games? holla back!
Author fitzgerald11 Posted August 28, 2011 Author Posted August 28, 2011 A guy I recently started seeing started out initiating most of our contact. I barely had time to initiate sometimes but it was cool. It didnt mean I didnt like him, it just happens like that and I allowed him to do it since that's what he wanted to do. After a while it seemed like he felt pressured to keep it up so I told him I didnt wast him to feel pressured. Everything went down hill after that. He pulled back a lot .I tried to sure him that I still care, but it didnt it didnt work. So I think we're pretty much over, although we haven't discussed it. I'm trying to mentally prepare myself.... I'm really sad about it, which is why I'm here on loveshack. As of now I have also pulled back because it's turned into a situation where he seems to be playing games and I refuse to go there with him.I prefer sanity... Ben there, done that. I miss him and dont even think I can tell him now because I el like things are pretty much over. I really like him and wish to GOD that this guy would miraculously read this post and figure out this is me! I'm a big wimp I know, lol. ... But seriously, if you like this girl please dont let this happen as it has happened in my LDR... You should just be open and ask her if she feels pressured. If not, find a way to let her know that you want her for more than just to pass the time. One reason I pulled back is because I figure we're long distance and him being a guy, he may be seeing someone else to protect his feelings and tsince i dont initiate as much contact as him. Communication is KEY!! thank you so much girl...as an update i was talkin to her, and i just straight up told her that i wanted to kno if she enjoyed talkin to me at all. She told me it was "exhausting" because i chatted her so much. I told her that was only cuz i never knew when I was gonna talk or hear from her again...and she finally told me (honestly y'all she never actually had told me this up till today) that she liked me, and when I offered her some space, she told me that she didn't want space if it meant i wouldn't write to her anymore. So we resolved the whole damn thang and it's lookin like we are going on da up n up. This looks like the beginnins of an actual importan relationship. Thanks again y'all
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