Sweetheartt Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Im staying in today cause all of this hurricane **** lol so I went out last night w/ this guy my friend set me up w/ & he was awesome. We went to bbqs & then to the movies to see dont be afraid of the dark. That movie was ****ing scary lol. Omg all those whispers was freaking everybody out. Anyway when a few scary parts came on I freaked & covered my eyes & thats when my date would put his arm around me. I was kinda cool w/ it so I buried my head in his shoulder. He's 23 & me 19 so its all good. But then he tried to kiss me during the talkey scenes! I pulled away. I can tell he was kinda embarassed or w/e or I wasnt that comfortable to kiss so fast! Its our 1st date! Anyway, um...we didnt say much after that but he was still nice & then he drove me home & said he'll call me. I said okay & gave him a hug. I told my sister about the date & how he wanted to kiss & my sis says I messed up in not letting him. Is she for real? Anyway when I told my friend about it she said I was being a bitch again! How does it make me a bitch for not sucking face so fast? U tell me guys.
Cracker Jack Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 (edited) I don't think so. If you didn't want to kiss him, then you didn't want to kiss him. That's really what it comes down to. At least the dude tried and was cool about it being rejected. What I will say, tho, is that he might be reluctant in going for a kiss next time. Wouldn't blame him, either. Edited August 27, 2011 by Cracker Jack
Professor X Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 How does it make me a bitch for not sucking face so fast? U tell me guys. I didn't know your kissing is actually face sucking, jeez, gotta dodge you. j/k On topic: You weren't a bitch. I think you're sister is a bit of a freak to say something like that. Or she was just teasing you; Who knows?
somedude81 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 You weren't a bitch. BTW, did you actually tell the guy that you aren't comfortable kissing so soon?
Abhuman Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 It's not a big deal, especially since he seemed to act like a good sport about it. Whenever it is you do want to kiss him you'll probably have to make the move because I doubt he will want to risk another awkward moment like that. Basically he's probably going to wait for "permission" next time. Did he try to kiss you during the hug? If not look at it this way, he's respecting your reluctance to kiss this early. That's pretty cool.
Eddie Edirol Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 You werent bieng a bitch, but now you will have to make the move if he is reluctant to kiss you next time. You will have to show him youre still interested, because now to him, you seem like you werent attracted to him.
Easyguy14 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 You werent bieng a bitch, but now you will have to make the move if he is reluctant to kiss you next time. You will have to show him youre still interested, because now to him, you seem like you werent attracted to him. definitely agree with this. from reading some of your other threads I often get the feeling you're a game-player that likes to tease guys, but since you went on a date finally I may be wrong. but to dodge a kiss seems odd to me. it was just a kiss right? you didn't say anything about him trying to make out with you. next time, loosen up a little more so you dont loss out on him or other guys that are into you.
make me believe Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 No you definitely were not a bitch! You aren't obligated to make out with him, especially on the first date! I'm surprised that your sister & friend are giving you sh*t for it & making you feel like you did something wrong. Sheesh.
Easyguy14 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 No you definitely were not a bitch! You aren't obligated to make out with him, especially on the first date! I'm surprised that your sister & friend are giving you sh*t for it & making you feel like you did something wrong. Sheesh. maybe its because sweetheart plays head games, ever thought of that?
zengirl Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Nothing wrong with not wanting to kiss a guy yet or not wanting to kiss someone so early.
Easyguy14 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Nothing wrong with not wanting to kiss a guy yet or not wanting to kiss someone so early. I find a lot wrong with it because the guy was trying to set the tone for future dates by expressing how he feels about her. when sweetheart had the audacity to reject the kiss it showed that she's not as willing as he is to move to the next step. she needs to correct this.
Feelsgoodman Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Nothing wrong with not wanting to kiss a guy yet or not wanting to kiss someone so early. If you are not interested in the guy, sure. However, if you like him, you will potentially be ruining things by creating awkwardness.
zengirl Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 If you are not interested in the guy, sure. However, if you like him, you will potentially be ruining things by creating awkwardness. No one, male or female, should ever feel rushed to a relationship step they're not interested in. Asserting her boundaries is fine and any man who respects her will recognize this as a positive thing. That said, sure, if she wants to kiss him, she may need to give him a strong green light or make the move herself when she's ready now, because he will be naturally cautious (out of respect) if he's interested in continuing. It could've also scared him off, sure, but if it did? Then he probably wasn't a good fit for her. I find a lot wrong with it because the guy was trying to set the tone for future dates by expressing how he feels about her. when sweetheart had the audacity to reject the kiss it showed that she's not as willing as he is to move to the next step. she needs to correct this. The audacity to reject the kiss? That's ridiculous. Look, he may be ready for physicality that she is not ready for. That's life. If that's a dealbreaker for him, it was never going to go well anyway. She's NOT as willing as he is to move to that step right now, and that's perfectly fine.
rafallus Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Nope, he just failed to get you to want kiss badly enough. I had a woman push me away from me trying to kiss her, then having herself initiating make out session within several minutes. Attraction is fickle matter.
Feelsgoodman Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 No one, male or female, should ever feel rushed to a relationship step they're not interested in. Asserting her boundaries is fine and any man who respects her will recognize this as a positive thing. In an ideal world, everyone would have the same sense of timing and make all the right moves at exactly the right moment. In the real world, everyone has a different sense of timing and different comfort zones. Some girls don't want to kiss on the first or even the second and third date. Others believe that if the guy hasn't attempted to kiss them by the second date at the latest, he is not interested. This is a source of much confusion for both sexes. So while I agree that people should stay within their "comfort zone" (provided the said zone is reasonable) when it comers to important decisions, such as moving in together, when it comes to smaller things, you will inevitably have to step outside of your comfort zone every now and then. I know that the OP is a troll (having read her other posts), but the point she raises is an interesting one. What would you rather do - stay within your comfort zone and risk ruining things with a guy you like or suffer a minor discomfort for the sake of avoiding an awkward situation?
Easyguy14 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 No one, male or female, should ever feel rushed to a relationship step they're not interested in. Asserting her boundaries is fine and any man who respects her will recognize this as a positive thing. That said, sure, if she wants to kiss him, she may need to give him a strong green light or make the move herself when she's ready now, because he will be naturally cautious (out of respect) if he's interested in continuing. It could've also scared him off, sure, but if it did? Then he probably wasn't a good fit for her. The audacity to reject the kiss? That's ridiculous. Look, he may be ready for physicality that she is not ready for. That's life. If that's a dealbreaker for him, it was never going to go well anyway. She's NOT as willing as he is to move to that step right now, and that's perfectly fine. how's that perfectly fine? I dont think so. are you one that does similar things when on dates with guys you like? pull away when all he wants is a kiss to know that you're into him? see it would be different if sweetheart said she wasn't into him. but she didn't. she said he was awesome so she obviously likes the guy but refused to show it. that's a head-game to me. and what's with the name-calling? calling people trolls. next thing it'll be ghouls and goblins
Author Sweetheartt Posted August 28, 2011 Author Posted August 28, 2011 how's that perfectly fine? I dont think so. are you one that does similar things when on dates with guys you like? pull away when all he wants is a kiss to know that you're into him? see it would be different if sweetheart said she wasn't into him. but she didn't. she said he was awesome so she obviously likes the guy but refused to show it. that's a head-game to me. and what's with the name-calling? calling people trolls. next thing it'll be ghouls and goblins U dont know me first of all ok. Just because I said he was awesome dont mean I want him all over me in the movie theatre. I like to date a little bit more before I get exclusive yada yada. Im tired of horny guys ok. Anyway he called me tonight & we talked & he asked me out for tuesday so we're good to go. I'll see how it goes
Rinas Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I saw that movie on friday. I thought it was awful, and a poor excuse of a horror movie. Not scary at all. Just let the guy know what's going on, if he's a decet guy he won't let his ego get in the way.
Eddie Edirol Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Nope, he just failed to get you to want kiss badly enough. Attraction is fickle matter. Absolutely.... He jumped at the wrong time and didnt turn her on enough to WANT that kiss, lucky for him she still wants to try again.
Easyguy14 Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Absolutely.... He jumped at the wrong time and didnt turn her on enough to WANT that kiss, lucky for him she still wants to try again. are you kidding me? lucky for her he's still giving it another go. I cant see why people think its okay to cuddle up with a person you're trying to date but not let them get a little kiss for assurance. it seems juvenile to me.
rafallus Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Is it even relevant, who gives who a go? I cant see why people think its okay to cuddle up with a person you're trying to date but not let them get a little kiss for assurance. it seems juvenile to me. Simple - progression of things. Pace was not proper at that moment.
Easyguy14 Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Is it even relevant, who gives who a go? Simple - progression of things. Pace was not proper at that moment. Im still not understanding this. if sweetheart was okay with this guy taking her into his arms for comfort during the movie they were watching, then I think it'll be okay to let a small kiss progress. from my experience in dating whenever I embraced a woman I always got a kiss. never once did I get a pull-back or rejection. it just destroys the mood. a warm embrace followed by a kiss goes hand-in-hand.
carhill Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Anyway when I told my friend about it she said I was being a bitch again! How does it make me a bitch for not sucking face so fast? U tell me guys. IMO, bitch is a bit strong of a word. Sucking face is not typically what I would ascribe an affectionate kiss as. How do you view kissing? Reflecting on past experiences, I can't recall an exception to the end result of similar circumstances being a mind-fµck. In the reverse, where clear indications of mutual attraction and affection were returned, regardless of whether the dating or relationship worked out in the end, the feeling regarding it (the beginning) remained positive. I'll assume OP is young, hence 'sucking face'. That's not an indictment, but rather an impetus to learn from this and enjoy the date on Tuesday
Hot Chick Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I agree with you about the first kiss in a movie theatre. It is a public place and is often packed with people. Sorry, I don't want others having a public show of me making out. He should have thought of this, that maybe you have more class than to want to make out for the first time in a movie theatre. Maybe he would want you to actually be ALONE and not watching a movie, as bad or good as the plot may have been. So...I'm with you. I would have refused to kiss him, also, and I think your response to him about not wanting him all over you in front of everyone in a movie theatre was a great response.
Easyguy14 Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 IMO, bitch is a bit strong of a word. Sucking face is not typically what I would ascribe an affectionate kiss as. How do you view kissing? Reflecting on past experiences, I can't recall an exception to the end result of similar circumstances being a mind-fµck. In the reverse, where clear indications of mutual attraction and affection were returned, regardless of whether the dating or relationship worked out in the end, the feeling regarding it (the beginning) remained positive. I'll assume OP is young, hence 'sucking face'. That's not an indictment, but rather an impetus to learn from this and enjoy the date on Tuesday yea she's young. she's 19. that's a baby in the dating world even though not by other standards. sweetheart is the same girl that cancelled a date with a guy to hang out with her friends instead. that's juvenile. now she's cancelling kisses with guys she likes? not trying to be harsh but this girl has a lot of growing up to do. she'll be 21 in 2 years so it has to happen pretty soon.
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